OCTOBER MEETING
Date: Sunday, November 7, 2010
Time: 6:30-7:00pm Networking
7:00-9:30 Meeting
(with break)
Admission: $5 - $20 (sliding scale)
Place: Oaks Room
Novato Oaks Hotel
215 Alameda Del Prado
Novato, California
(Directions)
Light Snacks and Drinks Will Be Provided
(Do Not bring your own snacks)
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MEETING HIGHLIGHTS
POWERFUL NON-DEFENSIVE COMMUNICATION
A New Way of Being
with
SHARON STRAND ELLISON
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INTRODUCTION
Major discoveries about human nature are unfolding, including evidence that what we believe can alter our own reality and even our genetic makeup. Unfortunately, we often stay stuck in patterns that cause us to create self-fulfilling prophecies, drawing just the right people into our lives to co-create them, for good or ill. Thus, sometimes, no matter how hard we work, we still face seemingly irresolvable problems in our relationships and feel like something is missing from our lives.
WHAT IS PNDC?
PNDC stands for Powerful Non-Defensive Communication™, a new paradigm that is a dramatic departure from our traditional methods of communication, which are based on the "rules of war." Sharon has spent most of her life developing this process because it never made sense to me to use the use the same rules for two such completely different activities - war and conversation.
Each of these two systems of communication is as precise as a software program. Each provides a specific framework for how we talk to each other. Each achieves different outcomes. The War Model is a system for using defensiveness for self-protection and power struggle to achieve our goals. It is literally designed to create and accelerate conflict, which ultimately undermines our ability to achieve our goals and creates much needless pain in our lives.
The PNDC Model is a system for protecting ourselves without getting defensive and achieving our goals without resorting to power struggle. The outcome is that we can be direct and honest, open and transparent, gaining integrity while keeping spontaneity. We are more likely to feel compassion for others, while having the capacity to create clear boundaries. We can build the kind of character that enhances our own creativity and success, while prompting others to have greater respect and caring for us.
WORKSHOP: STEPS IN THE PROCESS
First: In this session, Sharon will facilitate a process - using group discussion and exercises - for examining the idea that defensiveness is the "greatest glass ceiling on our human potential." It will focus on the dynamics of defensiveness, including how it impacts us physiologically; 6 common defensive modes; and how this traditional War Model for Communication functions to systematically create and accelerate conflict. Beyond that, even when we are trying to support or empower a friend, co-worker or family member, we often inadvertently prompt resistance.
Second: Using mat work and role-playing to help participants visualize the process, Sharon will demonstrate how we shift the way we use power in verbal interactions. Making this shift, we don't need to rely on defensiveness for self-protection or power struggle to achieve our goals. We can communicate with strength, integrity and compassion regardless of how others respond. Without ever trying to control others, the "side-effect" is that they will often instantly drop their own defenses and open the door to the kind of real conversation that heals and transforms.
Third: People who attend this session will learn practical steps for using the Powerful Non-Defensive Communication (PND) process developed by Sharon. We'll look at how to shift (a) intention, (b) tone, (c) body language, and (d) skill sets for how we say what we say. It is a method of communication that brings together honesty and vulnerability, creating an alchemy that produces unique strength and allows our potential to unfold.
Fourth: Using rich stories, role-playing and discussion, Sharon will walk participants through the steps in Non-Defensive Communication, including:
1. Asking questions so that instead of feeling interrogated, others are more likely to drop their defenses and get to the heart of an issue quickly
2. Giving feedback so that instead of feeling judged, others feel respected and are more likely to listen
3. Stating our own thoughts, feelings and beliefs with clarity, integrity and even passion, so that instead of alienating others, we can build bridges of understanding, and
4. Predicting consequences so that instead of others feeling controlled, we can create relationships that are more reciprocal.
While this is a short session, you will leave with many ways to begin to practice becoming more non-defensive, enhancing your capacity to fulfill your creative potential and capacity for deeper, more intimate relationships.
COMMENTS FROM PEOPLE
WHO HAVE HEARD SHARON SPEAK
"I feel a genuine shift to a calmer attitude towards everything I've done . . . I think that deep down, on some hidden level, we know we're hurting each other somehow when we're in power struggle, but it's so automatic, so expected and accepted, that we don't even think to stop and ask ourselves what that pain is all about.
When I started speaking differently, it was so obvious. When I realized my words weren't betraying my actual feelings, I was blown away and I felt more in touch with my emotions. The best analogy I can come up with is that if I'm a camera body, I've just been given a new set of lenses. A set of lenses with no distortion."
-Jesse di Franco
"Even therapy couldn't do this for us. We now have answers to what's wrong and what we can both do about it. I am without words to sufficiently express my gratitude and the magnitude of the impact for us as a couple." - Juliette
I was amazed by the results when I used Sharon's methods. I had a conversation with my son which was enriching, productive and gratifying in a way that no prior conversation had been within memory. We both emerged from our formerly unshakeable patterns. -Thomas Harmon
Sharon Ellison's workshops took the campus and community by storm. I can easily say that in my five years here no speaker we have had, even others with international reputations, has galvanized our community as effectively as she did. A year after her visit, people are still actively discussing and practicing these non-defensive communication skills. I find Sharon Ellison's professional expertise and personal insight to be quite remarkable. She is truly a woman of courage and vision.
-Dr. Mary De Shazer, Coordinator of Women's Studies, Wake Forest University, Winston-Salem, NC
I can still remember the silence of the audience being pierced by little astounded gasps as the profundity of what Sharon was talking about became evident . . . a "eureka!" or "a-ha!" moment wherein one comes to realize . . . that within grasp is an awareness and a set of techniques whereby one can act in the world in a way congruent and harmonious with our highest intentioned selves."
-Chris Arnold, Collaborative Lawyer and Mediator, Past-President, Ontario Collaborative Law Federation, Adjunct Professor, University of Ottawa Faculty of Law
Albert Einstein was able to visualize and communicate a more profoundly accurate model of how our physical Reality is structured, as a quantum space-time fabric. I believe Sharon Ellison has done the same with a more profoundly accurate model of how our human Relationships are structured, as a linguistic virtual reality. Changing how we speak changes how we relate. Her work might transform humanity in the 21st century.
-Stephen Weitz, Ph.D., Biochemist
ABOUT SHARON
Sharon Strand Ellison, a pioneer in the field of eliminating defensiveness, is an international communication consultant, an award-winning speaker, and the author of Taking the War Out of Our Words. Sharon was a nominee for the Leadership for a Changing World Award, sponsored by the Ford Foundation and the Advocacy Institute. She and her daughter, Ami Atkinson, produced the audio-book, Taking Power Struggle Out of Parenting, winner of a Benjamin Franklin Award. Sharon offers public workshops, as well as doing keynotes and trainings for people in more than a dozen professions.
TO CONTACT SHARON
For more information about Sharon Strand Ellison:
Website: www.pndc.com
Email: Sharon@pndc.com
Phone: 510-655-8086
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LAST MEETING
In October, Mada Dalian revealed deep truths that help us heal into consciousness. The workshop was highly energetic and transformative. Thank you Mada!
To view a full description of this event:
http://www.rahmgroup.org/lastmeeting.html
For more information about Mada Dalian:
Websites:www.madadalian.com www.healingintoconsciousness.com
Email: Contact Mada through Kindi Gill: kindi@madadalian.com
Phone: Contact Mada through Kindi Gill: 778-558-5110
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ABOUT RAHM
RAHM stands for "Resources for Awakening Hearts and minds."
RAHM offers a forum for metaphysical exploration in the pursuit of personal and spiritual development. Meetings are designed to be both experiential and instructional. These "mini-workshops" present an introduction to subjects of interest. Topics emphasized include: healing, guidance, personal growth, the paranormal, metaphysics and spiritual awareness.
RAHM meets monthly, usually every 3rd or 4th Sunday at 6:30PM - 9:30PM.
For RAHM Contact Information click here.
To Join our mailing list
click here
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 ONLINE DONATION
RAHM's expenses include meeting space, snacks, advertising, equipment, supplies, photocopies, website, and other items.
If you would like to make an online donation to the RAHM Metaphysical Exploration Group, please make your donation to RAHM's parent group, the 501(c)(3) NonProfit Organization "Bay Area Consciousness Network." Click on the text below to make your tax-deductible contribution.
Make A Donation |
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RAHM NEWS
Photos: Select photos from our past few meetings can be found here: Photo Page.
Community Resources: Besides our own programs, RAHM promotes and lists metaphysical, healing and inspirational resources in the community. Please explore the column on the right. These are listings for select groups, events, classes and practitioners, updated regularly. Included are current classes and events. Just click on the heading to bring you to their websites for more information. You can also link to it from here: www.rahmgroup.org/events.html
Literature Table: If you have an event or a service that you would like to advertise, we have a literature table for your flyers at our meetings.
Non-Profit Status: On April 17, 2010, the "RAHM Metaphysical Exploration Group" (RAHM) became a program of the "Bay Area Consciousness Network" (BACN). BACN is a registered Federal 501(c)(3) Non-Profit Corporation, and also a California Nonprofit Public Benefit Corporation. RAHM co-facilitators Steve Glanz and Adriana Ames were voted President and Treasurer respectively of the BACN Board of Directors. Former President Chris Carlisle is now BACN Secretary.
RAHM Website: Visit the RAHM website at http://www.rahmgroup.org . The site includes all of the information found in the Newsletter. In addition, there are pages reserved for photos, audio and video links, shopping, ads and speaker's websites. Blog and interactive forum to come later.
Send-From and Mail-To: The RAHM Newsletter is sent from "RAHM" in addition to "Steve Glanz." The email addresses for Steve and Adriana are steve@rahmgroup.org and adriana@rahmgroup.org.
Flyer: If you would like to help distribute or post the RAHM Flyer for this event, please visit the Flyer Page on our website. You can also view or download it directly by clicking on this link. FLYER.
Volunteers: Thanks to all who attended the volunteer meeting on October 3. We would also like to to acknowledge all of the volunteers who have been so helpful at recent meetings: Penny Swaybill, Russ Lee, Anthony Phillipson, Diane Moreno, and Mike Duvall and his son.
Advertising and Announcements: Do you want to advertise your upcoming event? Send us your listing and we will include it in our newsletter. Listings should be short and we can provide a link to the event website. There is no charge. (Ads are updated for the Reminder Newsletter.) There is also time at our meetings to briefly announce your service or event.
Archive:You can view an archive of previous RAHM Newsletters here: Archive
Subscribe: If you are not on the mailing list, you may subscribe to the RAHM Newsletter. Click here to skip to the Subscribe Link below: Subscribe
Programming: Although RAHM has an excellent lineup of future speakers, we are always open to suggestions. Please contact us if you know someone that would be a good fit for our unique forum.
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SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT:
FMBR EVENTS AND
OPT-IN INSTRUCTIONS
RAHM has affiliations with various sister organizations. One of the most impressive of those organizations is The Foundation for Mind-Being Research (FMBR), a 30-year non-profit organization exploring the frontiers of science and consciousness. They are kindly offering a FREE subscription to their online newsletter.
This is a monthly newsletter that contains information about their upcoming monthly talk, a featured editorial about a consciousness and science-related topic and other relevant information regarding workshops, events and related community activities.
The FMBR enjoys a justifiable reputation in the field for quality speakers. These have included Dr. Fred Alan Wolf from the film What the Bleep, Dr Bruce Lipton, author of Biology of Belief, Dr. Rollin McCraty of HeartMath Institute, Dr. Beverly Rubik from the Institute of Frontier Science and Dr Marilyn Schlitz from the Institute of Noetic Sciences.
To learn more information about the FMBR and their programs, go to: http://www.FMBR.org. To make use of this FREE subscription gift to the FMBR Newsletter, please send an email with your name and email address to subscription@FMBR.org
The FMBR shares the RAHM Organization email privacy, and will not sell, rent, or trade your personal information with any other party. Also, you can easily unsubscribe at any time.
Upcoming Event: On October 26, join FMBR's Spoon Bending party. Click here to view or download the flyer.
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COMMUNITY EVENTS
Updated Regularly
Click on headings for more informationSan Francisco Green FestivalSan FranciscoNovember 6, 7* Dolores Huerta* Amy Goodman* Thom Hartman* John Perkins* Bill McKibben* 125 Speakers* 300 Merchants * Live Concerts
* Spiritual Economics
* Ecology Outings
* Dance Your Prayers
* Course in Miracles
* 12 Powers Classes
* Prayer Circles
* Drumming Circles
Harvest Dance and CelebrationSebastopolNovember 5-7* Music* Amazing Panel Discussions* Demonstrations
The Global Summit IISan FranciscoNovember 8-10* Sustainable Technology Expo* Barbara Marx Hubbard* John Perkins* Melanie St. James* David Gibbons* 40 speakers Crystal ChaliceFairfax* Akashik Council Journey - Saba Barrett* Evolutionary Initiations - Christine Hodil* Dancing with Source - Ashley Warrenton-Smith* Starseed Experience - Mariefrance CoteUnity In MarinNovato* Live Concerts* Spiritual Economics* Ecology Outings* Dance Your Prayers* Course in Miracles* 12 Powers Classes* Prayer Circles* Drumming CirclesGolden Gate Center for Spiritual Living
Corte Madera
* Visioning - Janet Carol Ryan
* Spirit in Business - Sarah Hargrave
* Humanity Ascending movie - Barbara Marx Hubbard
* Chopra book study group
Community Congregational Church
Tiburon
Ongoing Services
* Labyrinth
* Healing Circle
* Meditation Group
Tuesday Night Deeksha
Corte Madera
Contact: Gail Tarlow gailtarlow@gmail.com
Song and Spirit Center
Novato
* Chanting Circles
* Sound Collective Ceremonies
* Uncovering the Voice
* Music in Home, Work Hospice
* How Music Heals
* Children's ProgramsMarin Holistic Care Center
Fairfax
* Affordable Complementary Medicine
* Multiple Practitioners
* Founded by David Kitts
Open Secret BookstoreSan Rafael* Day of Dead Dance Celebration - October 30* Carmen Gamper - Twin Hearts Meditation* Mallissa Seaman - Yoni Speaks* The Artists's Way * Cheri Huber - Soto Zen* Jeff Foster - Intimacy & Nonduality* Lama Tharchin Rinpoche* Psychic Housecleaner - Sheldon Norberg* Vastu Shastra & Vibrational Meditation - Free Event* Kirtan and Puja Events* Feeding Your Demons Tibetan Buddhist Intensive - Roberta & Jeff Tipp* Cece Converse* Arisa Victor
East West Bookstore Mountain View
* Stephen Halpern Concert* Holistic Parenting - Holistic Moms* Earth Magic Oracle Cards - Steven Farmer* Swami Beyondanand* Secret History of Dreaming - Robert Moss
Anubhiti Retreat Center
Novato
* October 23 - Navratri Festival
* Myths and Symbols
* Remedies for a Restless Mind
* Attitude of Gratitude
* Positive Thinking
* Inner Leadership
* Self-Esteem
* The Link of Love
* Raja Yoga
* Tai Chi
* Perceptions on Stress
Foundation for Mind Being Research (FMBR)
Palo Alto* PK Party - October 29
Sunrise Center
Corte Madera* Qi Gong - Darren Huckle* Permaculture* Near Death Experiences Panel* Compassionate Communication - Lori Grace* Tools for Healing: Judaism, Islam, Christianity* Non-Drug Approaches For Emotional Balance
Spirit Rock Meditation Center
Insight Meditation Buddhism
* Friday morning meditations
* Mindfulness classes
* Monday nights with Jack Kornfield
* Meditation & Qi Gong
* Women's Class
* Cultivating Wise Speech
* Meditation for Fun & Enlightenment - Wes Nisker
* The 9 Bodies - Energy States of Meditation
* Young Adult Insight Meditation
* Concentration Retreat
* Enneagram - Defense & Recovery
* Reduce Stress, Pain, Illness
* Loving What Is - Byron Katie
* Forgiveness, Assertiveness
* Practice of Loving Presence
* Befriending the Shadow
* Clear Sight, Open Heart
* Embodied Presence
* Mindfulness in Education
* Meditation & Creativity
* Presence in Each Moment
* Grief Ritual
* Neuroscience of Family Life
* Serenity & Equanimity
* Lovingkindness
* Chanting & Meditation
* Dharma & Recovery
* Insight Meditation
* Spirit Rock Singles
Institute of Noetic Sciences
Petaluma* Brain Creativity - Sloat Shaw* Connecting with Ancestors - Ralph Metzner* The Healer Within - Lee Lipsenthal, MD* Seekers and Sages - Marilyn Schlitz, Michael Murphy* Getting the Love you Want: Harville Hendrix, Helen Hunt
Friendly Favors
PetalumaWalnut Creek* Solving Crises with Global Cooperation - Elisabet Sahtouris* Childhood Wisdom - Richard Miles* ET Exopolitics & Obama - Steve Bassett* Tapping Ocean Wave Energy - Clifford Brown
Circle Center Community Hub
Fairfax
* Osho Kundalini Meditation
* Integral Leadership
* Ticor Seva
International Association of Near Death Studies
(IANDS)
Berkeley* Yolaine Stout - October 26
Green Gulch Zen Retreat Center
Mill Valley
* Weekly Zen Services
* Knowing Nature Workshop
* Intimacy & Relationships
* Transforming Depression & Anxiety
* Writing as a Spiritual Practice
* Zen and Psychotherapy Practice
* Bodhisatva Precepts
* One Day Sittings
* Weekly Dharma Talks
NLP Marin
(Neuro-Linguistic Programming)
Novato
* Beginning and Advanced Trainings
* Family Constellations
* Work and Business Constellations
* Money Magic
Sufi Dances of Universal Peace
Complete Listings
Many Local Groups
Other
Bay Area Bookstores With Classes and Events
Gateways - Santa Cruz
Many Rivers - Sebastopol
Angel Light Books - Berkeley
Fields Books - San Francisco
Crystal Way - San Francisco
Mystic Dream - Walnut Creek
California Institute of Integral Studies (CIIS)
San Francisco* Enneagram - Helen Palmer, Sharon Berbower* Hakomi - Ron Kurtz* Drumming, Overtone Singing, and Mind-Body Synchronization with Glen Velez* Spirituality and Social Justice - Darleen Pryds* Music and Spirituality - Silvia Nakkach* Conscious Capitalism - Sheldon Hughes* Tomatis Method of Auditory Stimulation - Pat Moffitt Cook* The Use of Sound in Integrative Medicine with Dr. Mitchell Gaynor* Jewish Wives of Prophet Muhammed - Tamam Kahn
Ongoing Classes
Mill Valley
Ongoing Metaphysical Classes
Berkeley
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