NBA coaching great and Positive Coaching Alliance National Spokesperson Phil Jackson.

Listen to Phil Jackson Podcast

Brenda Ueland penned one of the most important essays on relationships ever written, Tell Me More. "When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand. Ideas actually begin to grow within us and come to life."
 

Make it obvious to your child that you are paying attention through use of nonverbal actions such as making eye contact and nodding your head.

Ueland again: "Who are the people, for example, to whom you go for advice? Not to the hard, practical ones who can tell you exactly what to do, but to the listeners; that is, the kindest, least censorious, least bossy people that you know. It is because by pouring out your problem to them, you then know what to do about it yourself."

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Here's Hall-of-Fame pitcher Nolan Ryan (quoted in Mind Gym by Gary Mack): "The night before a game I lie down, close my eyes, relax my body, and prepare myself for the game. I go through the entire lineup of the other team, one batter at a time. I visualize exactly how I am going to pitch to each hitter and I see and feel myself throwing exactly the pitches that I want to throw. Before I ever begin to warm up at the ballpark, I've faced all of the opposition's hitters four times and I've gotten my body ready for exactly what it is I want to do."

 

Nolan Ryan probably didn't start out by visualizing an entire game. Start with the beginning of the competition and see yourself doing what you want to do. Then pick out some challenging situations and see yourself successfully doing what you want.