I recently came across a training module for executive leadership about conscious communication which really resonated with me in my role as a leader, Prayer Chaplain, and Prayer Chaplain Trainer.  I'd like to share some of it with you in the hopes that it will not only expand your current beliefs about communication but strengthen your skill set as well.

We live in a very fast paced modern life and we can sometimes operate in a type of "autopilot."  Our minds are often elsewhere:  multitasking, pondering an upcoming meeting, or thinking about the next point instead of listening to the person speaking.  Can you recall times when you were not fully present to others?   Have you ever missed key information in a presentation because your mind wandered?  Have you ever driven your child to school and missed out on the opportunity to connect because your mobile phone rang and became a higher priority? 

Conscious communication is about bringing awareness to the way in which we move through the world, show up for others, and ultimately communicate with others.  Conscious communication is fundamentally about awareness, perspective, and choice. 

Awareness - Content (words and data) represents only a small percentage of the meaning of communication (less than 10%).  Most meaning is derived from the context (the situation, the circumstances, timing, interpretations, nonverbal cues, etc.) of communication.  Content can be likened to the small tip of an iceberg that is visible, while context can be represented by the vast majority of the iceberg's mass that remains hidden beneath the surface.  While we are usually aware of the content of communication, most of us are unaware of the context.  Conscious communication starts with having a greater awareness about the hidden contextual aspects.  In the Prayer Chaplain Program we learn about heart or empathic listening, which is all about listening for the context rather than just the content.

Perspective - In order to effectively communicate with others, we need the ability to see things from different vantage points.  When we're able to consider things from several perspectives we are able to gain a more accurate picture or assessment of the situation than when we are stuck in a singular vantage point.  Perspective is the key to understanding others and communicating effectively.

Choice - Finally, conscious communication is about choice.  Since many people are unaware of the nuances of communication (the part of the iceberg below the surface or context), they tend to gravitate toward a singular communication style that reflects habitual and unconscious speaking and listening behaviors.  When we increase our awareness and skills by understanding the more subtle dynamics of communication, we can consciously choose the best mode of communication for any given circumstance.  Increasing our awareness gives us more choices and will in turn expand our effectiveness, power and influence as a leader and as a fellow human being.

So, the pathway to conscious communication is to begin by being aware of the dynamics of the content as well as the context of our interactions with others, by knowing that there are multiple perspective in every situation - we never know the whole story - and the understanding of those perspectives will increase our effectiveness.  And ultimately, we will learn how to make choices in how we relate to and communicate with others that will increase our overall effectiveness.

In our December issue of the newsletter, I will share with you some conscious communication principles that will hep us move our communications with others to a deeper and more effective level.  As I become more conscious with others, I become more conscious with myself. 

Thank you for sharing the journey with me!

Consider Collaborative Training for 2012