Mothers &      

     Daughters

Silken Ribbons of Heredity Weave through Generations. . . 

Lynn and her Mom, Pat, share much more than their love of music.

Greetings!   

When I look at that picture of my Mom and me on the musical score background it makes me think of all of the wonderful times she and I have spent enjoying music together. I am so grateful that I share that with her. My Mom was actually trained as an opera singer!  In her teens and early twenties she took the ferry boat across San Francisco Bay (before the Golden Gate Bridge!) and the street car to her lessons. When her music teacher passed away she gave my Mom her baby grand piano, which has now been entrusted to me. At her recent 90th birthday party we had the honor of the Leavenworth Village Voices coming to do a short concert in her honor and their accompanist used my Mom's Piano-she was thrilled.

The similarities between my Mom and me, make me think of all of the factors that contributed to them over the years. While I agree that genetics played a large role, as you can see by our physical similarities, her behavior, self care practices, ways of eating, family recipes she used, methods of communication, and her emotions all contributed to who I am today. According to Christiane Northrup, M.D. in her book, "Mother-Daughter Wisdom" she states that "the mother-daughter relationship is at the headwaters of a woman's health. She goes on to say that "a loving, nurturing mother tends to become the very center of her family's health and happiness. She is like the family umbilical cord that everyone taps into for sustenance at all levels: physical, emotional, physiological, and spiritual. This nurturing role can be enormously fulfilling. It can also deteriorate into martyrdom if a mother gives her children and spouse the love and care she doesn't feel that she herself is worthy of receiving."

"Mother-Daughter Wisdom" describes that nurturing others as unconditionally draws on the energy center of the body, which contains the heart, lungs, upper spine, and shoulders. You have probably experienced the "pain" of emotion in your chest-- like a deep ache when you are hit with an emotional blow. This is where it affects our bodies us energetically. When a woman puts her own personal and emotional needs on hold she forgets entirely that she has them! I have sadly observed this for over 20 years in my practice-- so many of us were raised to be perfect caregivers. And I have seen many women who give so much that there is nothing left of themselves. It is exhausting and eventually we begin to develop resentment, anger, grief, longing for contact, depression, and pure fatigue. Dr. Northrup states that this is the energy pattern that invades our breasts, shoulders, heart, and lungs. She points out that disease in these areas cause the majority of deaths and disabilities in women.

Women that have the courage to break this cycle will be ensuring not only their own health but the health of their daughters.  It is ok to care for yourself and also the needs of your family. I had an instructor during my college years that told me to "nourish others from the overflow of your cup-do not scrape the drops from the bottom." When we take care of ourselves physically we eat a healthy whole foods diet, drink plenty of water, and exercise regularly. When we take care of ourselves emotionally we recognize that our emotional needs are as important as the needs our families and friends. We learn to honor ourselves and ask clearly for what we need without guilt. Finally, we cannot connect spiritually when we give too much-there is just nothing left and you begin to feel disconnected from your spirit.

The only way to teach our daughters to recognize and state their emotional needs and take care of themselves physically is to do it ourselves! Every woman who heals herself helps heal the women who will come after her.

Start today-get together with your daughter and enjoy an activity while modeling and talking about the importance of self care. I was blessed with a beautiful son who is now almost 24 years old-I am always amazed when I hear him talk about nutrition and emotional health. You don't think your kids are listening...but they are! 

Blessings to you for a beautiful Mothers day!

-Lynn

For more information see: www.drnorthrup.com