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Waiting Children
Please click on the AdoptUSKids link to view CT's children and youth waiting to be adopted. |
| Upcoming Events |
Please visit our events calendar on our website for a complete and up-to-date listing of ALL events that we will be appearing at. The events listed in this area are those we are hosting or play a significant role in.
Job Interview Skills for Teens - Having What I t Takes
New Britain, CT
June 30
11th Annual Family Fun Day
Quassy Amusement Park, Middlebury
August 5
Ring of Hope
Prospect, CT
August 17
Wolcott Fair
Wolcott, CT
August 19-21
Avon Days
Avon, CT
September 24
Bells of Hope
Throughout CT
November 4-6th
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Wednesday's Child 
WTNH Channel 8 airs a weekly segment featuring CT children available for adoption and families formed through adoption. Click on the logo above to see recent video segments hosted by Ted Koppy. |
Open House schedule available on our website
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Prospective foster and adoptive parents are welcome at any Open House listed on our website. Please call one of the regional coordinators listed at the bottom of this newsletter or email
us for more information or to schedule an individual appointment.
Click here for the most current listing of open houses across the state. |
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Job Interview Skills Training Photos | | |
During our training this past week, our teens were fortunate to experience a mock interview with one of several wonderful
volunteers. DCF Commissioner Katz teamed with Caryl Hallberg, CEO of Covenant to Care to interview a number of the teens.
Kelly Cronin, Executive Director of Waterbury Youth Services graciously volunteered her time to conduct interviews. And our friends at Klingberg Family Centers
not only donated the space for the training but Dave Tompkins, VP and Christine Keys, the new Director of Specialized Foster Care and Adoption Services also conducted interviews all morning. Our mock interviewers spoke with the teens afterwards. They were incredibly inspiring. Teens left with a new confidence in their skills and sure in the knowledge that these adults really care about their futures!
Our thanks to everyone who gave so generously of their time to make this training a reality. In particular, we cannot thank our wonderful
instructor, Jacquie Strawson enough. Jacquie put together the curriculum and volunteered to teach the class. She was awesome!
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Volume 3, Edition 6 June 2011 |
Greetings!
Summer is finally here and the kids are out of school. FAM started our summer break with a bang! We hosted 28 teens for our first Job Interview Skills training. Feedback from the participants was great (except they would like Pop-Tarts next time). We plan to tweak our presentation and offer it again sometime this fall. Our 11th Annual Quassy Family Fun Day is coming up soon. Licensed families - don't forget to send in your RSVPs! If your child has art or poetry they would like to submit for publishing in the newsletter contact me. We love submissions from young people. Have a great Fourth of July! 
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| Talking with Your Teen About Relationships and Sex | |  This week FAM co-sponsored a Job Interview Skills Training for teens. While the kids were in the classroom, we offered foster/adoptive parents the opportunity to get together and talk. One of the topics we covered was talking to teens about relationships and sex. Below are some tips we came up with.
Did you know that:
Almost 25% of teens who say they are virgins have engaged in oral sex? And 90% of teens who have had sex have engaged in oral sex?
Young people ages 15-24 have FOUR TIMES both the reported Chlamydia and Gonorrhea rates of the total population?
African American 13-24 year olds account for 60% of the HIV/AIDS diagnoses in 2006?
One in 5 (estimated) Americans has genital herpes and up to 90% of them do not know it.
Teens are the most likely population to contract HPV (human papilloma virus) infections. Some surveys estimate almost 40% of all teens may contract HPV.
Approximately 10,000 teens contract an STI (STD) every day.
Scary, isn't it? And teens as a population tend to think of themselves as invincible. What can you do to help the teens in your home? Here are some tips for talking to your teen about sex and relationships.
Start the conversation early. We know that many times kids are not living with you when they are young so start as soon as you can. And talk as often as possible. Use everyday situations to begin the conversation. A movie or a book they have read or even a trip to the local mall can become a teachable moment.
- Define sex for them. Use correct labels and provide accurate information. At the end of this article we have provided links to several websites with information for parents to use when talking about sex and healthy relationships.
- Include discussions on oral sex in particular. Oral sex is not seen as "real sex" by many teens. It is not uncommon for teens to engage in casual oral sex during parties - sometimes with more than one partner. This is a topic that definitely needs open and honest discussion.
- Ask your teen to define terms such as "hooking up" and "friends with benefits." Kids define these terms differently and you will need to explore your teen's understanding of these terms and others.
- Educate your teen on the health risks associated with sexual activity. But note that scaring them is not as effective as repeated open discussion with a trusted adult.
- Explain what can and often does happen to teens' reputations when they engage in casual sex. Better yet, ask them to provide examples from their experiences at school.
- Remind them that ultimately they are in charge of their own bodies and the decisions that they make sexually.
- Take into account their point of view. Being an adolescent is tough and peer pressure to conform is strong. You might want to develop a private signal that your teen can use to indicate that he or she is uncomfortable in a situation. This way they can "save face" and you can be the "bad guy" and order them home. Sometimes teens are grateful to have a way out where they do not have to bump up against their need to feel accepted by their peers and you will have the comfort of knowing that they have alternatives they are comfortable using when they need them.
- Define a healthy relationship with them and not for them. Help them to include words like:
- Respect - respect for their independence and choices
- Honesty
- Trust
- Compromise and negotiation
- Mutual support where neither party controls or dominates
- Validation - where each party validates the other's choices and feelings
- Define abusive relationships with them, preferably before your teen has experienced one. Be sure to include:
- Isolation
- Intimidation/Control
- "Put downs"
- Feeling like one partner is responsible for how the other partner feels.
- Physical abuse
- Emotional abuse
- Lastly, be sure to offer them the opportunity to speak with another trusted adult, like their pediatrician, if they need to.
We hope this information will help you to open up the lines of communication with your teen. Don't be afraid to make mistakes. We all do and they are rarely, if ever, fatal to your relationship!
Sources:
http://dosomething.org/tipsandtools/11-facts-about-teens-and-stds
http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Parenting/story?id=7693121&page=1
http://www.cdc.gov/std/health-disparities/age.htm
http://www.noplacelikehome.org/english.php?p=grade10&print=true
http://kidshealth.org
http://parentingteens.about.com/od/teenssex/a/talking_oralsex.htm
http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/51
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/3088174/ns/today-parenting_and_family/t/five-tips-teen-dating/
http://www.guttmacher.org/pubs/FB-ATSRH.html
http://www.guttmacher.org/pubs/FB-Teen-Sex-Ed.html
http://www.cdc.gov/Features/ChooseRespect/
http://www.thenationalcampaign.org/resources/pdf/pubs/10TipsFoster_FINAL.pdf
http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/2005-10-18-teens-sex_x.htm
http://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/teen/dating-sex/pages/Adolescent-Sexuality-Talk-the-Talk-Before-They-Walk-the-Walk.aspx
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/sex-education/CC00032/NSECTIONGROUP=2
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/parents/human-sexuality-what-children-need-know-when-they-need-know-it-4421.htm
http://www.newsweek.com/2008/07/30/talking-the-talk.print.htmlhttp://www.childrennow.org/index.php/site/content_print_template/learn/twk_sex
http://www.futureswithoutviolence.org/userfiles/file/Teens/Teens_Sept_09_FINAL.pdf |
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Looking for an Opportunity to Make a Difference? | |  Great Service Opportunity Available
"It takes a village to raise a child "(African proverb).
This statewide project was begun to support and raise awareness about the continued need for foster "nests." Do you or a member of your family belong to a service organization or youth group? Recent participating groups include Girls Scouts, church Youth Groups, religious education classes and Women's service groups. Would your group like to help support foster care and adoption and help spread the word about the need for additional homes? How can you help?
- Host a painting party as a service project (materials can be provided).
- Display finished Bird Houses & Literature about Foster Care.
- Invite the "Everyone Needs a Nest" Project to your fair, festival, tag sale, meeting or coffee hour.
- Make a donation to "Everyone Needs a Nest."
- Donate arts and crafts supplies such as paints, brushes or wooden bird houses.
- Build and donate bird houses.
By participating in this project, you become part of the village. Please contact us for more information. |
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10 Ways Parents Can Help with Job Searching | | 
by Jacquie Strawson
- Show interest in your child's job pursuits and have discussions about the fit of a particular job to your child.
- Help your child to be realistic about the commitment of a job and how to balance that with his or her other academic, extra-curricular or therapeutic obligations.
- Help your child be honest about his or her strengths and weaknesses. Discuss how your child might improve upon those weaknesses.
- Discuss legal issues about work with your child. CT Department of Labor can provide you with everything you need to know. Obtain working papers for your minor child and familiarize yourself with the laws regarding minors working.
- Assist your child in choosing an appropriate interview outfit.
- Practice interview questions with your child.
- Provide transportation to an interview, but stay out of sight!
- Review and reflect on the interview experience with your child.
- Remind your child to send a thank you note to the interviewer.
- Encourage your child to remain positive during the job searching process and keep trying!
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