Don't Forget to Hate Your Family This WeekYou may know by now that I'm a huge advocate for Christians doing family worship every evening. In our .W Church, family worship time is
the primary worship of the church, where the weekly Scripture and hymn are practiced, our prayer life matures nightly, and we hold each other accountable for growing in the Works of Mercy and Piety.
But let's make sure we're working with the Bible's (re)definition of the word, "family." Otherwise, as Jesus notes again and again in the Scripture, we're likely to place biological family
over family in Christ and to (mis)align our relationships accordingly.
The early church confused everyone brilliantly by noting that when husband and wife come to Christ, they remain husband and wife
but only secondarily. Primarily, they now become brother and sister in Christ and ought to treat each other accordingly - namely, as first belonging to Christ and his purposes and only secondarily to each other and their own purposes.
Same with parents and children. Yes, parents are still parents and children and still children in Christ. But - astonishingly - father and son are now brothers, and mother and daughter are sisters. It's not the relationship in Christ that is secondary but the biological one.
Secondary doesn't mean unimportant, but it does mean
secondary. And secondary does not mean we neglect our children for the sake of our ministry. But as
theologian Karl Barth notes, it
does mean that biological family considerations can't prevent us from attending to the considerations of our redefined family in Christ:
The strangest possible expression is used in Lk. 14:26 : " If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple." Hate? It is not the persons that are to be hated, for why should they be excluded from the command to love our neighbors ? It is the hold which these persons have and by which they themselves are also gripped. It is the concentration of neighborly love on these persons, which really means its denial. It is the indolent peace of a clannish warmth in relation to these persons, with its necessary implication of cold war against all others. The coming of the kingdom of God means an end of the absolute of family no less than that of possession and fame.
The biological family is often our "Get out of jail free card" when it comes to our responsibilities to our kingdom family. How sad. When we train (nightly) our biological family to together love and embrace and be redefined -
and relativized - by Christ's kingdom family, our children receive in return the most amazing elder brothers and sisters from whom they can learn Christ and by whom they can receive his love.