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Greetings!
How good are you at reading people's thoughts?
Want to find out for free?
Actually, I think you'll find you're probably pretty good.
We're inviting you to test your mind reading abilities for FREE. Before you take your free assessment, let's review what goes into good communication.
The way we communicate is made up of many factors, but it is commonly accepted that how we communicate is broken down into three groups; the words we choose (7%), our tone of voice, or the way we say those words (38%) and our body language; the way we stand or sit, facial expressions, the way we hold our head, our eyes, our hands. Pretty much every part of our body tells a story and that makes up (55%) of the way we communicate.
In this newsletter we're going to focus on the 55% - body language, but really they all work together. If you've ever watched the TV show, "Lie To Me" you realize that there is a lot that goes in to being able to read someones body language. In the show, because it's a show, they focus on deception. But in real interactions, I don't think that is the main reason our words or tone may communicate one thing and our body language another. We are usually not consciously trying to lie to someone. But nevertheless we often send out mixed messages.
Granting that it takes a lot of training to become an expert, I would propose that just becoming more aware of others that we interact with face to face, will increase our ability to understand others and therefore interact with them better. The truth is, we are either consciously or unconsciously trying to communicate with each other everyday. And we've picked up a lot of body language messages in dealing with people. In fact, I think we're all just about experts. But we're not consciously aware of what we're doing, so we're not as consistent as we could be. I mean, look how long we've studied it!
Why not consciously become more aware of the messages we're getting and sending? And, let's be honest, trying to 'read' others is not only profitable, it's a heck of a lot of fun!
So here are a couple of tips.
Watch for lymbic synchronicity. That is just the fancy way of saying, notice if everything about the person is in sync. Do things match up? For instance, if someone is smiling at you, backing away and have their arms crossed, they are not in sync. Someone smiling at you and in sync would usually be moving closer and have an open posture.
How do you feel? Don't ignore the feelings you are receiving from others. We are all putting out energy. How is their energy interacting with yours? And yes, of course you can feel it. Ever been in love? That's a strong energy pull, obviously in sync. A less extreme but still very real example are the times you feel comfortable, relaxed or invigorated in someone else' presence. That too is energy connecting and communicating.
Be present. Practice focusing on the person you are talking with. (And it does take practice.) Stop, look and listen. Stop the voice in your head that is telling you to have the right answer, planning your next move or looking for your turn to talk. Look at the person and focus on them. The movie Avatar used the term, "I see you". Listen to what they are saying. You will be in sync and consciously activate your ability to 'get the message'.
To your success,
Bruce
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| Free Reading People Assessment | | | |
Free Assessment
The more we know about how to communicate, the better able we are to communicate. With this assessment you'll focus on peoples eyes and try to determine what emotion they are communicating. This assessment was first developed by Simon Baron-Cohen a psychopathology professor at Stanford University and appeared in "The Essential Difference".
After you've completed your answers, take a look at the scoring sheet to see how well you did.
This is a great exercise to use with anyone in your organization, but is an especially useful tool with any of your front line marketers, CSR's, salespeople, greeters, cashiers and customer care team.
Use it as an ice breaker to help focus your team. Use it as a discussion starter in your sales meeting.
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The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances; if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
Carl Jung
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