Cycling Santa 2009!!!
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Our annual Cycling Santa Pub Crawl (aka Santarchy) will take place on Saturday, Dec. 26th. Meet at the Can in your Santa/elf/slutty Santa helper costume at 6. Bring a crappy bike. We start the pub crawl at 7. Above is a photo from the start
of last year's crawl. You can see all the photos at: CyclingSantaPhotos
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Photos of the Week
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To view all the photos from Halloween click this link:
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Fill out a Vibrator Race Bracket and win $200!!
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Our 1st Annual Vibrator Race Tournament starts Friday, November 27th. There will be 32 entries. You can fill out a bracket (no charge) just like the NCAA basketball tournament and test your handicapping skills against all the other sex-toy experts.
1st place is $200 cash
2nd place is $100 cash
3rd place is a 12-pack of Hamm's
The bracket can be downloaded from the link at the top of our home page or just stop in the Can and fill one out. Must be in before the 1st race on the 27th. What have you got to lose??
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Join the Alumni Club!!
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Starting December 1st, you can join our Alumni Club. $20 gets you a membership for a year, Alumni Club sweatshirt, special Club parties and most importantly, happy hour prices all the time on weekdays. We sold out last year, so get in to the Can and get your membership ASAP.
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Sardine Can Update goes Electronic!!!
We hope you like our new update format. Wait, we don't give a shit if you like or not. But it will make it easier for us to list events, show photos and links and generally let you know what all the "professional boozers" at the Sardine Can are up to. Enjoy ya douche!!!
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| Upcoming Events |
 
Windell brings some common sense to the Sardine Can this Saturday!!!
You heard right!!! Windell the delivery guy from all those great Miller High Life commercials is "Bringing the High Life" to the Sardine Can this Saturday Nite from 6:30 to 7:30. Come on in, crack a High Life and get his autograph and a photo. Hell, bring the kids, it's early enough. You all MUST BE CRAZY if you miss it!!!!
Friday, Nov. 20th, The Mulligans Band. No cover. http://www.myspace.com/mulligansband
Wednesday, Nov. 25th..... Festivus!!!! Our annual Festivus celebration complete with aluminum pole, the airing of the grievances and feats of strength!!!
Fri & Sat Nov. 27th & 28th ... 1st Round of "Push to the
Pink" Vibrator Race Tournament
Fri & Sat Dec 4th & 5th..........2nd Round of "Push to the
Pink" Vibrator Race Tournament
Saturday, Dec. 12th.............. "Great Eight" face off in the "Push to the Pink" Vibrator Race Tournament
Saturday, Dec. 19th.............. "Final Foursome" in the
"Push to the Pink" Vibrator Race Tournament
Saturday, Dec. 26th... "Push to the Pink" Vibrator
Race CHAMPIONSHIP!!!
Saturday, Dec. 26th........ "Cycling Santa" Pub Crawl
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| This week's smack
2009 Packers are garbage!!
Packers lost again. This time to the lowly Bucs. Wife beatings in Green Bay soared. As did suicides committed with recently sighted-in deer rifles - they are amazingly accurate when shoved down the throat. The season is over and Brett Favre is ramming it up our collective asses - a football enema so to speak. McCarthy and Thompson are on their way out of town faster than a fart in a blizzard. At least we have the.......... aw shit we don't have anything else!!!
London bars are garbage!!!
Boyd and Briana recently returned from a trip to London and of course, while they were there, they had to sample the local pubs. A LOT of local pubs. These bars, frankly, suck. Oh sure, they were classic, with lots of old woodwork and cool tin ceilings, but BOOOOOORING. Everybody sits around drinking their beer on short little stools around tiny little tables with little or no music. They rarely serve a cocktail which is evidenced by their ice bin which is the size of a small tupperware container. Shots are unheard of. We thought the Brits and Irish were true drinking pros. Not so. Other London observations:
1) Soccer and rugby are huge. No American football at all. Nothing wrong with rugby though - fun to watch and those guys are tough bastards. Soccer is still boring and filled with pussies who probably couldn't hack it in rugby.
2) Lots and lots of gays. Probably explained by the lack of attractive women.
3) Skinny jeans are back. They even roll up the narrow pant legs on the bottom.
4) Watch where you walk. There's lots of traffic and you look left for a car like here in the states and you'll get clobbered by a double-deckered bus coming from the opposite way since the traffic patterns are backwards.
5) The dollar is really week right now, so everything costs a fortune. London is usually about as expensive as New York. With the exchange rate now, you might as well just bend over. Well except for all the gays.
6) The food is garbage!!!! Here's just a sample of the lovely menu at one of the local pubs: Mushy peas, Bangers and Mash, Bubble and Squeak (topped with a duck egg - yum!!!), cottage pie, spotted dick (some kind of pudding - who knew!!??) and for dessert, who wouldn't want a tart with double cream. Actually, the tarts sound pretty good. The rest sounds God-awful. And we tried some of them and they were awful. Good thing the French are right across the Channel.
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This week's best:
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T-shirt of the week: PLAYSTATION (arrow pointing down)
Joke of the week: What's six miles long and goes four miles per hour? A Mexican funeral with only one set of jumper cables.
Quote of the week: "Drink what you want, drink what you're able, but if you're drinking with me you'll be under the table!!!" - Anonymous
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Sardine Can Alumni Club Specials this Month
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Monday - $4 Domestic Pitchers
Tuesday - $1 tappers
Wednesday - $3 Captain & Cokes
Thursday - Buy One, Get One
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Lazy, worthless, chain-smoking tipwhores
slinging drinks this weekend are:
Friday Nite: Briana, Leslie, Jen K, Chris Hansen
Saturday Nite: Boyd, Briana, Angie, Zim and yes, Vibrator Races at 10:30 pm!!!
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