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LATEST NEWS
- Counseling Associates is pleased to welcome a new psychiatrist, Dr. Jennifer Harrington, M.D., to our staff. Dr. Harrington comes to us from Wayne State University.
- We have a slight correction from our last mailing. The copay for Medicare clients remains at 45% this year--it will drop to 40% in 2012. It will then drop again to 35% in 2013, then finally all the way to 20% in 2014. We apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused.
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MASTERING CONVERSATION
Do you know someone who can talk to anyone, anywhere, anytime and always seem to be at ease? Although a few folks may naturally be cunning conversationalists, many people find keeping the chatter flowing is not easy. However, becoming a "chat master" is a skill that you can learn, with a few tips and some practice.
STARTING OFF
You can start a strong conversation before you even open your mouth. Your own body language (non-verbal communication) projects your willingness to talk, so that others will perceive you as being open to them. A key phrase in recalling the importance of body language is "SOFTEN IT." In other words:
- S-Smile.
- O-Open, by your body posture. For example, do not put your desk between you and the other person.
- F-Forward lean (shows you are interested.)
- T-Touch (appropriately). For example, shaking hands.
- E-Eye contact.
- N-Nod (not to sleep.)
In beginning a conversation, willingly take a risk. Whether you're comfortable or not, it's how you'll meet new people and open your own doors to opportunity. Yes, you may be rejected, but more likely you will be accepted. If, however, the other person doesn't talk back, you haven't lost anything.
WHERE DO WE BEGIN?
What should you say to a stranger? Try a "Ritual" question-one that invites an easy response. For example, some Ritual topics are sports, hobbies, family (especially kids), restaurants, movies and vacations.
Another very effective way of getting a discussion going is paying someone an appropriate compliment, such as "I like your shirt," "that is a great hairstyle you have," or "I like that sweater, was it a gift?"
KEEP IT UP
Actively listening to the other person is a key point in keeping up a conversation. Make sure you are following the "SOFTEN" approach and focus on what the other person is sharing. Seek more information from them by asking relevant questions (although try not to get too personal.) Also, disclose something about yourself in the process.
Another phrase worth remembering is "focusing on finding out." In other words, ask about big events in the other person's life and what they meant to them. Also, share meaningful events from your own life and exchange feelings about them. Additionally, see if you can find out common experiences or interests. If you willingly share something about yourself and focus on the situation you are in, your conversation should probably flow just fine.
HOW DO WE SAY GOODBYE?
Closing a conversation is best if you end on a positive note. Say something such as "It's been a pleasure talking with you" or "I hope we can talk again soon." If you are pressed for time, let the other person know and ask for another time when you can continue talking.
Remember that you can learn and grow from talking with others. Even if a conversation doesn't continue on for long, you can always gain from the experience.
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STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY?If you find, even after using our tips and practicing, that the conversations just aren't rolling like you want them to, our counselors can help you find out if there's something else keeping you from becoming a wizard of gab.
To schedule an appointment with a counselor, or if you wish to refer someone, please call Counseling Associates at (248) 626-1500 or visit our Web site by clicking here. Our phones are answered 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Sincerely,
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Dr. Sidney H. Grossberg, Ph.D., Executive Director
Counseling Associates
6960 Orchard Lake Road, Suite 100 West Bloomfield, MI 48322 (248) 626-1500 |
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