Prayer Chaplain Program Newsletter

Happy New Year! May this New Year bring to you all of your hearts desires! The weeks after the Christmas and New Year's Day Holidays are always an interesting time. For many, it is time spent cleaning up from the holiday rush and busyness of shopping, cooking, decorating, entertaining and constant "doing!" For others, these first few weeks of the year may signify a time to slow down, rest, and contemplate - to take inventory of the previous year's activities and to do some forward planning. How about you? How are you spending your time right now? Are you a planner, a goal setter? Or do you prefer just allowing it to unfold naturally? I invite you to be consciously aware of how you are starting out this New Year and what you are creating.

Are you ready for a new beginning? Are you willing to dig in and discover what you would like to have happen in your life this year? What would you like to accomplish? What good would you like to attract and what particular areas of growth do you desire? What would you like to attain, where do you long to go, and what types of relationships do you want to attract? All really good questions, aren't they? Breathe...I invite you to take out a sheet of paper and write down the answers as an affirmation of you, your life, and your ability to choose. Then let it go! Let it go, let it go, let it go. This brand new year, a time of making new choices, a time to let go of what is no longer serving you and a time to open the space and allow in new ways of being. This New Year stands before you, like a chapter in a book, waiting to be written and you are your own author. Each one of us gets to choose!

I love the way that Myrtle Fillmore, co-founder of Unity speaks about New Year opportunities in her writings from How to Let God Help You. She says, "The very word new gives a welcome, because there is something in the make-up of mankind that craves the freshness that the word suggests. So why not give the word new a place everyday? Why not on first awaking, remind ourselves that this is a fresh new day, full of opportunities and fragrant with possibilities? The restrictions of yesterday have no power to overshadow our lives today, when we realize that we are in the eternal now. Let us begin our day with newness of thought and courage. Let us at the beginning of the new year throw the doors of our hearts and homes open to the new. The 'newing' process comes first in mind.... Carry this into every detail of your life. Begin with the years and scatter them first. See yourself new, fresh, and full of vigor. Then by the same process of transforming change everything you have to deal with daily. That which was irksome and stale now takes on a new, fresh delight."

Dear friends, as you open the space for new beginnings, let the words of the Psalmist be your mantra, "Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me." (Psalm 51:10)

In Light and Love,

Reverend Lei Lanni

Leadership

A New Perspective on a Dreaded 8-Letter Word

By Jeri Royce

Throughout my personal, professional, and volunteer experiences I have had to give it and receive it. Sometimes it was a pleasant experience...other times - not so much. Occasionally the experience had a profoundly positive impact on me and occasionally it sent me spiraling down a funnel of shame, doubt, and lack of self-confidence. As I developed and matured, I began to reflect on it from a more objective stand-point and currently have a much healthier response to it. Have you guessed what the dreaded 8-letter word is? The word is "feedback."

For many of us receiving "feedback" has been and/or still is a dreaded experience as it is code for "I need to tell you what's wrong - with your performance, with your relationship, with your behavior, with you." When we are in a position of giving feedback, we often feel uncomfortable. We feel concerned about how to say what it is we need to say and how the person receiving the feedback will respond, and we often don't get the results we're hoping to achieve once the feedback has been delivered. As a leader, giving feedback can be a hard conversation, but one that we need to master for the sake of those we lead and for the organizations in which we serve. I believe that it will always be uncomfortable to give feedback until we really get comfortable receiving feedback. The key to being comfortable receiving feedback is to create a healthy context with which to receive it.

We can not control how others give us feedback. However, we can control the inner dialogue that goes on when it is happening. We can develop a frame of mind about "feedback" that makes it something we can learn from rather than run away from. I recently had an experience with a member of my family that I'd like to share with you as it gave me a way to frame "feedback" and helped me develop a context to receive it that drastically improved my ability to listen and ask questions without being defensive which ultimately, gave me the opportunity to learn from it rather than immediately dismissing it or going to a place where I felt badly about myself.

I was recently with a friend having a private conversation when she started by saying, "Jeri, I'd like to give you some data." She continued "I've noticed that when this happens...you do this..." Now, I am a very self-reflective person, so what she noticed I was doing was exactly right. But when she started the conversation by saying "I want to give you some data," something clicked in my brain that felt like I was about to hear something that was going to be offered but that was entirely up to me to determine the meaning and relevancy. I was definitely more receptive than I might have been otherwise, and we had a fairly long and meaningful conversation. You see, the problem with feedback usually arises not necessarily from the content delivered but from the context with which it is delivered and received.

Let's explore the context of "data" a little further. Webster's dictionary defines "data" as factual information used as a basis for reasoning, discussion, or calculation. Isn't that a great thing. Data is information that we find , observe, see on the news, or that is given to us by someone else that we get to contemplate or discuss and decide its relevancy to us. While people will not always begin the sentence with "I want to give you some data," the point is that "data" is exactly what they are giving you - factual information filtered their own perception. As we begin to think of feedback as data then we allow ourselves the freedom to suspend judgement about what is said, consider its relevancy to us, and decide if we want to do anything about it. Ultimately, the choice is always ours as are the consequences of our choices.

It may be a bit of a stretch to say that feedback is something we should look forward to but it is true that if we manage our internal dialogue enough to consider how it might support our growth, we will definitely experience growth.

Until we meet again - happy data gathering!

2011 Prayer Chaplain Trainers Workshops

Say "yes" to your next step. NOW is the time to infuse your program with new energy, train new leadership, or bring this powerful Prayer Chaplain Program to your ministry.

The Prayer Chaplain Trainers Workshop is designed to teach specific skills and core competencies and provides unique professional development for ministers, licensed teachers, and lay leaders. The training gives you everything needed to start a Prayer Chaplain Program in your ministry or train a new leader for your existing program. You will come away from this workshop filled with a renewed commitment to your ministry and the foundation of prayer. SEE and Post-Graduate Credits available.

March Prayer Chaplain Trainers Workshop

March 3 - 5, 2011

Spiritual Life Center - Sacramento, California

For more information and to register, click here.

April Prayer Chaplain Trainers Workshop

April 7 - 9, 2011

Unity Church of Beaumont - Beaumont, Texas

For more information and to register, click here.

May Prayer Chaplain Trainers Workshop

May 19 - 21, 2011

Unity Church of Palm Harbor - Palm Harbor, Florida

For more information and to register, click here.