Most of us have set new year's resolutions at some
point in our lives, and my guess is that very rarely do
they last past the month of January. In fact, I know
that quite often they don't even last past the first
week of the new year.
So what is is about new year's resolutions that
dooms them to failure? Why do they so consistently
go wrong? Is it because they are uninspiring? Is it
because we don't build in the correct support
mechanisms? Is it because we don't really expect to
succeed with them?
Probably yes on all counts. But the biggest one for
me is undoubtedly the last one. You see, the noun
"resolution" is closely associated with the
verb resolve,
one of its meanings being to solve, settle or put an
end to. In fact there is even a hangover cure called
Resolve!
So the word resolution has connotations of fixing
something that is broken or righting the wrongs of
the previous year.
As I have alluded in previous coaching tips, basing a
goal or target on something that is wrong and needs
fixing, focuses on the negative. The laws of
attraction indicate
that this will generate more of the same.
So how can you create a resolution that excludes all
references to lack or fixing something?
You may remember that I wrote a tip a few months
ago about creating and committing to paper a vision
of a created future that is written in the present
tense, as if you have achieved your vision already.
So here is my alternative to a set of new year's
resolutions. Write yourself a letter dated 31st
December 2006. In that letter, imagine yourself
sitting down on the last day of 2006 having achieved
all your goals and write to you
today describing how you feel.
The most important part of the letter is to ensure
that it emphasises the positive and says "I have ..."
and "I now feel ..." and that it doesn't say "I will
have ..." or "I would like to have ..." or "I hope to
feel ...".
So think of those resolutions that you were going to
create and imagine that you have succeeded with all
of them throughout 2006. How do you feel, what
have you got, and what have you done?
Now, or at least before January 1st, sit down and
write that letter. It doesn't have to be long, it
doesn't have to be complicated and you don't even
have to know exactly how you're going to achieve it
all. Just enjoy writing it and see if you can feel how
good it feels having been so successful.
Thanks for reading. Next issue on January 25th.
A happy, successful and prosperous New Year to
you. Until next time,
