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June, 2010
In this issue:
- Article:
The Importance of Play
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Join Leslie and Susie Larson discussing her book Lord, I Just Want to Be Happy on a taped radio show tomorrow (Tuesday, June 8th) @ 1:10pm CST by calling 1-877-933-2484 or 1-877 93-FAITH
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Leslie Answers Your Questions:
How do you show your adopted child that they are a valuable part of your family?
- What's New? Join Leslie on Facebook
- New DVD available soon:
A Women's Guide to Handling Conflict
- Upcoming Events with Leslie
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The Importance of Play
I don't know how to play very well. I know I'm not alone. When my own children were little, I felt awkward and self-conscious rolling around in the grass or finger painting. I felt anxious when playing too long. I always had one more thing to get done and even when I didn't, simply having fun seemed like a waste of valuable time.
Recently I spoke with a gentleman who was stressed out and on the verge of depression. In looking at some things he could change in the moment, I encouraged him to get extra sleep and play some golf over the weekend. He said, "How can I do that without feeling guilty?" Like me, this man regularly bowed to the relenting tyrant called productivity. But lately he's noticed that his daily accomplishments are compromised due to exhaustion.
Dr. Stuart Brown, a medical doctor, psychiatrist, and clinical researcher in the area of play writes about the importance of taking time for play even as adults. He says, "Play is anything but trivial. It is a basic biological drive as integral to our health and functioning as sleep or nutrition." He claims, "Play shapes the brain, play opens the imagination and play invigorates the soul."
Play is good for us! If that's true, then why don't we allow ourselves more play time? For me and lots of others it's busyness. Being a first born, overachiever, I am good at working but terrible at playing. There is always one more thing (or 50 more things) that I need to finish before I can let myself relax. Other people tell me that they feel guilty playing. They've been told play is for children; it's immature and irresponsible. Play has no value because it's not productive. Sometimes we just feel silly playing. We aren't athletic or competitive and we feel stupid when we don't know how to do something well.
But after reading Dr. Brown's book, and listening to the Holy Spirit, I am convinced of the importance of more play in my life. Yes, there are aspects of play that can be destructive (like gambling, repetitive internet games or high risk behavior), but overall, constructive play is necessary to our well-being.
So I'm learning to play more and I've discovered that I feel better, freer, and I actually find I am more productive and creative. Therefore, I want to challenge you to think about the importance of play. How can you incorporate more good play into your everyday life? For me, playing with my dog, dancing, reading, flower gardening, hiking, and enjoying God's creation are all huge boosts to my body, spirit and soul.
Here are some ways Dr. Brown recommends we learn to play more:
Physical activity - dance, skip, hike, bike ride, roller blade. Don't worry if you don't know how or feel self conscious. Part of the value of play is learning how and mastering a new skill. Social interaction- book club, cooking class, craft class, bird watching adventure. Skip the internet chat rooms. They create an artificial relationship and eat up lots of time. Adventure - white water rafting, safari, camping, vacation - these things challenge us and open our minds and hearts to new experiences as well as recharge our batteries. Art - drawing, painting, weaving, flower pressing. We are designed to desire beauty and created by God to co-create. Learn to make something new. Don't hold yourself back because you fear the difficult. Part of the value of play is giving yourself a challenge with new things.
So friends, this newsletter is briefer than usual because I'm going out to play. Now go and have some fun!
P.S. The book I referenced is called, Play by Stuart Brown, M.D. Gary Thomas also has a new book out on the same topic called Pure Pleasure.  |
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Leslie Answers Your Questions
Q. My husband and I can't have biological children, but still feel we want a family so we've been talking about adoption. I see in your books you have one adopted child and one biological child. I think there are many cases where adoption goes wrong (but then I suppose that happens with biological children as well), but it's encouraging to know that a family without genetic heritage can have such a positive family bond together. My question is this: How on a practical day to day level, do you show your adopted child, especially when their ethnicity shows them to be so obviously not your natural child, that they are a valuable part of your family? We really want children in our family and we live in a country where there are many orphaned and neglected children, but we don't want to jump into something without thinking through it clearly and making certain that we would be the best parents that we could possibly be for any children that God would give us.
A. Adopted children are every bit as much as a gift from God as natural born children are. I can't imagine my life without my daughter Amanda, who we adopted from Korea at 4 months of age. We already had a home grown son Ryan, and Amanda was a wonderful blessing. With that said however, raising children, whether they be biological or adopted, presents challenges for all parents and you are wise to be prepared as much as possible for the sacrifices and challenges that parenting brings.
To read the rest of Leslie's answer,
Click here to visit Leslie's blogspot For more information and answers to other relationship questions, visit Leslie's blog at leslievernick.blogspot.com.
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WHAT'S NEW?
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You can also join Leslie's book discussion group on Facebook on her newest book, Lord, I Just Want to Be Happy. Just log on to Facebook and then... |
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Click Here to Join the Book Discussion
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We are currently establishing our Twitter page. New information will be available soon.
NEW DVD
A new DVD will be available soon entitled A Women's Guide to Handling Conflict. Visit our website for purchasing info.
June
June 8 Radio interview with Susie Larson on Lord I Just Want to be Happy. See above for more infomation
June 14 Moody Mid-Day Connection Radio 12 noon CST on The Emotionally Destructive Relationship
September
Sep 11 Salem United Methodist Church, Women's Breakfast Springtown, PA
Sep 23-25 AACC National Conference, Branson, MO
October
Oct 16 Free Truth for Women Seminar on The Emotionally Destructive Relationship, Allentown, PA
Oct 21 Care Net Pregnancy Center Banquet, Allentown, PA
Oct 22-24 Women Anew Conference, Huron, OH
Oct 29-31 Grace C&MA Church, Middleburg Heights, OH
November
Nov 12-13 Hearts at Home Conference, Rochester, MN
Leslie communicates God's truth with ease and practical application. She is a gifted communicator and counselor. Leslie understands the pulse of today's women. Her sessions at our Design 4 Living Conference received 5 stars! I would highly recommend Leslie to any group that is looking for Real-Truth and Real-Life Application!
Debbie Alsdorf
Author/Speaker/Women's Ministry Leader
Design4Living Ministries
Livermore, CA
Leslie Welcomes
Your Questions:
Leslie wants to help you grow in your personal and relational effectiveness. Send your questions about dealing with difficult people, stress, or relationship issues to:
Leslie@LeslieVernick.com
Then, visit Leslie's blog as she posts her responses to one question per week.
Note: Due to the volume of questions that Leslie receives, she is unable to respond to every question.
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