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I'm Fine, Thank You
 How many times in your life have you used that line? What is it about our society--and about us--that doesn't want to admit we hurt?
What have we been taught about grief? Well here's one: "Laugh, and the world laughs with you; cry and you cry alone." Wow. Who wants to cry alone!
But when you hurt, you might cry. You might also find yourself battling other symptoms of grief such as lack of concentration, a sense of numbness, disrupted sleep, changed eating habits, and a roller coaster ride of emotions.
Grief comes to all of us and all of us grieve losses both big and small. Grief is a normal and natural emotional response to loss of any kind. It is conflicting feelings about the end of, or change in, something. And we certainly live in a world full of change.
In fact, experts have identified over 40 different kinds of loss. It's important to note that loss doesn't always mean the loss of a person. It could be the loss of a career, loss of our health, loss of a friendship, loss of a dream, or even the loss of trust in God.
Yet, when we experience loss we aren't prepared to deal with it. Neither are those around us. They love us and want to help, but they're unsure of what to say. Life doesn't teach us how to heal broken hearts.
So here are a few things NOT to say to someone who is grieving:
- You'll be fine; just keep busy and give it some time.
- I know just how you feel.
- Look on the bright side; at least they're in a better place.
- You shouldn't be angry with God.
- You should be over this by now; let's go have some fun.
Here are some things you CAN say or do to help someone in pain:
- Every relationship is unique; therefore, every grief is unique. You cannot know how someone feels, so say, "I can't imagine how you feel," or "I can't imagine how painful/devastating that must have been for you."
- Ask the person, "What happened?" Most people avoid this question and pretend nothing is wrong, but people who have suffered a loss often feel isolated and want to talk about it.
- Listen with your heart, not your head. Likewise, respond with your heart, not your head. (Remember, they don't have a broken brain; they have a broken heart.)
- Don't be afraid to cry with someone while you are listening to their story.
Friends, there is One who is not a stranger to grief and he is not afraid of it either. Scripture says he is "...a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief." He is the God of the brokenhearted, who not only understands our grief and sorrows but carries them to the cross with him. "Surely he took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows..." Isaiah 53
What does that all mean? We will discuss grief and loss on Monday night. We also begin our Healing from Loss 12-session workshop in October. You will find the information below. I invite you to consider taking part in this workshop.
I hope to see you on Monday for this important discussion.
Greg
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Monday, September 24: Monday Night Class
Grief, Loss, and Where Are You, Lord? Greg teaches; come ready to discuss. We meet at Peace Lutheran Church, 18265 N 89th Ave., Peoria. Bring a dish and join us for Soup & Salad potluck beginning at 6:30 PM. Class starts at 7:15 PM.
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ON-GOING MINISTRIES
Healing from Loss
A Plan of Recovery from Grief, Loss and Broken Relationships Begins October 9th, 2012Tuesday Evenings, 7:00 PM
Peace Lutheran Church
If you have experienced loss or grief in your life and could use help to move beyond the pain, prayerfully consider being a part of this workshop. This 12-session recovery workshop is not a grief support group. Instead, it provides a step-by-step action plan that includes reading, personal reflection, homework and weekly participation. Take concrete steps to help you heal from a broken heart and reclaim your life. The next workshop will be October 9 - December 11, 2012. It will also include a Start-Up session on Saturday, October 13, 9:30 AM - 3:00 PM. All classes are held at the Peace Lutheran Church Library. Call Greg if you'd like to discuss the workshop or wish to sign up: 602-622-1488.
 DivorceCare: NEW NIGHT AND LOCATION! Now on TUESDAY Evenings, 6:30 PM
Community Church of Joy - Meet in the Church Lobby 21000 N 75th Ave, Glendale Isn't it time? Whether you have gone through a divorce recently or have difficulty picking up the pieces from a past divorce, come for this series of videos that can provide insights into getting through major issues of divorce and moving forward with your life. This is a safe, small group setting with others who have gone through the same thing. Call Jerry for more info at 623-972-7651.
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