Reflections Newsletter
"People are not broken and in need of fixing... most people are just fine. They may simply need a tune-up."
Dr. Alexander R. Lees
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In This Issue:
It's traditional for the summer time issue of Reflections to be on the lighter side, so we hope you find it amusing and interesting. Alex has written a story about Ty and his antics during the dog days of summer, David has provided us with some useful NLP language patterns that are fun to try out in your everyday conversations, as well as with your clients if you're a practitioner. Tom writes about a very interesting flight he recently had. It was not only interesting, it was also very helpful for one of his fellow passengers. I go on a rant about news reporting. But, as "rants" go, this one is pretty mellow, probably due to the wonderful summer weather we're having.
Also, our fall/winter workshop schedule is now posted on our website and in this edition of Reflections. If you want to learn "tapping" then this fall is a good time to do it!
Attention Practitioners: If you are interested in mentoring, please have a look at our new Practitioner Mentoring Group.
Enjoy!
Berit Lees, Editor
P.S. The September issue of Reflections will contain all the usual articles about tapping, NLP, book reviews, Eden Energy Medicine, and any other interesting "stuff" we think you might enjoy. There will be a special project from Tom about Eden Energy Medicine that you can participate in if you wish... but you'll have to wait until the September edition to read all about it. :-)
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The Dog Days of Summer
By Dr. Alexander R. Lees
"Your dog's depressed," said She Who Must Be Obeyed, "do something about it please." I stirred slowly because of the warmth of the day, and sneaked a peak at him. After a few seconds of observation, I decided to put my therapy hat on and really give it some serious thought. After all, the sun was beating down, and the hat just might prevent my few remaining brain cells from frying.
"Ty, come," were the first words out of my mouth. No comment. "Ty, come!" was the second attempt, only with a little more emphasis. Nothing. Not even a stir. After several more minutes devoted to deep thought, I heard a distant voice, that seemed to be calling me back from some place afar.
"You're snoring," the Voice said, "I thought you were going to help Ty."
This time, I gathered my energy and leapt off the chase lounge to deal with the problem. Well, I suppose one might refer to my movement as an uncoordinated crawl or struggle, due to the fact the sun had sapped all my strength, but none the less, I was vertical, so the end result was the same.
After some stumbling around in the bushes in the back yard, I finally located the rope with the ball on the end. After dangling it tantalizingly in front of the dog's face, I fired it off, and said, "There ya go! Go get it!"
Nothing. Not even a stir. "Hmm," I thought. "This is gonna require some deeper psychological intervention," and headed up the stairs that take forever and into the kitchen. I returned with a small piece of cheese - his favourite bribe - and let him take a sniff.
After a few seconds, as his nose relayed the information to his brain, one eye opened and slowly focused on my out stretched hand. "Now we're getting somewhere," I thought, and ever so slowly, he raised his head from the grass and licked the cheese. And then down he went again. "Hmm," thought I to myself, "this is indeed serious. That cheese should have disappeared in one chomp. We're going to have to get even more resourceful."
"He's depressed because Kaylie died," said She. "Haven't you got some technique to fix him?" Now the pressure was on; my reputation was at stake.
At the same time I resisted the impulse to yell, "Hey! Stop with the analysis, will you? That's my job. You don't see me messing with your computer answering all those emails, making appointments, cooking and involving myself with all those other things you do around here, do you?" After all, among other things, I'm a survivor, and learned a long time ago not to bring up things like that.
For those that haven't been reading Reflections all that long, I should point out the rules that govern Berit's and my relationship. We were married some 30+ years ago, and, after she spent a few days simply observing, made a proclamation. "I've decided we need to divvy everything up into two parts," she began. "I will take care of the everyday, mundane things around here, and we will save you and your energy for the big things. That way, you won't be under my feet all the time."
Well, here we are, some 30 years later, and I'm still waiting for something big to come along, so I can deal with it. After all, I'm ready.
"Given this depression business is one of those big things," my brain advised me, "Do something." I declared, "Let's go." She asked, "Where to - the vet for some doggie pills?"
After a bit of grumbling, we were all in the trusty Subaru wagon, and heading out to bush-land. I must admit, practically having to lift Ty into the vehicle did cause more concern because usually, one barely has time to swing the rear hatch up and out of the way, before he's sailing through the air towards it. I swear, one of these days his timing will be out by a half a second or so, and he and that door are going to get to know each other really well.
"Everyone out," I declared as I maneuvered the car onto the open field and shut down the engine near the creek. After some coaxing, Mr. Ty condescended to hop down, and trudged beside us along the trail. This unto itself was also bad news; normally he exits the vehicle before the hatch is fully open, and is gone by the time we've locked the car. Now he was staying within a few feet of us, head down, and his curly Chow-like tail dragging behind.
Suddenly it was as if someone put a new battery in him, or had lit his tail on fire. There was a yelp, a leap, and he was into and through the creek and over the bank before one could say, "What the heck happened?"
"Oh, you wonderful, clever man," She declared with an excited smile. "You fixed him, didn't you?" Now, although I have a reputation to maintain, I felt it would be better to answer truthfully when She repeated, "You fixed him didn't you? How did you do that? What did you do?"
"Rabbits," I said.
So Ty is back to his normal aloof self, except when he anticipates a rabbit coming within smelling distance, swimming after a duck for as long as 30 minutes or so without even getting near it, or waiting patiently for a scrap of food to fall to the kitchen floor whenever food is prepared. All this, of course, makes Berit happy, and I'm happy because nobody is bugging me whilst I catch up on my lounge chair time in the sun.
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Weather Forecast - the Australian Way
It was April and the Aboriginals in a remote part of Northern Australia asked their new elder if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild. Since he was an elder in a modern community he had never been taught the old secrets. When he looked at the sky he couldn't tell what the winter was going to be like.
Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he told his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the tribe should collect firewood to be prepared. But being a practical leader, after several days he had an idea. He walked out to the telephone booth on the highway, called the Bureau of Meteorology and asked, 'Is the coming winter in this area going to be cold?' The meteorologist responded, 'It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold.'
So the elder went back to his people and told them to collect even more wood in order to be prepared. A week later he called the Bureau of Meteorology again. 'Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?' The meteorologist again replied, 'Yes, it's going to be a very cold winter.' The elder again went back to his community and ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find.
Two weeks later the elder called the Bureau again. 'Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?' he asked. 'Absolutely,' the man replied. 'It's looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters ever.' 'How can you be so sure?' the elder asked. The weatherman replied, 'Our satellites have reported that the Aboriginals in the north are collecting firewood like crazy, and that's always a sure sign.'
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 Contributing
Columnist Dave Marshall is retired and lives in Spain. Before his
retirement he was in the corporate world in the UK, and also taught NLP
(he's an NLP Master Trainer). Visit his website at www.nlpman.eu which
has a ton of free information on NLP. Dave has also joined the world of blogs, check his out at http://www.bukisa.com/search?Q=nlpman (you may have to copy and paste URL into your browser).
Playing with Hypnotic Language Patterns on a Summer's Day
By David Marshall
Here is something for you to study during the summer months. See what happens when you string together some of these types of phrases by putting them (appropriately) into your everyday conversations. Also, you could try them with your clients (if you are a therapist/counsellor) and you will notice how much more effective your sessions can become.
Causal Modelling, or Linkage - occurs when words are used that imply a cause/effect relationship exists between things that are happening. The listener will tend to respond as if one thing did cause the other thing to happen.
There are three categories of linkage:
Causality Statements - This is the strongest kind of linkage. Use words such as makes, causes, forces, means, requires.
Example:
"Becoming aware of the sensations in your hands means that you can start to notice that one hand seems lighter, or heavier than the other."
"Deep relaxation causes your breathing to slow down."
"To not close your eyes requires a lot of concentration."
Time Connection - use words like as, when, during, while, to establish a connection in time between things that are currently happening. (e. g. pacing current experience).
Example:
"As you hear the sounds around you, you can begin to feel more comfortable."
"While you are tapping your foot, you can become more relaxed."
Simple Conjunctions - uses and.
Examples:
"You are sitting here and you are wondering..."
"You can hear my voice and notice how curious you are becoming..."
When using linkages the speaker starts with something that is happening and joins it to something they want to happen. This approach is most effective when you start with the Simple conjunctions (least effective) and move gracefully through Time connections to Causality statements (the strongest).
Example:
"So you are reading these words and beginning to feel easier about things, and as you notice the whiteness of the paper that these words are written on, you can become more interested in the way we use our language, and that means that things are becoming easier for you to understand, as time passes by."
Mind Reading - using suitable generalisations, and acting as if you know what the other person is thinking, can build the credibility of the hypnotherapist or counsellor..
Example:
"You may be wondering what we are going to be doing?"
"So I can tell that you have got something to sort out."
"And I know that things haven't always been easy for you."
Lost Performative - uses statements that make some kind of evaluation, or value judgement where the performer of the judgement is absent (lost). Such statements can be used to preface or "pack" presuppositions.
Example:
"It"s good to realise that these things can be solved." (Which things?)
"It"s easier to do when you are relaxed." (What is easier to do?)
Limits of model of the world
Universal Quantifiers - used to overgeneralise, enabling the listener to carry out their own interpretation, within the limits of their model of the world.
Example:
"Everyone knows their own special way of relaxing."
"You can go all the way down."
"All the things that you remember are somehow connected."
Model Operators of possibility and necessity - indicate aspects of choice, the existence, or absence, of choice.
Example:
"Have you noticed that you can't keep your eyes open?"
"You could begin to see new choices."
"But you must not come back to now until you are ready."
"You ought to be able to do it now."
"Your hands should start feel lighter now."
When you can just put together phrases that use these structures, that are in keeping with the context with in which you are dealing (be it tapping/EFT or buying a car) you will begin to notice that surprising things can start to happen.
Just imagine if you are buying a car and you say to the seller something like ".... and as you can hear the traffic driving by, on the road, prices, as everyone knows, are really low, aren't they?"
"Someone said to me only the other day 'You can always get a bargain at XXX cars and I did not know that you give such big discounts,' I find that when you are confused and somebody says it's OK, that makes it all right and that means you have got another satisfied client..."
Oh, what fun you could have!! See the videos of the all time expert Derren Brown on YouTube and you will understand what I mean. There are a lot more and remember, he is an expert, and it's done for TV!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Vz_YTNLn6w - you may have to cut and paste this into your browser search bar.
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 Contributing Columnist Tom
Dorzab is a retired biologist from Kansas and now lives with his wife
in Spain. Tom followed his passion and is now an energy medicine
practitioner specializing in Eden Energy Medicine. You can contact Tom
at tdorz@telefonica.net Sky High Adventures with Lasers & Tapping
By Tom Dorzab
As promised, I would like to swerve
away this month from the usual format of this newsletter, namely, how
to make you feel better with energy and/or psychology medicine
techniques. Instead, I want to share a story of a real life adventure I
had earlier this year while on a plane travelling to the US of A. One
of the great things about energy medicine, especially Eden Energy
Medicine, is that there are many options one can take that are
decidedly non-technical. That is, with a magnet and a crystal, you can
almost always do pretty much anything you need to do concerning
balancing energy systems. The thing is, I love to play, so I have been
experimenting with a few more toys, with excellent results I might add.
My favourite new toy is a small cosmetic laser that is great for
stimulating specific points quickly. I still prefer to stimulate the
acupressure points with my fingers (it just plain feels better) under
normal circumstances. When I'm pressed for time though, I always reach
for the lasers.
This brings us to the case in point.
I had a great opportunity to use my trusty lasers on a recent plane
trip. Appropriately, I was on my way to attend two advanced classes in
Eden Energy Medicine (and what amazing classes they were). It all
started innocently enough. We had just settled down for the long ride
from Madrid, Spain to Philadelphia. This was a somewhat unusual trip
already, since there were many vacant seats in the front of the plane.
After reaching altitude, we were told that anyone who wanted to change
seats was welcome to do so. Since my legs tend to be very cramped in
airplane seating, I took advantage of the opportunity to spread out a
bit.
In my new neighbourhood, there was a
lady in the two seats just in front of mine; a man in the seat just in
front and across the aisle and a woman occupied the four seats directly
across the aisle from me. I had two seats to myself. I began busying
myself with my reading and movie watching and soon the boredom of the
flight set in.
Suddenly I began noticing a lot of
activity around the seat immediately in front of mine. Flight
attendants came and went carrying water, wet towels, ice and who knows
what else. As I removed my headphones and disengaged from the featured
movie, the picture became clearer. It appeared that the woman in the
seat ahead of me was in some kind of distress and that in spite of all
that the flight attendants had done, she was obviously not feeling any
better. I assumed that I would be able to help this distressed woman in
some way after all my training to become a certified Eden Energy
Medicine practitioner. But I have been in similar situations before and
have been politely pushed aside even before I could pull out my drums
and rattles (just kidding). It seems that not everyone is ready to
embrace healing modalities with a 5,000 year proven track record. Maybe
after a few more studies. Anyyway, I was determined to at least offer
my services and informed the flight attendants that I was a certified
energy medicine practitioner and that I might be able to help. I told
them I would be happy to help in any way I could. Then I waited for
their gentle push.
To my great surprise, they said
"Anything you could do would be greatly appreciated!" Hallelujah!
Apparently the plane was high enough that my angel's influence was
strong enough to pull this thing off. I grabbed my lasers and quickly
moved into the seat next to her. She told me that she was very hot and
I noticed she was perspiring profusely. She was dizzy, very pale, had a
headache and couldn't seem to think too clearly. I quickly used my
lasers to balance several meridians that I suspected would be affected.
In a few minutes she was feeling a little better. Her clouded thinking
seemed to be clearing a bit and I asked her if she had eaten anything
recently suspecting a possible allergic reaction.
She answered that she had just eaten
a tangerine. I found a piece of the peel and used it, along with a
sensitivity correction technique, to desensitize her to the tangerine.
All this took less than 10 minutes with the flight attendants and other
passengers looking on skeptically. To everyone's amazement, the woman
said she was feeling much better now! With the crisis apparently
abated, the woman and the flight attendants began with the questions.
What did you do? Where did you learn how to do that? Is this some kind
if magic or voodoo? It can't really happen like that, can it?
Here we go! This is the dream of
every energy medicine practitioner! A live audience that actually wants
to hear an explanation of what energy medicine is and no tar and
feathers in sight! And I didn't even have to chase them around while
trying to explain. Needless to say, they were all amazed and listened
intently to everything I had to say. After all, the proof is in the
pudding and they all had a big bowlful. They even wanted to know if I
gave workshops in Philadelphia! Of course I said "I never have, but I
could". After teaching them a few useful techniques, they went back to
work and I continued talking with the much relieved woman. Before all
was said and done, I had taught her the basics of Tapping and some Eden
Energy Medicine emotional release techniques. We probably went through
twenty rounds of tapping and also held our neurovascular points. I then
taught her some easy ways to calm her Triple Warmer meridian and other
assorted techniques I thought she might need. She felt like she had
just struck gold. I have to admit, in the long run, it's probably
better than gold.
Next, one of the other passengers
who had overheard the whole thing began asking questions. We got rid of
a chronic pain that had been bothering him for years and did a few
rounds of tapping to boot. I gave him some web addresses so he could do
some further searching and eventually went back to my seat. I missed
the movie, but the real events were much more interesting. The only
thing I like more than talking about energy medicine, is practicing
energy medicine.
The paradigm of energy medicine is
difficult for many people to grasp. About the only way they can accept
it is with the kind of proof the people on the plane got. Even then
many refuse to accept the possibility that something so simple could
possibly have such a profound positive effect. I'm grateful for the
opportunity to explain some of the principles and techniques to a group
of people who are genuinely interested. Thank you all!
Now we need to concentrate on energy
medicine training for all the flight attendants, policemen, firemen,
emergency workers, disaster relief workers and anybody else who may be
in a position to help other people. That way I can sit back and watch
my movie.
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Why Boys Need Moms
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Berit's Corner
We have been blessed with incredible weather for the past two months! Normally, June and July are on the cool side and we have lots of rain. To have the temperature hover in the 25 to 35 degree Celsius range (80 to 95 F) is really quite amazing. I'm sitting on our back deck with a clear blue sky, brilliant sunshine, and a gentle breeze, and I just tuned into the fact I'm thinking of dead people!
What am I doing that for? One possibility could be that many people are dying (all over the world, in a variety of ways) such as suicide bombers in Indonesia and Iraq, protesters in Iran and China, airplanes dropping out of the sky, as well as a number of well known people, and the daily news is providing non-stop coverage of the carnage.
I use the word "carnage" because it's applicable to most of the descriptions of the death and dying that's happening. For example, the death of Michael Jackson. Not since the death of Princess Diana have we been subjected to such relentless, world wide news coverage. Although the focus in the beginning included the positive and good things accomplished by both Princess Diana and Michael Jackson, it quickly turned into dissecting their lives and the carnage that ensued.
I, for one, am fed up with the constant and continuing coverage! Does anyone else feel the same as I do? I keep wondering what need is being fulfilled that the producers of the news feel it necessary to bombard us with all the sordid details? I am at the point of throwing something at the TV - yelling at it isn't working any more. :-)
Then something happened. Walter Cronkite passed away at the age of 92. For those of you not familiar with him or too young to remember him - Walter Cronkite was a world renowned reporter and journalist. He started his career as a reporter during the second world war and went on to cover every major world event in the last 50 years of the 20th century. He was also the anchorman for the CBS Evening News from 1962 to 1981. Many called him "the most trusted man in America."
The tone, substance and style (in all media) of reporting the news changed. Granted the two men (Michael Jackson and Walter Cronkite) were as different as could be, and it would have been silly to report on their deaths in the same way. But, the one factor that stood out for me regarding the difference in the reporting was the respect everyone had for Walter Cronkite, the man. The respect shown had nothing to do with his wealth, who he was married to, or his family. It had to do with who the man was and his great accomplishments. Walter Cronkite was a genuinely nice man; a man of character, substance and accomplishment. The news reporting was truly a celebration of his life!
So, as I sit here on this glorious sunny day I realize I've not really been thinking of death and dying. I am thinking about a man that lived the best possible life, doing what he loved, and loved doing it. He was a fortunate man indeed!
How many of us are doing what we love, and love doing it? Are some of us thinking, "When _____ happens, I'll be happy." Or, "If _____ happens, my life will be better." Or, "If only _____ happened, everything will be OK."
How many of us are truly living in the moment? How many of us are experiencing now and loving it? Our lives are lived moment to moment. The moments add up to hours, then days, weeks, months and years. And, before we know it, we'll have lived our life - wonders, warts and all.
Sitting here on this warm and sunny day, I'm loving every moment. I'm doing something I love doing - talking to you nice folks - and thinking about Walter Cronkite. He was a good man and I believe he lived his life to the fullest. I want to do the same, starting with this moment.
I'm going to walk over and rub Ty's ears and give him a back rub. It will make him feel good, and I love doing it. Conversely, he will love it and I will feel good doing it. What could you do, right this moment to make yourself (or another) feel good and love doing it? I'm sure you'll think of something!
Have a happy August!
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Volume 16, No. 08
August 2009
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Upcoming Workshops
NEW
Practitioner Mentoring Group
Details
EFT
- Fundamentals
Sept. 26, 2009
Learn More
Register
EFT - Advanced
Oct. 3 & 4, 2009
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Register
EFT
- Intermediate
Oct. 24 & 25, 2009
Learn More
EFT
Practitioner
NEW Workshop
January 2010
Date to be announced.
Learn More
For
details on our
Certified Practitioner
Program click here
Fees, Location & Other Registration Information
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NEW
Practitioner Mentoring Group
Be the best practitioner you can be! Learn new skills & techniques to complement your tapping skills with Dr. Alex Lees (in private practice 22 years & Berit Lees (22 years managing the business side of things). Share your experiences with others, learn new information, and also get help with your specific issues. Limited class size provides individualized attention. Details
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