if you're reading this in the northern hemisphere then take a look outside; rain, snow, grey clouds...it's time to turn on the sun

sneak down to the tanning salon and bake yourself to a crisp

put on your snow boots and strike up the bbq

rent 'the big blue'

uncork the chianti

and settle in for a seafood platter that tastes like a smorgasbord of sunshine!

(then you can have some fun times searching for each other's tan lines!)

...and for those readers basking in southern hemisphere, don't get too smug, your chilly days are just around the corner, so use this menu as a last hurrah before you haul out the winter woollies!

boquerones are tender, juicy white anchovy fillets. so far removed from the whiskery old things you're used to fishing off the pizza

I snuck off to sydney for a week or so...there had been one too many mudslides in my neck of the woods...so I decided to skip home to the dry side of the pacific: hopped on a plane, downed a sleeping tablet with a shot of duty free vodka and woke up in my motherland. cleared customs. caught a cab. knocked on the door of my old pal, brooke. we were off!

hadn't been in the country for two hours before she had whisked me off to her favourite chinese restaurant and - I kid you not- it was called cum fook. anyway, there was no moving brooke until the shu mai came around...isn't it always the way with dim sum?...so we had quite a session. the lazy susan needed a re-tread by the time that we left

my point (and I'm clearly in no rush to get there) is that if anyone is going to have a salty little devil lurking in her fridge, it will be brooke...and sure enough, she had a little dish of boquerones

for a salty little start to the meal, toast some rounds of ciabatta, top with a leaf of arugula, a boquerones fillet, a slice of good parmesan and finish it all off with a sprinkle of chopped parsley, a squeeze of lemon juice and a drizzle of olive oil

these babies are so easy. and they make you look awfully clever. you buy the baby calamari, mix the stuffing. use the leftover stuffing as a salad, grill the calamari for 3-4 minutes and you're done. grill the scallops at the same time and you're a hero!

here's what you do:

the calamari: buy around 3 tubes per person, run your finger around the inside to make sure that all of the cartilage has been removed...rinse them out and pat them dry

the stuffing: mix 1 tin of cannellini beans (rinsed and drained) with 1/2 cup parsley (chopped) and the rind from a 1/4 preserved lemon (finely diced)...12 grinds of the pepper mill, a splash of olive oil and you're done. now, use a teaspoon and fill each calamari tube (you'll only get a couple of spoons in each tube). douse the stuffed calamari in a little more oil and keep in the fridge until you're ready to cook them (this can be done hours ahead)

the salad: mix the leftover stuffing mix with some finely sliced fennel (anise)...about 1/2 a bulb...or the lot if you don't want leftovers...a dash more olive oil before you serve it all (maybe some fresh oregano leaves and lemon juice)...and that's it!

grilling: make sure that the calamari are lightly coated in olive oil so they don't stick to the grill. get the bbq good and hot, place the tubes on the grill. cook 2 minutes, turn, cook another 2 minutes. done!

oh! wait...harissa. okay, lets make this easy. soak about 1/3 cup chili flakes (seeds and all) in 2 tablespoons of warm water. set aside. measure 1 tspn of each: coriander seeds, fennel (or caraway) seeds, ground cumin, sea salt, black pepper. mix these in a grinder or blender. add the chili flakes and 2 tablespoons of chopped mint. pulse the blender then add the juice of 1/2 a lemon and 1/3 cup olive oil and pulse again. done!

before you taste this, beware: it's bloody hot! harissa is an african chili sauce. the faint of heart can calm it down by adding a 1/3 cup tomato paste...or serve it alongside some tzatziki

drizzle a little harissa over the calamari when you serve it

these are the perfect partner for the calamari as they cook as quickly and they both look so cosy on a platter together

here's the skinny:

try and get yourself some pepper crusted pancetta...just for the spice factor. no sweat if you can't; prosciutto or bacon will do

I buy frozen scallops (the biggest that I can find)

couple of reasons

first: I lay them out on a plate lined with paper towel (not touching) so that they thaw in nice round shapes. once they lose their shape, or split, they just don't look as good

second: they are easier to handle if they are still a little frozen

so: uncoil your pancetta, cut a strip about 10 inches / 25 cm...wrap it around a scallop (double over any excess pancetta) and then grab a twig of rosemary which has had the leaves stripped off it (or use a skewer if you've no imagination)...pierce the twig through the pancetta and semi-frozen scallop. repeat until you have 3-4 scallops on a twig

place the scallops kebabs on some paper towel and set them in the fridge to finish thawing until you are ready to grill them

douse them in a little olive oil, toss them on a hot grill. 2 minutes a side...a little more if you want the pancetta super crispy...and serve them with some paprika sprinkled over (thank you, bobi) or some maresh pepper flakes or (let's make it easy) more harissa!

and while you're at it, shave some parmesan on top...heck, put some on the salad as well!

I'm typing this from a hotel business lounge as I am on secret assignment in jacksonville, florida

at the restaurant that I went to last night (I checked in late and ventured no further than the hotel...serves me right) I was served by a waitress sporting a mullet

I was fed a charmless plate of cauterised shrimp

I went up to my room and hopped in bed with my 'thursday next' novel (hence all that 'secret assigment' nonsense!)

I dreamed of anti pasti

plump, juicy, tender olives

rolled in chili and garlic

crunchy pickled cauliflower and sweet peppers

alas, I woke up still tasting rubbery prawns

why drag something...anything...out of the ocean only to flame it to death, douse it in yellow gravy and foist it on unsuspecting foreigners?

in short: don't forget to pick up some good olives

if I'd packed some, I wouldn't be so bitter right now!

okay so a rafia covered chianti bottle is as daggy an umberto tozzi album

but it's all about mood

besides, it the harissa is hot enough, you won't know if the wine's lousy!

my other favourite italian (under $10)?

amano's primativo. some smart yank went over to italy and planted zinfandel grapes

best of both worlds if you ask me!

*any americans dying to know what 'daggy' means, you'd best e-mail me...the definition wouldn't look too good in a food newsletter!

no playlist, sorry!

blame the hotel...I can't get onto iTunes from here

so do this:

rent 'the big blue'

buy the soundtrack

watch the movie whilst you eat

then play the soundtrack in the bedroom whilst you take turns to see who can hold their breath longest!

if you haven't conducted a tour de force of my site yet, then click on any pic in this newsletter and it will take you there. check out the 'crustacean orgasm' date for more seafood adventures!

have a look around. I'd love to hear your thoughts; just click on 'ask mannix' and you can drop me a line

let the love flow...

mannix@thelovebite.com