"Whether you think you can, or can't, you're right" ~ Henry Ford

First thing I want to say is that most likely anyone who asks themselves this question probably knows the answer.
 
One of the speakers in the Wellness Summit was a medical intuitive, and the one thing she said that struck me is that we always know what is right for our bodies. She said, whenever we are faced with something, whether to take the pill or not take the pill, go through with the procedure or not go through with the procedure, that we can put our hand over our heart and ask the question: Is this right for me? And that if we are willing to trust ourselves, we will get our answer.
 
I believe to some extent this is true in all areas of our lives. We have the answers for ourselves. We know why we are avoiding something or not avoiding something. We know WHEN we are avoiding something.
 
So, the question of "Why am I not doing the thing when I know it will make me happier", I'm going to answer like this:
 
You know why. Just ask yourself.
 
The question then becomes, what, if anything, do you want to do about it?
 
So many people wait for their feelings to change before they take an action. Or they wait for their lives to change before they take an action. In other words, they wait for something to happen from outside of themselves to change their lives instead of just . . . well, changing their lives.
 
And this isn't a bad way to go. It just means you can be waiting a long time before something changes.
 
I find, one of the toughest things to overcome is the power of inertia, the resistance to change our direction.
 
We get comfortable being comfortable and why move beyond our comfort zone if we don't have to?
 
The problem is, as creative and expansive beings, our nature is always to expand, explore, express and create.
 
When the nature of who we are comes up against the resistance to change our modus operandi, we experience the rub. We feel the desire to break free of our constraints, and yet we feel bound by the comfort of our constraints. We want to break free of our limitations, and yet, find the comfort of them hard to resist. There is a push pull between an inner nagging and an external comfort.
 
Quite the quandary. Isn't it.
 
So, what to do?
 
The first thing I want to say is that the expansive part of you is going to win. It's just like trying to stop a baby from growing bigger. You can't. It's going to happen. It is the nature of who we are.

We grow. That's what we do.
 
And if you've paid any attention to that niggling voice inside, you know that it wins. It's the same voice that compelled the gentleman to write. He knows something is going on. He's watching his own behavior. He wants to know "why do I keep doing this?" and "how do I  break the cycle?"
 
The answer to this starts with a basic desire. You break the cycle by wanting to break the cycle.
 
You simply make the decision: I'm ready to break this pattern.  I'm ready to take charge of my life. I'm ready to do something differently.
 
Sometimes, just this declaration alone is enough to put yourself in a different mindset.  Because what you're doing is looking at the inertia from the outside, instead of being consumed by it on the inside. You're saying, "I can be doing something differently, here".
 
The next thing you do is ask yourself that question: "Why AM I not doing the things that I know will make me happier".
 
Because the thing is, there are always secondary gains to our behavior.
 
Many years ago when I was struggling with bulimia, there was a cycle of vicious self-destructive behavior. There would be moments of reprieve where I would actually be doing well and feeling good and then I would fall right back into it. Even though I knew it was self-sabotage, I couldn't help it.  I knew how to do failure. I didn't know how to do success.
 
The secondary gain was comfort. I knew the outcome of failure. I didn't know the outcome of success.
 
Fear of the unknown is one of the primary reasons we don't move forward.
 
But the best antidote and one of the best acronyms I've heard for fear is: Face Everything And Recover.
 
When we face the unknown, it becomes the known. And the more we face ourselves in these different circumstances, the more we can trust that we can handle it. That it's actually not all so scary.  
 
We can only evaluate this after, though, not before.
 
One of my teachers used to tell me, "Don't wait for your feelings to change before you take the action. Take the action. And your feelings will change."
 
It's good advice. And the more we practice it, the better at it we become.

In other words, we get to decide.

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