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Better English 101
Timely Communication Tips
24 May 2008, Issue 20
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Communicating With the Dead
-- Communicating with the Dead
-- Speaking Better--E-course Lesson 2

Are you wondering why the subtitle is Timely Communication Tips? Well, people have written kind letters referring to my blog, my grammar letter, my letter, and even my magazine. So I thought I'd try to make my purpose clearer: it's a newsletter about communication tips. And thank you for the compliments.

Communicating with the Dead
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 On Monday, we Americans celebrate Memorial Day, remembering those who have died in our nation's service. If you aren't American, you will read this issue sooner than others because you are in your office not celebrating our holiday.

It seems like a good opportunity to link death with my favorite theme--writing simply and clearly.

Actually, my concern with death started last Saturday when I hustled in to a nearby church for their yard sale. There's a term that Stuart Chase, author of the 1938 classic, "The Tyranny of Words," would quarrel about. A yard sale? But there was nothing in the yard. All the books and clothes and other stuff for sale were inside the church. Hey, I picked up his book for 50 cents!

Note: Chase's book has this theme of "directing our choice and employment of words toward accurate, complete, and readily understood communication."

I grabbed a copy of Sharon Olds' book, "The Father" for fifty cents also. No, I'm not kidding! The back cover text explains her sequence of poems: "A daughter's vision of a father's illness and death." Here is an excerpt:

The doctor said, "There are things we can do which might give you time,
but we can not cure you." My father said,
"Thank you." And he sat, motionless, alone,
With the dignity of a foreign leader.

See any big words?

Last night I talked with Arthur Porter, author of "So Many Hills to Climb: My Journey as a Computer Pioneer," that we published in 2004. He's "ninety- seven-and-a-half," he reminds me. A few months ago, Patricia, his wife of 60 years, died. He's in mourning. And although he was one of the developers of the computer in 1942, he doesn't own a PC. So he can't read this newsletter. Also, he can see only out of one eye.

He says goodnight to Patricia every night. Friends planted a dogwood tree in his yard. It's growing nicely and he can see it from every window. For Arthur, that tree is she.

What kind of language do you use for the dead? Don't you step back into your real self? Don't you eschew those terms like "aforementioned," and "referenced?" We aren't automatons when we communicate with the dead. We get real and simple, down to the plain nitty gritty.

But some system has convinced us that we must communicate outside of ourselves, outside of our true hearts. It's the same system that has trained our attorneys, politicians, physicians, academicians, and executives to use words that impress-but don't express.

So here is Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton explaining: "I regret that if my referencing that moment of trauma for our entire nation and in particular the Kennedy family was in any way offensive."

Sounds just like Sharon Olds and Arthur Porter, right? Exactly the terms you would use with your grandmother--or departed loved one, right?

Is that reviewer of your proposal less human than the soldier who died in Iraq? Then direct your communication toward a real human being.

Often I have to upload files that are too large to send by email. Here's the solution I'll share with you...


Speaking Better--E-course Lesson 2
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 Welcome to Lesson Two of Speaking Better.

This is the second of a 21-part e-course on speaking tips. Each lesson will be inserted in the newsletter. Hope you enjoy and learn.

Read as much as you possibly can about the subject until you feel completely comfortable that you know it forward and backward. This way you will not be nervous that you may say something that is incorrect.

The best way to overcome nervousness is to spend plenty of time preparing for the subject of your talk.

Find out if you will need visual aids to make your speech more enjoyable.

Figure out what kind of speech you are giving by asking yourself these questions.

  • Am I teaching something that the audience did not know before?
  • Is my focus to entertain my audience?
  • Do I want to persuade the audience to practice something?
  • Is it helping people by sharing knowledge they can use?

    Be sure to use simple, understandable words. Do not try to impress the audience with your vocabulary. Avoid saying "um" or "ah."

    Stand tall and face the audience.

    Deliver your speech with enthusiasm. Let the audience know that you are excited about your topic.

    Answer all questions quickly and as accurately as you can, and sound sincere. Don't make the questioner seem ignorant.

    Practice in front of the mirror so that you know your subject inside and out.

    Sincerely,
    Barry Beckham


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