From time to time, we all receive some shocks or insults from others. Told "You're fired!" or "You're the most stupid person in the room."
In the heat of the moment, your instant reaction might be to blurt out something you'd later regret.
A simple analogy: When you're driving and a car swerves to cut you off, you hit the brakes and avoid a collision. You're grateful you have well-maintained brakes. "Whew!" That was a close one.
Similarly, when you're the target of harsh words, it's best to avoid a crash. The harsh message is not that you should react immediately, but "Danger ahead, apply brakes!" And automatically, as you do when braking.
How? By installing a habit that gives you time to think before reacting.
Here's a time-tested method:
Pause and take a deep breath or two before you react. About 10 seconds.
To install this habit, you can practice by using radio or TV talk shows that get you riled up. When you hear something inflammatory, use that as a trigger to stop, breathe, and calm down. Then you'll be able to respond mindfully to people instead of reacting instantly with a "fight" impulse.
Until next week, Loren
