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Better English 101
Tips For Communicating Better
Vol I, No. 8
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In this issue
-- PUTTING A NOUN AFTER "THIS"
-- WRITERS USING A NOUN AFTER "THIS"
-- WRITERS USING A VAGUE "THIS"

It's the measure of a careful writer who makes certain that the reader knows what the word "this" refers to.

PUTTING A NOUN AFTER "THIS"
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 Be sure that your reader knows what you are referring to. A good test is with the word "this." We will throw it in our written communications as if the reader knows exactly what "this" is referring to.

But the most careful writers avoid the uncertainty by putting a noun after the word. It isn't always necessary to place a noun after "this," but if you are conscious of the possible confusion, you will see that a noun can clarify your meaning.

Here are some examples where the writer was conscious of the possible confusion. And sometimes the writer wasn't.

WRITERS USING A NOUN AFTER "THIS"
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 "It was the first time I had traveled alone, but I wasn't frightened; on the contrary, this profound freedom at night seemed like an agreeable and exciting adventure to me."
--Carmen Laforent, "Nada"

"This conclusion is not that of a political partisan, for those days are long behind me; rather, it is the finding of a concerned observer, with something of a distinct understanding and appreciation of the modern presidency."
--John Dean, "Worse Than Watergate"

"This combination of low predictability and large impact makes the Black Swan a great puzzle; but that is not yet the core concern of this book."
--Nassim Nicholas Taleb, "The Black Swan: The Impact of the Highly Improbable"

"Once the battle is joined, however, with the outcome certain, he will have maximum incentive to use weapons of mass destruction and to give what he can't use to terrorists who can torment us with them long after he is gone. We cannot be paralyzed by this possibility, but we would be foolish to ignore it."
--Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton, Floor Speech, October 10, 2002

WRITERS USING A VAGUE "THIS"
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 "I hated opening those textbooks so much, it became my habit to search out the page with those charts first and scrutinize them. Perhaps this proves that we are attracted to what frightens us."
--Natsuo Karino, "Memoir of a Geisha's Sister"

"All those unused lockers needlessly tied up. This might not be a problem for the officers who drive to work from the north, but down south in the Bronx (I live there, too) you don't want to advertise that you're a correction officer:"
--Ted Canover, "Guarding Sing Sing"

"My years as a 'carefree youth' were actually pretty tough. This may be why the idea of getting married never crossed my mind."
--Rufina Philby, Mikhail Lyubimov and Hayden Peake, "The Private Life of Kim Philby"

"Anyone who challenged their rule was not only treasonous but blasphemous, deserving terrible punishment. Out of this grew a mythic tradition and a double standard that keep most Japanese submissive and silent even today."
--Sterling Seagrave and Peggy Seagrave, "The Yamato Dynasty: The Secret History of Japan's Imperial Family"


Best wishes,
Barry Beckham


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