Better Conversations Newsletter
"Raising the Standard of Conversation in Life"
goldminer

Gold Miner

Loren Ekroth, Ph.D.
 
aka "Dr.Conversation" 
Nugget: "Please and Thank You"
Loren Ekroth photo
Nugget: "Please and Thank You"
Quick Links
Join Our List
Join Our Mailing List
"Please and Thank you"
    new nugget
Jan 5. 2012

Hello again, subscriber friend! 

 

Nugget:  "Please and Thank you"

 

If you like this nugget, please forward it to a friend. Link is on left side of screen.  It's easy. 

 

(Reading time: 1 minute.)  

 

Loren Ekroth, publisher 

[email protected]

Nugget: "Please and Thank you"
Whatever happened to civility and courtesy? Not "cool" any longer?

 

Here are 3 words and phrases to use all the time:

 

1. "Please," as in "Please pass the butter," and "Please move your car."

 

 

2.  "Thank you." Not just nodding and grunting. Actually speaking the two words clearly or, more briefly as "Thanks."

 

Who don't say "Thank you"?  Unsocialized children and some "superiors" who have a sense of entitlement.

 

3.  "You're welcome." (Please, don't say "no problem," which, like Teflon, deflects the gratitude.)

 

Alternatives? To a person giving you a compliment, "Thanks for saying so." Or, as a waiter, "It's my pleasure." Or a physician might say "I'm glad I could help." There are many other permutations that convey "You're welcome."

 

Virtually all societies studied by anthropologists have these 3 types of expression. Why? Because, while seemingly trivial, they serve important functions in the fabric of a society.

 

Here is what Daniel Bader, Ph.D., a scholar of "the art of living," wrote:

 

"Please" and "thank you" are terms that help show others that we do not consider them as subordinates. By saying "please" and "thank you", we show others that we are concerned with their "pleasure" and that we are "thinking" of them. Using these terms, then, are very important. When other people help us they put themselves in a vulnerable position. By using these terms, we show that we do not consider them our inferiors."

 

Little things we say (or don't say) mean a lot when we relate to others. "Please," "Thank you," and "You're welcome" provide cushions against the bumps and bruises of social and business life and make living more congenial.

 

Until next week,

 

Loren 

 

Loren Ekroth �2012, all rights reserved

 

Loren Ekroth, Ph.D. is a specialist in human communication and a national expert on conversation for business and social life. 

 

Contact at [email protected]