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First off, Happy Birthday Ellen. I talked to her twice today and forgot to say it!
Ok! I'm Sorry. The last post I did was terrible. "Is This What It's Goin To Be Like" was supposed to be an indication of what my daily routine might be like. It was dreadfully boring.
But so was today. Ok, it was supposed to be one of my normal days of retirement, but things went a little off as Jack had a bit of a medical issue that needed a visit to his doctor. Nothing serious, just a literal pain in the rump. He developed a bot of an abscess on his backside. (Ok I've gone from boring to too much information.)
I only share this because Jack had not even made it through two days of school before missing a day. Devin did all the heavy lifting on this day as I went to my workout and did a bit of cardio.
I did have some time to make more observations about retirement:
The ironing board stays out and set up an average of 4 days for every shirt ironed?
My personal real estate in our home is much smaller than I realized. That 1 foot by one foot section of bathroom space seems a lot smaller now that I am home more.
My stuff on the counter is clutter. Devin's stacks of stuff is not clutter.
When I loose my keys, it is not that big of a deal. When Devin looses her keys . . . .
One of my duties as a retired person is global toilet paper inventory. I must know which bathroom needs inventory and how much is in the garage.
Do not try and answer any question that starts with, "Where did I out my . . . . "
When being shown a strange object and being asked, "What do you think that is?" The most efficient answer is, "Gosh, I don't really know what do you think it is?" (Remember your opinions are worthless now. You are retired.)
When ever your spouse comes home do not be sitting on the couch, even if you spent that last 4 hours doing something strenuous and productive. I am now in the habit of leaving screw drivers around the house and carrying pliers just so I can get up from the couch and walk around like I am about to fix something.
Break something simple around the house so you can fix it when she is home. You get 30 minutes couch time for that. (Loosening the toilet seat screws is a good one. They hate loose toilet seats and it is so easy to fix even I can do it.)
Your junk mails is somehow junkier than her junk mail.
Choosing which mail to throw out is much more stressful than I realized. (Does she keep the Boston Proper Catalog or the William Sonoma catalog?)
Do not leave Old Time Radio Classics or The Elvis Channel on the radio when you are done using her car.
A half filled Diet Coke drink must not be thrown out until the next day.
Just because you hear her say something from upstairs does not mean she was talking to you, unless you choose to ignore what you did not hear in the first place, then she was talking to you.
"Are you going down stairs?", is not a geographical query. Just assume you are going downstairs. I have found its easier just to head that way and say yes.
Why is it that every time you need something it is not on the same floor as you are in the house?
And those are my recent retirement observations.
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Since 7/26/2012
