Reflections Newsletter
"People are not broken and in need of fixing... most people are just fine. They may simply need a tune-up."
Dr. Alexander R. Lees
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In This Issue:
It's Spring! A time of new beginnings and trying out new stuff - so we have some interesting information about a variety of things for you.
Alex expands on the art of persuasion. Applying some of the suggestions could possibly help you to enjoy your everyday interactions with others even more. And, who wouldn't want that?!
Dave talks about recent developments in PSTEC (Percussive Suggestion Technique) and the array of issues it can help with such as eating disorders, smoking, anger and pain. As well -- how to play the stock market. That may sound strange, but it's interesting.
Susan provides an explanation of the Wood element which is most active in the Spring. Learning about how it can affect you and what to do about it, is very timely. As well, you can find out if you are a Wood person and what that means.
Tom shares an energy medicine technique with a great name - The Brazilian Toe Technique. To find out what it helps and how to do it, please read his article.
And I write about scones, specifically raspberry and white chocolate ones. Mmmm, yummy! Eating them is great, but sometimes, how you get them, is even better.
Enjoy!
Berit Lees, Editor
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How to get your kids to eat veggies...
and do other things
By Dr. Alexander R. Lees
As the response to the last article on persuasion suggests it was timely and useful, I thought I'd expand the concept a bit with more information this month. But first, let me preframe it by mentioning this: It all begins with your thoughts.
Somebody famous once said: Remember, everything begins with a thought. Every object that exists, every situation you are involved in, anything you can see, feel or talk about began with someone thinking about it, and bringing it to fruition.
To a large extent, changing your thoughts is one way to affect your emotions, and changing the way you feel about something can be very influential on the way you perceive things, which can lead to a change in attitude. This change in attitude usually affects others, who in turn will begin to treat you differently, and all this adds up to an even better and more supportive relationship for all involved.
And speaking of attitude, remember, you are only responsible for your own. You are not responsible for other people's attitude, but you can learn to influence them, which brings us right back to persuasion, that is once you have done the above, the art of persuasion becomes so much easier to learn and apply.
Now because you've read this far, allow me the pleasure of offering you one more piece from the art of persuasion.
Suppose you are working with someone else to help them to effect some change in their life, and at the same time, you realize that the change you are about to suggest is too big (for them) to deal with right now, for whatever reason.
On the other hand, you may be in negotiations with your boss, your spouse, your child, a friend or your parent(s), and based on what you know of them, you know they probably won't go for it out of hand.
This is where the art of persuasion comes in. Think of a way to chunk the request up beyond what you realistically want from the other person, and present this choice first. After they say a resounding No, then present them with a choice that is less than you asked for in the first case. More often than not, the other party will accept the second choice.
Example #1
You want to borrow $50.00 from your cheapskate brother whom you've done many a favour for in the past. You are aware he will probably say No. You then start the conversation by asking for, say, $150.00.
After some discussion, you lower the amount to $50.00 - the chance of him agreeing to this reduced amount now goes way up.
Example #2
You need to attend to a personal appointment, but your boss is the type to say No, no matter what the situation is. You might begin the negotiations with stating you need four hours off to deal with it, but during the negotiations, reduce it to one - more than enough time to handle things. Again, he/she is much more likely to accept the one hour over four, and you now can take care of business without a major confrontation.
Example #3
Your son has once again decided his sister's teddy bear makes a great dart board, especially when it evokes those squealing sound affects from his sister. You may want to deal with the issue by saying something like, "Johnny, This is very serious. You are still using your sister's teddy bear for a dartboard. Because you won't stop it, I have to take your Nintendo away for a whole week, and stop you watching your (name the TV show) for the same length of time."
After some squealing of his own, Johnny now hears, "Okay. This time, you can watch your TV show tonight, since you promised to use something else for a dartboard." (Note: We ended with what he promised to do, as opposed to what he did wrong.)
Example #4
You want the kids to begin contributing by helping to clean up the house. Start with a list for each, just beyond what you would reasonably expect them to actually do. Let them wail and whine for a moment or two, then offer a compromise in the length of the lists. More often than not, they will accept the shortened list over the longer one.
Example #5
'Susan' has decided she is now of that age where she isn't going to eat veggies any more. Once seated at the table, pick up the bowl containing the veggies, have a large spoon handy, and ask, "Do you want a large helping or a small one?" as you jester with the spoon towards the veggie dish. Now, suppose Susan is wise beyond her years, and replies, "I don't want any!" Before you consider leaving her on somebody's porch steps, become slightly firmer and ask, "Do you want to choose how much, or shall I?"
One question that may arise is: Aren't you actually manipulating the situation with the use of these kind of techniques? The answer is: Are you in fact trying to cheat someone? Are your motives immoral in some way? Are you trying to take unfair advantage?
A baseball bat can be used for destructive purposes; should we therefore ban baseball?
Seems to me those that would use these techniques unfairly don't read newsletters such as this one. So I like to assume that you will use them wisely and with integrity.
In summary, I'd like to suggest you begin to integrate these techniques by thinking of when and where you can use them ahead of time. Therefore you will be ready to go when an opportunity presents itself. You may be surprised and delighted with how much more you can accomplish by a slight adjustment in your approach.
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When Insults Had Class
These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to four letter words.
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill. "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
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 Contributing
Columnist Dave Marshall is retired and lives in Spain. Before his
retirement he was in the corporate world in the UK, and also taught NLP
(he's an NLP Master Trainer). Visit his website at www.nlpman.eu which
has a ton of free information on NLP. Dave's blog http://www.bukisa.com/rss/people/nlpman or on twitter: mynlp
Recent Developments in PSTEC
(Percussive Suggestion Technique)
By Dave Marshall
Those of you who are regular readers of Reflectionswill remember, no doubt, that back in January I wrote an article about Percussive Suggestion Technique. The response has been tremendous and the feedback incredibly positive. You may remember that this technique is being developed by an hypnotherapist called Tim Phizackerly. And since then Tim has not been idle, in fact he has made some more audio tracks for handling eating disorders, smoking, and extra click tracks as well as treatments for anger and pain.
In this package (The PSTEC Positive Click Tracks - Different
and important positive click tracks) Tim also talks about his theories of how the mind works. In particular Tim divides the mind into three parts, the conscious, subconscious and the unconscious. This is a deeper theory than previous therapies, like NLP, where the unconscious and conscious parts of the mind are only considered. Tim makes the distinction between the autonomic nervous system that runs body and organs, and is handled by the unconscious, and the subconscious which, in his view, carries out more habitual things that have been learned and become automatic. This is a very useful distinction which Tim uses in his explanation of how hypnosis works.
He says that the things that we know and call knowledge are actually beliefs, and in order to change a belief think of it like a balance which is weighed down on one side by the current beliefs and on the other side of the balance you must pile up new beliefs until the balance swings over to the new side. That is the purpose of hypnosis. Firstly you have to get passed the conscious mind so that you're talking and working with the subconscious mind. And that is why the tapping is so essential. When you listen to a click track and carry out the tapping exercise the conscious mind now becomes so tied up with concentrating on the tapping that it's as if the gatekeeper is letting you in to the subconscious, which handles decoding of language. This is the same idea as Alphabet Edit, and Richard Bandler (co-founder of NLP) also used rhythmic tapping, with alternate hands, in some of his sessions.
This enables the belief balance to be more easily loaded on the side of the new beliefs. Another reason speaking quickly on the click tracks is, again, to bypass the conscious mind and stop carrying out the logical assessments of what is being said. (By the way, I did hear that a very logical person could not listen to the click track because, "He just spoke too fast and I couldn't make sense of what he was saying...").
Another way to build up the new beliefs in the balance is to repeat things, not parrot fashion, but by saying the same thing in different ways. Tim has a wonderfully simple way of describing these things so that I would think anyone can understand what he's saying.
People are also finding new uses for the click tracks. For example Tim says " If you ever play the stock market then PSTEC can help you. I don't know anything about trading stocks and shares personally but a number of people have been using PSTEC for this purpose. PSTEC, it seems can be especially useful for traders who want to eliminate emotion from their trading decisions. This has long been a challenge for those involved in the stock market and now PSTEC provides the means."
So I suppose it stops them hanging onto a stock just because they like it. Now how could that be applied somewhere else? Clearing out the attic perhaps? Getting rid of old ideas that are no longer useful? Well that's food for thought isn't it!
A lot of people have reported using PSTEC for clearing up unwanted emotions left from old relationships and insomnia. The success stories are coming from all over, Harley Street, London, Toronto, Canada, Dallas, USA and many other places.
Read about what people having been experiencing The stories include:
- Coping with criticism and harsh judgment.
- Investor renting a property.
- Fear of making poor decisions.
There is also a forum available and plans are advancing for training courses and a certification program for therapists. As you may have gathered, I am a convert to PSTEC and I can't imagine the many ways that people will start using it to enhance their lives by the imaginative use of its methods.
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Workshop News
Fall Workshop Schedule will be announced in August.New on our Website:
 How to Help Your Immune Systemby Dr. Alexander R. Lees
The audio portion (approx. 58
mins.) is presented in simple, everyday terms and is about how the
immune system functions, what affects it performance, and what you can
do to support it. Learning how will enhance your immune system's ability
to support you!
Also included is an 11 page report
highlighting portions of the audio presentation and samples of
"tapping" sequences to use to improve your immune system, and keep it
strong and resilient.
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 Contributing Columnist Susan Stone is a licensed acupuncturist, certified in Eden Energy Medicine and Eden Energy Medicine for Women. In addition she is a Registered Bach Flower practitioner, an Acutonics practitioner, with a BS degree in Nutrition and Dietetics, and has been in private practice since 1977. Susan's other interests include a passion for dressage, mountain climbing, and life. Contact Susan at her clinic in the Boston, MA area. www.stonehealthcenter.com
Spring, the Wood Element & You
By Susan Stone
The essences of the Elements resonate from deep within ourselves. In Oriental medicine each of the organs is associated with a certain element and the elements are associated with particular functional qualities of our body, mind, spirit complex. The energy of Wood comes from the organs of Liver and Gallbladder. For more specifics about the Liver and Gallbladder please refer to April's article in Reflections.
Wood is about new beginnings, birth, the dawn of a new day. The associated direction is the East. As the sun rises in the East to herald a new day, Wood energy brings forth the creative power. Each of the Yin organs has an associated "soul" quality and the Liver's is known as the Hun. The Hun hears the "call of Soul". Soul as a co-creator with God desires to create its heart's desire. Gallbladder listens to the Liver's Hun and strives to implement the desires of Liver's creativity. This embodies the energy of Wood. This energy is represented in Spring - now is Wood's time. And don't we all feel it! We feel renewed, the greening of our environment charges us with fresh new energy - new beginnings are Wood's call to action.
You can activate your Wood energy - wear more green clothing. Energize yourself and eat more green foods. Isn't it interesting the green foods help with the detoxification of the liver and gallbladder? Green is the associated color of the Wood element.
In the Spring when the Wood energy is most active we can be thrown out of balance by the associated weather of Wood. The weather aspect of Wood is the wind. Too much wind can hurt the Liver and Gallbladder energy. Tremors in the body (internal wind) can be a sign of a deficiency of Liver energy - not enough Wood. Air conditioning is a wind generator too. Be careful not to let you body get blasted by air conditioning being directed too strongly towards your body. Strong wind can result in a disruption of the smooth flow of qi in the body, which is a function of the Liver (Wood) energy.
There is a direct correlation between our emotional states and what eventually downloads into the physical body and then later results in a physical problem. Our emotions affect the energetic condition of our organ energy and our meridian flow. Sub-optimal functioning of our meridian/organ energy results in physical ailments. The emotions of anger and frustration block the transmission of our creative self. Anger and frustration create a static interference of the Wood element. This can result in problems with the eyes. The energy of Wood reveals itself and expresses itself through the eyes. Of course we all have a genetic predisposition when it comes to our eyesight, but balanced Wood energy can help you make the most of what you've got and do much to overcoming eye problems.
Examples of Wood imbalance conditions can be: one sided or temple headaches, menstrual irregularities, PMS, digestive disturbances, low sperm count, insomnia, muscle, tendon or ligament problems, arthritis, high blood pressure, hip issues, TMJ, lumps, cyst or growths, cancer of all kinds, (esp liver or breast), chronic neck tension.
The voice of out of balance Wood energy is someone who shouts all the time or someone who has an overly soft voice. The nails reflect the Wood energy. Ridges, striations, peeling, splitting, thickening, and changes of color, spotting and blackening all indicate a problem with Wood energy.
The taste that is associated with the Wood energy is sour. Sour foods can help keep the wood energy in balance. Examples of these foods are:
Grain - wheat
Fruit - peach
Meat - chicken
Vegetable - mallow
Sour foods are: lemon, plum, grapefruit, crab apple, grapes, mango, olive, peach, raspberry, adzuki beans, tomatoes and vinegar.
Hope is the spiritual quality associated with Wood. It is linked with the Wood's capacity for vision and its orientation to the future. "Hope springs eternal". This is the power of Wood energy.
Each one of us has the qualities of one element more than another. We carry the characteristics of all the elements within us, but often times we are predominately one or two elements. Throughout our lives we can express the characteristics of the different elements. But we usually are one element more than another. Here are some of the characteristics of a Wood person:
The archetype of a Wood person is the pioneer, the warrior or commander. Wood people are natural leaders. They are bold and decisive and are good organizers and are able to find structure amongst chaos.
People who are strong in Wood energy need to move more than other elements. They find it almost impossible to sit still, and would prefer to be in motion - doing achieving, and accomplishing. Other people can find it hard to keep up with them. They seldom rest but move from one project to another. They thrive on lots of physical exercise, and if this is not possible they can get cranky.
Exercise helps keep Wood energy in balance. Problems that can come as a result of not enough exercise can be high blood pressure, muscle spasms, headaches, insomnia, emotional agitation, and fatigue. Not enough movement can result in chronic fatigue,
Fibromyalgia and MS.
The major force behind a Wood person is to expand, to grow, to create. They are strong individuals and like to do what's not been done before.
Their greatest virtue is truthfulness, honesty, and a drive to accomplish. A Wood person is strong, solid, dependable and kind. Woods can inspire others for a cause.
A Wood's greatest fault would be to lack sensitivity to others, which may result in only seeing one side of an issue. They are known to barrel ahead with tunnel vision. They can be honest to a fault and they are not so concerned about hurting someone else's feelings.
A Wood person's greatest fear is being out of control. But if a Wood person feels trapped and confined they simply change the situation, often times with little regard for other's feelings. Their greatest lesson is to learn how to relax and go with the flow. To learn to give others space if they do things differently than you do.
In Eden Energy Medicine and acupuncture there are certain treatments to help bring the Wood energy back into balance. For yourself, physical movement is best bet and to focus on what you can do and not what you can't do.
Next month I will begin talking about the Fire Element. Fire is the energy of Summer.
Resources:
Eden Energy Medicine Two Year Clinical Practicum Book - section on the Five Elements and the Human Psyche. Also, "Discovering the Five Elements" by Janice McKenzie.
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Why Dogs Bite People
Note from Berit: I'm embarrassed to admit that I wanted to buy some of these booties for Ty when we had snow last winter. Now that I see what they look like on a doggie, I have apologized to Ty for ever having had that thought! :-)
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 Contributing Columnist Tom
Dorzab is a retired biologist from Kansas and now lives with his wife
in Spain. Tom followed his passion and is now an energy medicine
practitioner specializing in Eden Energy Medicine. Contact Tom here
The Brazilian Toe TechniqueBy Tom DorzabGood health is a very complicated process, right? Wrong. We in the western world have been conditioned to think that, in order to have good health, we need to enlist the help of a caravan of specialists. We certainly can't expect to be healthy without consulting the experts, right? Not necessarily so. Primitive societies had member's where their lifespans commonly reached 120 years and more. What was their secret? Over many thousands of years, they had learned to live in harmony with nature instead of trying to control it. Sadly, even if one puts forth a herculean effort to live a more natural lifestyle, the forces acting against us today are pervasive and unavoidable at some level. Therefore, as opposed to the simplicity of maintaining good health in more primitive societies, a little extra umph is usually required today. As an Eden Energy Medicine practitioner, I tend to add a little more umph in the form of energy medicine techniques. It's true that it can be a pretty complicated process to assess the condition of the various energy systems of the body and then formulate a plan to correct the imbalances. It's also true that some very simple and effective techniques are available that will often make a huge difference without any assessments at all. The foundation of maintaining good health in the world of Eden Energy Medicine, is the daily energy routine I described in the June 2008 through October 2008 issues of this newsletter. The routine takes between 5 and 10 minutes and can correct many imbalances by itself. In addition to the Daily Routine, there are some simple techniques that can have a profoundly beneficial effect on our health. I have been experimenting with various techniques lately to help determine what they actually do. I've been doing energy assessments before and after the techniques to try and get a handle on what systems are affected by them. One of those techniques is called the Brazilian Toe Technique. The results for the techniques, including the Brazilian Toe Technique, have literally blown my socks off. Often I have found that after performing the techniques, virtually all the imbalances found during the pre-assessments have been corrected. I'm not going to promise these kinds of results to anyone, but I would expect some excellent results from the majority of people who try it.The following is a description of some of the conditions the technique is reported to relieve and then the simple directions are given to do the technique. If you want to do something very nice for someone, give it a try. You may also improve someone's health in a marked way. The Brazilian Toe Technique - What has it been known to help?- Promotes very deep relaxation and relieves insomnia/promotes sleep.
- Reduces pain, nausea, swelling, foot and leg cramps.
- Calms hyperactive children.
- Reduces the negative effects of chemotherapy and post-surgery edema (especially for mastectomies).
- Relieves restless leg syndrome and migraines.
The TechniquePractitioners first need to work the gait points on their own hands by massaging between the bones on the top of their hands from their wrists to their fingers. Then massage the fingers from the hand to the fingertips and pull the energy off each finger.- Have your client lie down with the face up.
- The practitioner stands or sits at the feet of the client so that the toes can be held comfortably without straining.
- Massage the gait reflexes on your client's feet by rubbing deeply between the bones on the tops of their feet (careful, this can be very painful for some people) from about halfway up the foot to the toes. Then massage the toes and pull the energy off each toe. Massage the entire foot paying special attention to the ankle area. Squeeze the feet.
- Place the pad of your right thumb on the pad (the bottom) of the middle toe on your client's left foot and the pad of your left thumb on the pad of your client's right middle toe. At the same time, place the pad of your right middle finger on the base of the left middle toe's toenail and the pad of your left middle finger on the base of the right middle toe's toenail. Just remember, the thumb is always on the bottom and the fingers are always on the top. Hold this position for 3 minutes.
- Then slide the thumbs of each hand to the pads of the fourth toes without losing contact with the toes (do not lift your thumbs off the body). Then change fingers and place the pads of your ring fingers at the base of the toenails on the fourth toes. Hold for 3 minutes.
- Then slide the thumbs of each hand to the pads of the fifth toes without losing contact with the toes. Then change fingers and place the pads of your little fingers at the base of the toenails on the fifth toes. Hold for 3 minutes.
- Then slide the thumbs of each hand to the pads of the second toes without losing contact with the toes. Then change fingers and place the pads of your index fingers at the base of the toenails on the second toes. Hold for 3 minutes.
- Then slide the thumbs of each hand to the pads of the big toes without losing contact with the toes. Then change fingers and place the pads of both your index and middle fingers at the base of the toenails on the big toes. Hold for 3 minutes.
- Massage the feet again and pull the energy down from the knees off the feet by lightly dragging the palms of your hands from the knees to the feet and then off the feet. Then pull the energy down the thighs off the feet. Then pull the energy down from the head off the feet. Finish by tracing figure eights above the body at least one time up and one time down.
This is so easy any first grader can do it. I'm a firm believer that all the best things in life are simple. This simple and very effective technique only lends support to my belief. Try it out and let me know how it works for you. ********************************************************************************************** ********************************************************************************************** |
Berit's Corner
I've learned to deal with many things in my life and being married to a therapist has certainly been a blessing in that regard. But, there is one thing that still bothers me once in a while and no amount of "tapping" fixes it. What's that you may ask? It's people that are unkind, unjust or just plain mean or cruel. I have an opinion on what should happen to people like that but it can't be included in this newsletter!
So, when a person does something that is very kind, supportive and/or loving I really appreciate it. Thankfully, I experience this kind of person far more often than the other kind and it's another reason I think I'm lucky and/or blessed. Lately I've had an abundance of these kind of people in my life (you know who you are!). There's one particular example I'd like to share with you. It wasn't a really big event, but it touched me deeply.
The other morning I woke up to a really rotten day. I hadn't slept well and the sky was dark and foreboding. It was also pouring rain. I had a 9:00 am appointment to get my hair cut so I had to go out. After dawdling over my coffee and the morning paper I didn't have time for breakfast. Out the door I went. Had a nice chat with my hairdresser and started to feel almost human.
As I walked out of the hairdressers I remembered that across the street was a bakery that has the most delicious raspberry and white chocolate scones. Just thinking about them made my mouth water and I thought: I've got enough time. I'll grab one and I'll feel even better. Dashed across the street and tried to open the door. That's when I noticed the sign - Closed for Renovations.
Normally, I'd say, "Darn." Not that morning! It was like the end of the world. I felt so lousy and unloved. Now, of course, I know that's an over-reaction, but I did mention that I wasn't feeling all that good that day. Well, the only thing I could do was to head home and go to work. I was now starving but didn't have the presence of mind to go and get something else. I just drove home, feeling woe is me.
I parked the car and went into my office. Sitting on my desk was a bag. I picked it up and slowly, very slowly realized what it contained. There were two raspberry and white chocolate scones AND two cinnamon ones (my other favourite).
I knew instantly who had brought them. The client that was in a session with Alex had brought them for me. He knew I loved them from a conversation we had last year when he saw Alex. The fact that he remembered and brought me some was almost over-whelming at that moment. I actually fought back tears.
It was such a simple act of kindness and generosity that I'm sure he had no idea the effect it would have on me. When he came out after his session I surprised the heck out of him with a big hug. He was a little startled but once I explained how I had been feeling that morning, a big grin appeared on his face.
What's my point in sharing this story? I think that many of us don't realize the impact our actions can have on others. Something so simple (like bringing me scones) can have a profound effect. I would bet money on the fact that there are a lot of people that could make someone's day with a like and similar gesture. Maybe you know someone you can go and see and bring them something you know they love, or covet. :-) Or, you could call, email or text someone and just say, "Hi, how's your day going?"
You'll feel good and the person on the receiving end will feel maaarvellous! Doesn't get much better than that. By the way, there's still one scone left... I'm going to enjoy it with my afternoon tea today, and maybe let Alex have a bite 'cause he likes them too. :-)
Hope you have a luscious May!
Till next month,
Take care.
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Volume 17, No. 05
May 2010
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Upcoming Workshops
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