Connector -- February 24, 2009 |
| In This Issue:
National Conversation on Good Coaching Case Study #11: "Working" The Refs
Liberty Mutual Responsible Sports Blog by Jim Thompson: The Envelope, Please
Excerpt from Jim Thompson's Positive Sports Parenting: What Parents Say and How Parents Act |
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| National Conversation on Good Coaching #11: "Working" The Refs |
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We enjoyed terrific responses to our previous Good Coaching Case Study, titled "When Nice Is Not Enough." Many of you voiced strong, articulate opinions with a wide range of emphasis on winning and some very nuanced and innovative ways to approach your children's coaches. To read all the comments, click here.
Now, consider our next Case Study:
"Working" The Refs
In an intense regular season game, your child's coach is "working" the refs for calls
in an increasingly loud, aggressive manner, though without foul language or personal
attacks. Your interpretation of the body language of your child's teammates indicates
to you that they are uncomfortable, and at one point your child makes eye contact
with you, seemingly embarrassed by the coach's behavior.
- What, if anything, do you do?
- Do you say anything to the coach?
- If so, when and how do you bring up the subject?
- When and how do you address this situation with your child?
Thanks as always to our co-conveners who distribute Case Studies through their websites, e-mail newsletters and publications, making this a true National Conversation on Coaching:
American Medical Society for Sports Medicine
American Youth Soccer Organization
Institute for International Sport
Little League International
Michigan State University's Institute for the Study of Youth Sports
National Association for Sport and Physical Education
National Federation of State High School Associations
Pop Warner Little Scholars, Inc.
USA Volleyball
USA Water Polo
US Lacrosse
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| Liberty Mutual Responsible Sports Blog by Jim Thompson: The Envelope, Please |
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 Stimulated by the Oscars, here are some of my favorite sports movies, perfect for starting great conversations with youth athletes.
"Chariots of Fire." No better film to talk about commitment and character. "Where does the power come from to see the race through to its end?" ("From within!")
"Searching for Bobby Fischer." Best youth sports film ever -- just substitute whatever sport your child plays for chess.
"Without Limits." Oregon runner Steve Prefontaine always gave his all. Coach Bill Bowerman's eulogy for Pre is powerful. "I always thought the purpose of a race was to win. Pre taught me I was wrong."
"Gandhi." A stretch perhaps, but I used the scene of Gandhi getting knocked down by the police to explore with my players what makes someone a "winner." (A winner is someone who gets back up!)
"A League of Their Own." Notice how Tom Hanks got better results when he became positive!
Now it's your turn. What do you think about these films? Do you have others that lend themselves to talking to your players about sports and life?
-- Jim Thompson, PCA Founder and Executive Director |
| Excerpt from Jim Thompson's Positive Sports Parenting: What Parents Say and How Parents Act |
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What Parents Say
In hundreds of workshops, we have learned that most parents have similar hopes and goals for their athletes: physical fitness, having fun, making friends, increased self-confidence, and learning life lessons.
A father once gave all 100 points to having fun because he said that all the other benefits become possible if his child sticks with sports. And if he is having fun, he'll keep coming back. If it stops being fun, he won't continue and the many benefits listed here will be lost.
Many parents resonate with the goal of learning to deal with defeat without becoming defeated. I've heard moving testimonials about parents rebounding from failure in their jobs to ultimately experience success. People nod their heads when I note that it's hard to learn how to bounce back from defeat if you don't experience defeat.
Rarely do parents give many points to winning. In the low-key atmosphere of a classroom or cafeteria, winning doesn't get much respect.
How Parents Act
Then comes the moment of revelation. We say to the parents, "You've given most of your points to these wonderful benefits of youth sports. But what happens when you go to a youth sports competition? All but one of these items goes out the window. Which one seems to get all 100 points if we look at the way parents act on the sidelines?"
This leads to sheepish expressions because we all have acted in conflict with our goals and made winning the be-all and end-all of youth sports.
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Positive Coaching Alliance
www.PositiveCoach.org
Toll Free: 866-725-0024
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Following is an excerpt from Jim Thompson's 