Better Conversations Newsletter
"Raising the Standard of Conversation in Life"
Dr. Loren EkrothLoren Ekroth, Ph.D.
 
aka "Dr.Conversation" 
Are You Networking or Pollinating?
Loren Ekroth photo
Today's Contents
Conversation Quotation
Jest Words
Word-a-Week
Can You Reach One?
Barbed Ire in Latin
Words of Inspiration
Are You Networking or Pollinating?
Please Post on Social Media
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This Week's Issue:
September 7,2012

Hello again, subscriber friends!

 

Today: Are You Networking or Pollinating?
 
Loren Ekroth, publisher

[email protected]

Today's Contents

Words this issue: 774   Reading Time:  3 minutes  

  1. Conversation Quotation
  2. Jest Words
  3. Word-a-Week
  4. Can each one reach one?
  5. Barbed Ire: Try Latin
  6. Words of Inspiration
  7. This week's article
  8. Please Post in Social Media

 

1. Conversation Quotation 

 

"I don't have to attend every argument I'm invited to."
 

--Dorothy Parker, author

2. Jest Words    

"If no one ever took risks, Michelangelo would have painted the Sistine floor." --Neil Simon, playwright

3.  Word-a-Week:  coevolution

Meaning: The evolution of two or more interdependent species, each adapting to changes in the other. It occurs, for example, between predators and prey and between insects and the flowers that they pollinate.

 

Example: "Coevolution is often seen in a number of species of flowering plants that coevolved with specific pollinators like insects.. The pollinator gets a reward such as nectar for pollinating the plant."

4.  Can Each One Reach One?

 

Because you value the practical ideas in the "Better Conversations" newsletters, please recommend them to your friends and co-workers with a note. (You can do so by forwarding this newsletter or by using the "Recommend to a Friend" button.)

 

By sharing a valued resource with someone you know, you'll offer them practical ideas, and you'll be participating in a "Renaissance of Conversation" around the world.

 

Personal note: I've learned that when I share valuable resources with others, they often reciprocate and share good resources with me. "What goes around, comes around."

5.   Barbed Ire In Latin

 

If you want to gently poke fun at a blowhard, try Latin:

 

Lingua factiosi, inertes opera.

 

Translation: "All talk, no action."

 

(It's unlikely that your target will understand. But you'll feel better.)

6.  Words of Inspiration

"Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive." --Howard Thurman, theologian, interfaith minister

7.  Are You Networking or Pollinating?

  

Pollinate definition: To transfer pollen from a stamen to a pistil; fertilization in flowering plants.

 

Pollination helps both co-(mutually) evolve.

 

Without bees and butterflies, no pollination. Without pollination, no flowering, no honey or corn.

 

Network definition: To meet people who might be useful to know, especially in your job.

 

Many business and professional meetings set aside a time for "networking" during which attendees chat and exchange business cards.

 

 

Pollination adds some of value to both participants. The pollinator gets a reward such as nectar for pollinating the plant.

 

An example by George Bernard Shaw of humans "pollinating each other."

 

"If I give you an apple and you give me an apple, we both have an apple. But if I give you an idea and you give me an idea, we both have 2 ideas."

 

Both prosper by gaining a new idea.

 

However, for such human pollination to work, both must be receptive to the transaction. Also, people who interact only with those with the same ideas do not grow.

 

However, when those interacting are diverse, both can gain. For example, an artist and an engineer, a realtor and a teacher, a Catholic and a Jew.

 

(Two practical applications of "cross-fertilization" occur in small Mastermind groups composed of a mix of people supporting one another and in "Knowledge Cafes" where participants periodically move to other tables to share what they've learned.)

 

My late friend Anne Boe, co-author of "Is Your Net Working?", was clear that participants should "give without an expectation that doing so will reap an immediate reward." Instead, she recommended that you give because it's the right thing to do.

 

Some ways to "pollinate" include 1) sharing useful ideas; 2) validating others; expressing enthusiasm; making introductions.

 

As psychologist Robert Cialdini described in his classic book, "Influence," the principle of reciprocity is powerful. When we give a gift, compliment a person, or do them a favor, the receiver usually feels a need to reciprocate, if not immediately, then later on.

 

In today's article I drew upon nature, mainly biology, to find a new paradigm for relating to others. In short, it is this: When we do more than connect, when we add something that gives more vitality to those we connect with, everybody gains, everybody wins.

8. Please Post on Social Media
Just above the header "Better Conversations Newsletter" at the top of this issue, you'll see icons for Facebook and Twitter.  Clicking on F icon will take you to your Facebook page. The link to this issue will also appear.  You can add a comment and post it so your friends can access this newsletter.

 

Your assistance will help to "Raise the Standard of

Conversation in Life."  Many thanks.

Loren Ekroth �2012, all rights reserved

 

Loren Ekroth, Ph.D. is a specialist in human communication and a national expert on conversation for business and social life. 

 

Contact at [email protected]