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Better English 56
Timely Communications Tips
February 5, 2011
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LETTERS, WE GET LETTERS
-- HOW TO BUCK UP

The previous newsletter about the word "impact" generated more responses than I ordinarily receive. I will talk about them in the next issue.


HOW TO BUCK UP
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You may have noticed that I send the newsletter usually on Tuesday or Thursday. I follow the old public relations model. Mondays are not good days for press releases because the people you want to reach are recovering from the weekend. Fridays are not good because they are preparing to leave for the weekend.

Wednesdays? It's called hump day because people are just relieved to be half-way through the week and almost over the hump, and they aren't too energetic.

But I received an extraordinary communication late Friday, and it has too many tips to wait until next week to share. Further, you are subscribers interested in communicating, not media people rifling through press releases.

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The tip is about the "buck-up" communication. It's one of the most important you can express. You want to lift up a person's spirit.

I call it the "buck up" firstly because the writer used it. Moreover, we all need to be bucked up at some point, and we also need to know when and how to send the "buck up" communication to one who needs it.

Details: A friend's daughter is an attorney out of law school for two years. She recently lost her employment with a firm. Since I was having lunch with a distinguished lawyer the next day after learning about the daughter's situation from her parents, I volunteered to show her resume to the prominent attorney.

My attorney friend readily agreed to help, and immediately arranged a lunch date with the daughter. On Friday, he emailed me a copy of his buck-up communication written to the daughter after their lunch.

The first tip is simple yet profound. A good communicator knows that there are times when we need to be bucked up. If you are a good communicator, you focus on the other person. What does that person need at this moment?

Here is what the attorney wrote: "I know that you have been making a long and conscientious effort to find a job, and I know also that constant rebuffs can be disheartening. You just have to keep on trying."

The second tip is to offer to assist in some specific way. Here is what the attorney wrote: "I would be glad to act as your reference." This is much better than the usual, "Let me know if I can help." How many times have we heard that one?

Finally, try to offer assistance that is a unique contribution based on your perspective of the situation-- one that the person may not have considered. Here is what the attorney wrote, urging her not to rely solely on email applications:
"It is very easy for the recipient to ignore an email. It is much harder to ignore a live warm body sitting in the waiting room."

Remember Diana Ross's 1970 debut hit song--"Reach Out and Touch."

Yours sincerely,
Barry Beckham


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