My Husband keeps talking about my Weight ?
This can be a difficult subject for a married couple to deal with, especially if the husband is not handling this issue correctly.
A wife should first ADMIT that she has gone up a few dress sizes; however, if the husband continuously insults her about her weight, he will only make the situation worse.
I would suggest a diet and exercise plan that would benefit both parties. In doing such, you create a bond that centers on staying healthy as a couple.
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Hope in God
Political unrest, economic insecurity-today's issues can shatter our peace and stability. If you could use a little good news in your life, try a visit to Restoration Springs Interdenominational church. We're not just a cover-up or an escape from life; we're a new way of living it-a promise of joy that doesn't depend on circumstances, cultural changes or financial conditions. Come find a sanctuary of spirituality and peace, as well as the hope for a bright tomorrow.
Pastor T Charles Brantley
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How must Husbands set boundaries
against Singles?
Married men must set boundaries against single women. As a lion is caged, so does a man have to cage himself and not let single women too close to him.
When you don't have boundaries, one can and will come too close to the cage (i.e. flirting). Men, make sure you close your cage (don't flirt) when you are in the work place, but open your cage (be flirtatious) when you are home with your wife.
Husbands, some men may try to flirt with your wife; the question is: how do you handle such a situation? When you see a man flirting with your wife, don't just stand there, do something about it. For example, put your arm around your wife and introduce yourself to him so that he clearly can see that she is taken. Protect your wife since you are her covering.. |
How Often Should
Married
Couples Have Sex?
The national average is once a week (Adults, on average, have sex about 61 times per year, or slightly more than once a week, according to University of Chicago's National Opinion Research Center. Marital status and age are key influences in sexual activity).
If you and your spouse are not having sex this often, the key is finding out why.
Whether it's the husband or wife, there will be changes (such as physical changes as one gets older) and at least one person in the picture must insure that intimacy is taking place. Intimacy is not just sex, but also in the touch of your mate (such as a warm hug or cuddling up with your spouse over a movie).
It is important to remember that the frequency or intensity of intimacy is expressed differently from marriage to marriage.
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When are you ready for marriage?
In my thinking, first of all it is important that you get to know God and yourself. Then it is important that you are honest with your weaknesses and you are not arrogant about your strengths; then, you are ready for marriage.
I advise engaged or married individuals to get a marriage coach in your life early versus later. The sooner the marriage coach is involved, the better the results down the road.
I advise, to avoid baby mamma and baby daddy drama, get in a committed relationship and get married first.
But the most important thing is since you are getting married before God, you should seek His blessing upon the situation. |
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How should you conduct yourself with someone of the opposite Sex after marriage?
This depends on the person. Of course, if the interaction gets too hot, you should remove yourself from the situation.
Keep in mind, there are bold people who do not hesitate in pursing a married individual. When such a home wreaker is pursuing you, get out of the hot kitchen and run home to your spouse. |
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Are there any biological benefits to having sex with my wife?
The following are some on the benefits:
You loose 150 calories when you have sex for 30 minutes.
When a husband ejaculates, the semen absorbs high concentrations of potassium, zinc, citric acid and other substances from the blood vessels (From Australian researches).
Reduces Prostate Cancer
Within the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health, researchers found that men who enjoy an active sex life are less likely overall to die from cardiovascular causes (heart attack and stroke). For these individuals, cardiovascular problems can be cut by 50%.
Information from Robert Kennedy AC May 2008) |
Thank you to my editor Tyrone Waters.
Furthermore, if you don't have a church home we invite you to
Restoration Springs Interdenominational Church 1575 Thomaston Avenue in Waterbury.
www.rest.org
If you need baby blessings please contact me at 203-753-7377 or officiate weddings go to - S & M (Strong Marriages)
http://rest.org/SandMplus.htm
Remember In the Book of Ecclesiastes chapter 4 and verse 12 (Bible)
"And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken."
TRANSLATION (With only husband and wife the commitment can easily fail, but with God, husband, and wife the cord of commitment is not quickly broken.)
Pastor TC Brantley
Restoration Springs Interdenominational Church
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Is it OK to Have Sex before Marriage?
With the drama that goes on in uncommitted relationships the answer is no. Sex outside of marriage can lead to things like an unplanned pregnancy, STDs, and destroyed feelings (one individual's feelings of closeness are intense while the other individual's feelings are apathetic or cold).
Ladies, you must remember that what you have is high above rubies. You don't give away rubies for free or without a commitment (marriage). |
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What to do with a Verbal Abuse Spouse?
There is a good chance a verbally abusive person has been verbally abused as a child. If he or she was verbally abused as a child, then he or she will usually display that same verbally abusive behavior to their spouse.
The only way to stop this cycle is to recognize that they are passing down the pain from one generation to the next. In these cases, counseling may be needed to help stop the generational cycle of being verbally abusive.
Remember, within marriage, you and your spouse are one flesh, so whatever you say to your spouse (good or bad) affects him or her. |
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What type of sex can I not do when married, or are there any body parts off limit in lovemaking?
Taboo teaching in society has said that couples should be limited. But I don't understand why unmarried fornicating persons can have great crazy sex but married people are limited. The devil is a liar.
When married, the body belongs to each other and so it is important that they communicate with each other on the topic of lovemaking. It is important to come upon a mutual agreement with your spouse in regards to what the two of you will do sexually. Also, make sure that what you do is not against the law. |
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If one person can not control spending should there be separate accounts?
If one person in the marriage has a major issue with overspending, the other more financially responsible spouse should have his or her separate account (so that financial funds will no be depleted because of the other's spending problem). However, this separate account should not be done in secret; your spouse should know about it.
Secondly, there should be some counseling involved to help your spouse overcome the issue of overspending.
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What can we bring to the married bedroom?
As long as it is legal, there is not another person, and both you and your spouse can agree upon it, it is alright to bring into the bedroom.
Remember as you get older, you may need physical aids (such as a hearing aid or a walking cane). Similarly, in a marriage relationship, a married couple may use certain apparatuses to keep the love life interesting such as sexy outfits and scented lotions, etc. |
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Is Living together prior to marriage OK?
I believe the answer is still no. With the Bible as my source, Song of Solomon chapter 8, verse 4 states: "... I charge you: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires". I recommend you to be patient, get married first and then move in. Otherwise, be prepared for the possibility of hurt feelings, or the baby momma and baby daddy drama.
Plus ladies, when you give away your milk (your sex) away too early (before marriage) and lower your standards, what do you have left? The answer is very little.
Last I checked, there is no "common law marriage" (according to dictionary.com 'a marriage without a civil or ecclesiastical ceremony') in CT. So a man can just get up and walk away from the relationship with no legal obligations of commitment.
Also, if your spouse dies, you may be exempt from many inheritances that married couples can experience.
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Are Facebook and Myspace Alright after marriage?
In my marriage coaching, spouses with a facebook and/or myspace account is an issue I often address.
Unfortunately, I am seeing people use this as a way of hooking up and not just getting reacquainted with old friends.
In my humble opinion, if you are going to have facebook or myspace, both you and your spouse should either share an account or insure both parties have access to each other's account (by sharing each other's password).
Also, if someone proposes to you, and he/she is secretive about their myspace or facebook account, this may be an indicator to run for the hills. If you are in a serious relationship and are considering marriage, there should be no internet secrets.
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After marriage, should all ties of ex's be cut?
There is no need to have an ex in your life unless children are involved.
If there are no children involved, why would you still want to be involved with an ex? The vows say, "forsaken all others to come to the love of each other".
Also, you should never discuss your marriage problems with an ex under any circumstances. No excuses.
Some ex's can be spiteful and hurtful even when there are children involved. In such a situation, be strong in your relationship first, before you deal with baby mom or baby dad drama.
Also, the more you have people involved in your marriage (such as an ex), things will get more complicated and quite often your marriage will suffer.
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My Husband does not "Salute" During Sex What Wrong?
Many do not realize that a man's penis is a natural thermostat (Johnson never lies) that really shows his health and well being.
Since the penis is enlarged by muscles, nerves and blood vessels (arteries), outside and inside forces can impede the process including:
Getting Drunk or Taking Drugs (better to be sober)
Depression on emotions and feelings (i.e. Having an affair, thinking about issues or worried about performance)
Extreme Cold will produce a flaccid penis
Lack of Sleep
Physical Issues with one's heart
If health problems (such as #4 and #5) are preventing you from having an erection, Christian and faithful men should not feel guilty. I advise you to visit your doctor to address the health problem(s). Without visiting your doctor, merely taking "over the counter drugs", or drinking alcohol will most likely add to the problem.
(Information from Robert Kennedy AC May 2008) | |
 For God so loved the world that He gave...and the world has never been the same. Whether we always realize it or not, each gift we share at this season reflects God's gift of His son, and the hope and joy that comes with that. This Season, join us at Restoration Springs Interdenominational Church to celebrate that incredible gift, and the impact it can have on your life today. Don't leave your gift unclaimed! |
Pastor TC on Radio
Hear Pastor TC with Buck, Nancy and Chef on April 16th 2009 (This Thursday).
To hear previous shows go to Archive
Click to read some of the accomplishments of Pastor TC. All to the glory of God. |
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Get an E-BOOK INSTEAD !
Because of the recession, purchase an E-Book instead of a paper copy of Pastor TC Books. All of his books are in electronic form. Here are advantages of E-Books:
1. Cheaper
2. Can read from your PDA with the right software
3. Will receive immediately upon purchase.
4. Ebooks are searchable. You can easily search for any information in an ebook, instead of turning page after page.
5. An Ebook takes up less space compared to a traditional book.
6. Ebooks can be taken any where
7. As ebooks are delivered through the Internet, there are no packing and shipping expenses
8. Ebooks can be printable and the font can be resized.This is useful for those with poor eyesight.
You can purchase a Bundle or individually
TO PURCHASE E-BOOKS |
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Excerpt
from "Real Men Don't Have Closets" by T. Charles Brantley
Men may read this book and say I am coming
down hard on them. I have to, because races
and generations depend on us. Women have
carried the burden for too long. It's time for us
to step up. We have to tell the truth. It starts
with our loins.
Yet, even if a man is wrestling with sexuality, he needs to be honest with you. You may ask,
"How do I know if my man is down low or
real?" It's called prayer, time, and talking to his
friends. If you take him to a mall or movie with
beautiful girls and his member never moves, or
if you talk to him in a suggestive way and
nothing happens, then something is wrong.
Check out his male friends. This, I believe, is the biggest telltale sign to see if a man is on the
down low or not.
If he wants to go to a private place every
week and will not report to you his whereabouts, you may have a man who is hiding a secret. Even when it comes to sexual sessions, a real man will not go for transgender or bisexual sex. There is nothing more beautiful than the female body. A woman is something beautiful in all shapes and sizes.
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Excerpt from "Successful Marriages for Successful Men" by T. Charles Brantley
Women and men have catch words that they need to keep away from each other. That one word can start a fight. That one word or trigger is what you need to
find out in all of its points and views. It may take a
while to find out what that word is, but like a bad tooth, you will know it when you hit it. For some women it is "being negative," and for you as the man, it may be calling a man a liar. Whatever the word is, find and keep the word and points of thinking of it from your mind.
I would even go the point of getting a dictionary
and finding out other words that mean that word. In doing this, you are protecting yourself and keeping yourself from any bad word that could cross her mind. The word again will be easy to find because
when you say it or accuse her of such, she will blow the stack. In addition, most importantly, her attitude
will change major toward you.
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Excerpt of "New Sheets" by T. Charles Brantley
For too long, Hollywood has depicted married sex as dull and boring. Yet, when a "Hollywood" couple has an affair, all
of a sudden the same persons have passionate and wild sex. This book will hopefully change such images and perceptions. In actuality, adulterous sex should be done in shame and without passion because of the future guilt and pain such an act will cause those involved. On the other hand, married sex should be wild and passionate because two people (not three or
four or more) have made a commitment for life.
Because of this commitment, the sex they have with each
other expresses and demonstrates such love to the point that
every time they have sex, the sheets are changed.
One other item for men to understand: if you have emotionally abused or terrorized your wife, you WILL have an
upward journey. You can't keep making withdrawals without
giving your wife deposits. In essence, you must meet her needs
before she touches yours. In reality, we men can't look at our
wives as sex objects. We must look at them as God's creatures, who need love and understanding.
I know this is a
difficult thing, brothers, but see it from their eyes and not your own. Again, you can't keep hurting her emotionally and expect her to give back. Same thing for wives who take advantage of
their husbands. If a man is doing right, bless him sexually in the bedroom. Kick out the abuser, and let in the healer
(husband). Don't let your husband pay for the sins of others who have entered your life. But, men, again, stay committed and faithful. Fidelity is not just physical but also emotional. Be careful of emotional affairs, because they will come after you. Make deposits, husbands, into your wives' lives. And
wives, make sure the bank (loving-making) or ATM (quickies) is always open for him.
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