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Dealing with Holiday Stress
It's hard to believe the holidays are upon us! The best way that we have found to combat holiday stress is to sit down with your partner and together think through what the demands of the holidays with be for each of you and make a plan together as to how you will be dealing with that stress.
First, what holiday stresses will you each be experiencing? They will be different, because you each are different! Will you be traveling? Visiting family or in-laws? Cooking dinner and having lots of people in your home? Talk to each other, maybe even dialogue about what stresses you out during the holidays. Next, together come up with a plan which will help you combat those stresses.
Carrie and I will be traveling for both the holidays to see elderly relatives. Thanksgiving will be in Connecticut with my 93 year old mother and 90 year old aunt, and Christmas will be in Florida with her 87 year old mother and 93 year old step-dad. While we are looking forward to enjoying time with them, we know that it will be stressful figuring out dinner plans, transportation and paying attention to everyone.
We have talked about the challenges for each of us in the different scenarios. Let's face it, it's usually more stressful when we are with our own family, as opposed to our partner's family! Because we are both so responsible and responsive to our elderly parents' needs, we have decided that we need to carve out some time to have some fun while we are away, in order to combat some of the stress.
We have actually written down and scheduled some fun things to do while away, just the two of us-- a movie and dinner at a favorite restaurant, Christmas shopping in a fun New England town, hiking and possibly sea kayaking in Florida. Since we are fun-challenged anyway, this is especially important, not only for our relationship, but for us to be able to enjoy our time with our families.
By telling your partner what will be most stressful for you over the holidays and coming up with a plan together of how to deal with that stress, it makes life easier. The holidays and family can throw whatever stress they want at you both, but if you are on the same team, not on competing opposite teams, you will be able to manage it.
Remember to be conscious and intentional during the holidays. You're more likely to enjoy them! | 
