Many local churches mishandle disagreement and conflict.  In a perfect world, disagreements and conflict would be resolved in a healthy manner that builds stronger relationships.  But in the church (and in many families) they are often unresolved and lead to unhealthy behaviors that cause further problems.  

      One of the most common ways churches choose to address problems is to not address them.  The assumption behind this seems to be that if a problem is ignored, it will go away.  The problem with that logic is that all too often it simply isn't true.  Problems ignored often are like placing a dead animal in the backyard.  In time they just stink. 

     When churches do choose to address problems, they often do so in unhealthy ways that make matters worse.  As pastors for many years and now as state pastors, we have noticed several forms of unhealthy behavior in churches that create discord and cripple relationships.     continue reading