Many commentators have expressed despair that the art of
conversation was dying or dead, having been replaced by
electronic communication like email, Facebook, and Twitter.
One expert concluded that college students prefer text messages to phone conversations with parents, perhaps because texting is less personal.
What to do? Here are some practical ideas that center
on placing yourself in conversation-rich environments.
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Conversation Café
Join or host a Conversation Cafe at some restaurant or coffee house in your town. The website and organizing hosts for www.conversationcafe.org has been moved to Richmond, VA and is once again up and running with lots of resources for
anyone who wants to start such a group. No dues or fixed memberships, only quality talk with a group of interesting people. Check it out.
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Lunch and Learn groups.
These groups are often coordinated by someone in the workplace but can be held with any group. Example: One person skilled in digital photography is invited to present an informal program in any handy meeting room during a mid-day break. Attendees bring bag lunches. Or a group of folks with a common interest like raising orchids could come together and share ideas. You can use Craigslist.com to post free notices, or you can invite folks with www.evite.com.
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Put together a MasterMind group of 4 to 6 people who become career resources for one another and take turns being the focus during which they ask for support with ideas and networking connections. Jack Canfield's great book, "The Success Principles" has an excellent short chapter on how to form and manage such a conversation group.
- Select individuals of interest who are good conversationalists and invite them to lunch. We learn best by example, and spending time with skillful talkers with interesting ideas will rub off on you. If they are good, do as they do.
- Form a study circle. Lots of resources are available. In the U.S., the program is now called Everyday Democracy and can be contacted for resources and guidelines and http://www.everyday-democracy.org.
The focus is reading materials about, then discussing issues of interest in your community. The materials are a-political and provide a background on whatever issues you decide to discuss.
- Start a monthly event like "The Art of Conversation" get-togethers in Edmonton, Albert, Canada, that has continued successfully for many years.
A wide variety of people attend to engage others in quality talk. A local talk-show host started this event and continues to announce it. They meet in various pleasant venues, usually hotels.
The key to resuscitate the dying art of conversation is to make
intelligent conversation the purpose of getting together.
You can "talk above the noise" of the many distractions like
TV, video games, or blaring music.
When I grew up before television, conversation was the
entertainment for adults. On a Saturday evening, couples
would gather over cake and coffee and talk about their
lives and times, reminisce, and even tell stories. If you
manage the way you get together with friends, you can
also have a good time with conversation as the focus.
Here's what can happen if the electronic distractions are absent. (On the craft of conversation in the small nation of Cuba):
"Cuba is one of the last places with a high-density of living with no consumer based advertising. The Internet is not available to everyone that lives there and therefore in order to find stuff, most locals need to speak to each other to work out what, where, when, how, why etc, for almost everything. The result is a culture based on listening and speaking in the flesh. The craft of conversation is alive and well in this part of the world.
No wonder everyone's dancing in Cuba."
