 Dear :
This month's "Think Zink" is focused on learning about the gender differences in communication.
In my opinon, this gender difference results in poor performance at work, difficult personal relationships, and unfulfilled expecations.
The goal is to take back control of your communication, particularly with other genders. This newsletter has tips, tools and helpful ideas to make that possible.
Sarah Zink
P.S. Are you writing a newsletter and need some "snippets" of information? You are welcome to quote anything in this e-zine, provided you give appropriate credit.
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Gender Communication Basics
Why do we communicate?
Studies have shown that men communicate with others to establish status, women communicate with others to establish connection.
Because of this, men play differenent "games" than women do. Consider the following differences:
Opposition vs Collaboration
Men work to establish "one-upmanship", using tools such as: playing the devil's advocate, oppositional banter, teasing, joke-telling and story-telling.
Women however, work to establish collaboration through asking questions, complimenting, finding commonalities, sharing secrets and "tending" one another.
When you begin to understand these differences, you will begin to understand how to speak the "language" of the other gender.
If you would like Sarah to come and speak
to your group, organization or company,
please click HERE. |
Communication Differences
Women SEE things differently
Women see their environment through a kaleidoscope, men see their environment with binoculars.
A perfect example is when we enter a crowded room to sit - a woman gauges the location of chair, who it's near, etc... a man will typically choose the first available chair.
Men REMEMBER things differently
Men will remember critical details and important features, while women will remember sounds, feelings, colors, and emotions. Both of these styles are useful when piecing together business and personal issues.
Men and Women have conversations differently
In conversations, men take turns, while women bond with one another by completing one another's sentences. This is probably one of the most critical areas that women can improve on their communication skills.
If you would like Sarah to come and speak
to your group, organization or company,
please click HERE.
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January "Think Zink" Sponsor:
Kith Kath Bath House
Handcrafted Soaps, Salts, and Body Essentials
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I t is so critical to understand that the gender difference in communication is about STYLE, not SKILLS. All too often, by our very natures, we are tempted to focus blame on the other person for not being able to communicate, when the reality is - IF YOU FAIL TO COMMUNICATE YOUR MESSAGE EFFECTIVELY, IT'S YOUR FAULT.
That's a pretty strong statement, but I passionately believe that we are each responsible for our own message. If we know that the other person is going to have difficultly understanding what we have to say, it's our job to figure out how to get through. That goes for work, home and anywhere else you are trying to communicate.
This newsletter only touches the surface of gender-based communication, but I believe it will give you some tools to become a better communicator.
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Conversation Rituals
"What do YOU think?"
One of the tools women use to make decisions is called "polling", in which they ask their friends and family what they think about a situation. Women then go on to use all the information and opinions they gather to make a decision. However, when women ask men "What do you think?", most men interpret that as asking "What do you think I should do?". A better question might be - "I'm gathering opinions to make a decision, and I'd like your thoughts."
Ritualized Opposition
In my opinion, this is one of the most obvious areas of communication differences in the genders.
When an idea is presented to a man, the instinct is to find all the reasons why it won't work - this is called "ritualized opposition".
A woman's instinct is to find out how to make the idea work - how to overcome the obstacles.
Women will interpret this behavior as "He always attacks my ideas." A better way to approach this situation is for the woman to have thought of ways the idea will be challenged, and have answers ready. For men, a better way would be to consider ways to overcome the obstacles.
Click HERE to schedule Sarah as a speaker for your next event. |
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