I swear valentine's day exists to make single people feel worse about themselves and everyone else spend money that they don't have

I'm not a fan

delivering roses, bribing the maitre d', posh champagne...it never ends

take a leaf from eve...the first lady of seduction

it starts and ends with an apple

so here's a menu which does exactly that!

I spent this past christmas ensconced on an ancient cider farm in the cheese 'bermuda triangle' of normandy; right betwixt the villages of camembert, livarot and pont l'eveque...between the apples and the cheeses all around me, I just kept mixing taste sensations until I came up with the dishes in this newsletter

somehow they seem to chart a slow and steady decline into a state of decadence. the salad has a freshness to it; the blush of the apple and the rhubarb, the crispy, crunchy goodness; it's like the maiden before the fall

by the time that we get to the dessert, there is such wantoness that even your fork will have a dirty mind!

this salad is all about crisp, pink slivers of apple contrasted with the smooth force of a livarot or morbier cheese. the rhubarb vinaigrette is the perfect foil as it is both smooth and tart. add some mache and freshly cracked walnuts and you're in business

want the recipe? click on the pic and it will take you to the site

need to calm your nerves: this is a killer cocktail to start the evening with. a reinvented champagne cocktail using prosecco and calvados; douse a sugar cube in angostura bitters, toss it in a glass and add a little calvados, top up with prosecco or champagne and garnish with some slivered apples

in terms of eve: she's winking at adam at this point (but just wait till they get to their second glass...)

mouthwatering. flavours so intense they linger on the lips like a lover's kiss. that's the way to describe this dish

the black lentils are tiny and cook so fast; none of that overnight soaking / 'may-as-well-be-wearing-tie-dye' / hatha vs ashtanga nonsense here. finally there's a lentil that you can eat wearing blahniks instead of birkenstocks!

I poured a bottle of normandy apple cider over some lentils, threw in a sliced apple and some butter and cinnamon and let it all simmer for 30 minutes

the lentils imbued the apple with this gorgeous red hue, and they taste so subtly sweet...mmm!

in contrast, the juniper, cloves and pepper give the pork a very adult sexiness

add some broccoli rabe to lend a little bitterness and I'd call that a trifecta on a plate!

normandy a bit far to go for cider? then skip the local nonsense and use a bottle of prosecco or cheap champagne

back to eve: by this stage, she's flashing some shoulder and reapplying her lipstick

for such a decadent dessert, I came across it in a terribly innocent way

I will always be blessed to have had a second mother

as if my own wasn't good enough, my mother's best friend all but adopted me as the son that she never had

she, in turn, became my own aunty mame...worldly, exaggerated and, for me, the blueprint of spohistication (context: I was 5 and it was melbourne in the 1970's)

when I left australia in the 1990's - no one knowing if I would return - she saw me off at the airport. imagine my surprise in vienna when I opened every piece of my luggage to find one of her (embossed) cards declaring in her inimitible handwriting (it was as distinctive as the paris skyline) that I belonged to her and that she must be contacted in the case of any emergency

needless to say that a woman this busy had little time or patience for the kitchen. and so she imparted precisely three recipes upon me

and I have to admit that they are the three that I receive the most requests for

one is a 'basura blanca' spaghetti bolognese which I have, in deference to any italian, re-christened 'roadkill' as it tastes so good but looks rather like its namesake

another is an apple upside down cake with lashings of hot toffee sauce.for this occasion I doused it in heavy cream and aged cavlados and I served it flaming

and eve? she applauded, she moaned, she danced with the serpent and brought her man to ruin with the first bite

aren't you just dying for the recipe? well click on the picture and it will take you there!

but you didn't really need to know that, did you?

went on a bit of a bender once with my my mate, stephen. we were in san francisco and had started the day with tequila. am sure that we dabbled in some illicit misadventures which all resulted in us wandering aimlessly around amoeba records in the haight.

in a spasm of nostalgia, I found myself seeking out nana mouskouri albums. now, in my mind she is idling in the same file as 'the two ronnies' and it is called 'cheesier than cheddar', but I have to give credit...nana has a beautiful voice

if you don't belive me, then I'm sure you'll listen to quincy jones

he nabbed her back in the 60's when she was a chubby, bespectacled lass

well, he recorded an album of standards with her and it is simply perfect

simple

perfect

enough said

so start with that for a valentine's playlist

then spin it around and make out to your favourite cowboy junkies track...

think about it

a nasty ol' bunch of roses standing all tall and thorny like a group of tight-lipped old librarians

ugh!

the only roses worth having are full blown and wanton

tightly wadded rosebuds are a mystery to me; people make such a fuss about them

it's spring; there are so many other flowers out there

and tulips, at the moment, are affordable, gorgeous and sexy as can be

the ultimate collision of mapplethorpe and o'keefe; tulips are cool...all doing their own thing in a vase...some upright, some drooping and others in their own state of flux

now you can check out thelovebite.com in all its glory...old recipes from the newsletters are available and heaps of new ones are waiting for you to discover them

the site is divided into 'dates' giving menus for different date occasions and recipes...have a look around. I'd love to hear your thoughts; just click on 'ask mannix' and you can drop me a line

let the love flow...

mannix@thelovebite.com