Our pets live relatively short lives. For many of
us who love our pets, their death can affect us even more than
the death of a relative or friend. Few people are totally untouched.
We are never quite prepared for the death of a
pet. Whether death is swift and unexpected or whether it comes at the
end of a slow decline, we are never fully aware of what a pet has
brought to our lives until our companion is gone.
During the years you spent with your pet (even if they were few),
it became a significant and constant part of your life, and if it is a therapy animal, the lives of others. It was a source of
comfort and companionship, of unconditional love and acceptance, of fun and
joy. So don't be surprised if you feel devastated by the loss of such a
relationship. Intense
grief
over the loss of a pet is normal and natural. Don't let anyone tell you
that it's
silly, crazy, or overly sentimental to grieve.
People who don't understand the
pet/owner bond may not understand your pain. All that matters, however, is how
you feel. Don't let others dictate your feelings; they are valid, and may be
extremely painful. But remember, you are not alone; thousands of pet owners
have gone through the same feelings. Different people experience grief in
different ways. Besides your sorrow and loss, you may also experience the
following emotions:
- Guilt may occur if you feel responsible for your pet's death - the "if only I
had been more careful" syndrome. It is pointless and often erroneous to burden
yourself with guilt for the accident or illness that claimed your pet's life,
and only makes it more difficult to move through your grief.
- Denial makes it difficult
to accept that your pet is really gone. It's hard to imagine that your pet won't
greet you when you come home, or that it doesn't need its evening meal. Some
pet owners carry this to extremes, and fear their pet is still alive and
suffering somewhere. Others find it hard to get a new pet for fear of being "disloyal"
to the old.
-
Anger may be directed at
the illness that killed your pet, the driver of the speeding car, the
veterinarian who "failed" to save its life. Sometimes it is justified, but when
carried to extremes, it delays the important task of resolving your
grief.
Depression is a natural consequence of grief, but can leave you powerless to cope
with your feelings. Extreme depression robs you of motivation and energy,
causing you to dwell upon your sorrow.
Your grief may be compounded by
lack of response from a friend or family member. Realize that you do
not need anyone else's approval to mourn the loss of your pet, nor must
you justify your feelings to anyone. Do not fault anyone who cannot
appreciate the depth of your grief for a pet. The joy found in the
companionship of a pet is a blessing not given to everyone.
Seek
validation for your pain from people who will understand you. Speak with
your veterinarian, a veterinary technician, groomer or another pet
owner. Ask for a referral to pet grief support groups or veterinary
bereavement counselors in your area. The death of a pet can revive
painful memories and unresolved conflicts from the past that amplify
your current emotional upheaval. Seek comfort in the support of
professional counselors or clergy.
This is an
opportunity for emotional growth. Your life was and will continue to be
brighter because of the time that you shared with your pet. This is the
best testament to the value of your pet's existence.
The Rainbow Bridge
inspired by a Norse legend - Author UnknownBy the edge of a woods, at
the foot of a hill,
Is a lush, green
meadow where time
stands still.
Where the friends of man
and woman do run,
When their time on earth is over and done.
For here, between this
world and the next,
Is a place where each
beloved creature finds rest.
On this golden land, they
wait and they play,
Till the Rainbow Bridge they cross over one day.
No more do they suffer,
in pain or in sadness,
For here they are whole,
their lives filled with gladness.
Their limbs are restored,
their health renewed,
Their bodies have healed, with strength imbued.
They romp through the
grass, without even a care,
Until one day they start,
and sniff at the air.
All ears prick forward,
eyes dart front and back,
Then all of a sudden, one breaks from the pack.
For just at that
instant, their eyes have met;
Together
again, both person and pet.
So
they run to each other, these friends from long past,
The time of their parting is over at last.
The sadness they felt
while they were apart,
Has turned into joy once more in each heart.
They embrace with a love that will last forever,
And then, side-by-side, they cross over... together.
"Our thoughts and prayers go out to Caddis and Max."Back to Top 
Coping With Loss
