| Upcoming Speaking Engagements |
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May 14
11:45 - 1:15
What Kids Need from Us Now: Listening & Respect
2:30 - 4:00
Helping Kids Become Responsible: Supporting without Rescuing
Palo Alto Community Child Care
Palo Alto, California
June 21
5:30 p.m.
The Myths & Realities of Happiness: At Work, At Home and In Life
New Hanover Regional Medical Center, Wilmington, NC
Interested in booking Fran to speak to your group?
Email Fran or call her at 763-1888 ext. 17. |
Fran Completes Advanced Training Program |
Fran & Dr. William Glasser, Creator of Choice Theory and Reality Therapy
February 2010, Los Angeles
After completing a two-year advanced training program with the William Glasser Institute, Fran can now add Reality Therapy/Choice Theory to her list of certifications.
Watch for more information from Fran about upcoming
Choice Theory workshops offered at the Today Coaching Training Center.
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One Workshop Participant Says . . . |
"This workshop provided an opportunity to step away from my responsibilities to reconsider my priorities. It gave me tools to address the obstacles I face and an awareness of the power and freedom I have despite the often overwhelming realities of my current situation. I feel refreshed, strengthened and renewed."
Beth
January 2010 |
| Is Coaching for YOU? |
Contact Fran for a Free Consultation to see how Coaching can work for you! |
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Fran's Favorites |
The Greater Good Science Center is an interdisciplinary research center devoted to the scientific understanding of happy and compassionate individuals, strong social bonds, and altruistic behavior. While serving the traditional tasks of a UC Berkeley research center-fostering groundbreaking scientific discoveries-the GGSC is unique in its commitment to helping people apply scientific research to their lives.
The Partnership for a Drug-Free America is a nonprofit organization that unites parents, renowned scientists and communications professionals to help families raise healthy children. The Partnership motivates & helps parents guide their children away from using drugs and alcohol, and to find assistance and treatment for family and friends in trouble.
For support for parents and adults with ADHD, a great place to connect with others who understand.
For health & fitness, check out the classes offered by Shawn Manning, undoubtedly the best fitness instructor in the area - for real! You can check out my own testimonny on her website.
For books, a moment to slow down, a cup of tea, and a chat with Kathleen Jewell, physician, book store owner and person extraordinaire.
For the best info, tips and calendar of events for parents of tots, kids, 'tweens & teens.
Join the YWCA in making a difference! Great programs for all ages. |
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Greetings!
In my talks, workshops and one-on-one coaching programs I often share my thoughts on respect and the benefits of thinking the best of others as well as ourselves. This little parable from The Art of Possibility by Zander and Zander says it better than I can. I hope you enjoy it.
A monastery has fallen on hard times. It was once part of a great order which, as a result of religious persecution in the seventeenth and eighteenth centuries, lost all its branches. It was decimated to the extent that there were only five monks left in the mother house: the Abbot and four others, all of whom were over seventy. Clearly it was a dying order.
Deep in the woods surrounding the monastery was a little hut that the Rabbi from a nearby town occasionally used for a hermitage. One day, it occurred to the Abbot to visit the hermitage to see if the Rabbi could offer any advice that might save the monastery. The Rabbi welcomed the Abbot and commiserated. "I know how it is," he said, "the spirit has gone out of people. Almost no one comes to the synagogue anymore." So the old Rabbi and the old Abbot wept together, and they read parts of the Torah and spoke quietly of deep things.
The time came when the Abbot had to leave. They embraced. "It has been wonderful being with you," said the Abbot, "but I have failed in my purpose for coming. Have you no piece of advice that might save the monastery?" "No, I am sorry," the Rabbi responded, "I have no advice to give. The only thing I can tell you is that the Messiah is one of you."
When the other monks heard the Rabbi's words, they wondered what possible significance they might have. "The Messiah is one of us? One of us, here, at the monastery? Do you suppose he meant the Abbot? Of course - it must be the Abbot, who has been our leader for so long. On the other hand, he might have meant Brother Thomas, who is certainly a holy man. Or could he have meant Brother Elrod, who is so crotchety? But then Elrod is very wise. Surely, he could not have meant Brother Phillip - he's to passive. But then, magically, he's always there when you need him. Of course, he didn't mean me - yet supposing he did? Oh Lord, not me - yet supposing he did? Oh Lord, not me! I couldn't mean that much to you, could I?
As they contemplated in this manner, the old monks began to treat each other with extraordinary repect, on the off chance that one of them might be the Messiah. On on the off chance that each monk himself might be the Messiah, they began to treat themselves with extraordinary respect.
Because the forest in which it was situated was beautiful, people occasionally came to visit the monastery, to picnic or to wander along the old paths, most of which led to the delapidated chapel. They sensed the aura of extraordinary respect that surrounded the five old monks, permeating the atmosphere. They bgan to come more frequently, bringing their friends, and their friends brought friends. Some of the younger men who came to visit began to engage in conversation with the monks. After a while, one asked if he might join. Then another, and another. Within a few years, the monastery became once again a thriving order, and - thanks to the Rabbi's gift - a vibrant authentic community of light and love for the whole realm.
A special thanks to my dear friend, Susan Roscher, for recommending the book from which this parable was taken! |
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Is Your Child Getting Enough Sleep? |
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Startling data from the new book Nurture Shock by Bronson & Merryman:
7,000 high schoolers in Minnesota were surveyed about their sleep habits and grades. Results: Teens who received A's averaged about fifteen more minutes sleep than the B students, who in turn averaged fifteen more minutes than the C's, and so on. What do we need to know? Every fifteen minutes of sleep count.
Virtually all young children are allowed to stay up later on weekends. They don't get less sleep, and they're not sleep deprived - they merely shift their sleep to later at night on Fridays and Saturdays. This sleep shift factor alone is correlated with performance on a standardized IQ test. Every hour of weekend shift costs a child seven points on the test.
Sleep loss impairs a child's brain. Tired children can't remember what they just learned, for instance, because neurons lose their plasticity, becoming incapable of forming the new synaptic connnections necessary to encode a memory.
Can lack of sufficient sleep cause children to be inattentive in class? Sleep loss debilitates the body's ability to extract glucose from the bloodstream. Without this stream of basic energy, one part of the brain suffers more than the rest - the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for what's called "Executive Function." Among these executive functions are the orchestration of thoughts to fulfill a goal, prediction of outcomes, and perceiving consequences of actions. So, tired peple have difficulty with impulse control, and their abstract goals, like studying, take a back seat to more entertaining diversions. A tired brain gets stuck on a wrong answer and can't come up with a more creative solution,
repeatedly returning to the same answer it already knows is erroneous.
According to a national study, sleep decreases each year during high school. In their first year, 60% of kids got at least eight hours on average. By the second year, that was down to 30%. Right alongside this decline went their moods; dropping below eight hours doubled the rate of clinical-level depression with over 1/8 of the students reaching this classification.
On average, children who sleep less are fatter than children who sleep more. Kids who get less than eight hours sleep have about a 300% higher rate of obesity than those who get a full ten hours of sleep. The odds of obesity go up 80% for each hour of lost sleep.
For specifics about these findings check out Nuture Shock: New Thinking about Children by Bronson & Merryman |
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Does your child need a little help in finding the right friends? |
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Check out Fran's Positive Parenting column in
the March issue of Wilmington Parent Magazine and learn how to help your child assess what to look for in a friend and how to expand his or her social network. Find it on newsstands at your local grocery store.
If you have questions you'd like answered in the 'Positive Parenting' column , send Fran an email. Look forward to hearing from you!
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Dedicated to supporting clients who want more success in life and relationships.
Fran Rudolph, M.A.
Certified Family & Life Coach
Tel. 910-763-1888 ext. 17
Fax 910-763-3311 |
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