Dear God:  Is it on purpose our names are the same, only reversed?        

Dear God:  Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell  

one another?

Dear God:  When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?

Dear God:  Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a Dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around?  We do love a nice ride!  Would it be so hard to rename the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler Beagle'?

Dear God:  If a Dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad Dog?  

Dear God: We Dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God:  More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God:  Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

Dear God:  Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember, to be a good Dog.

1. I will not eat the cat's food before they eat it or after they throw it up.    

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I   like the way they smell. 

3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.    

4. The sofa is not a face towel.

5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.   

6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.  

7.  Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying hello.

8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.   

9.  I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house not after.  

10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.

11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch.

12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

 P.S.   Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?  

Thanks to Elayne for submitting this to me.     

Dog Halloween Safety Tips

Here are a few Halloween safety tips for you and your dog:

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• Dressing Your Dog In A Halloween Costume -  Guide Dogs of America encourages us to dress up our dogs. The main reason being that they want us to handle our dogs paws, ears, claws, face...etc. so the dog won't be shy or timid when their blind owner reaches for them or grooms them. Dressing up your dog is a good way to teach your dog to be tolerant when getting handled in different ways.  That being said I wouldn't dress my dog if I did not think he was comfortable in his costume.  Linus does not like getting dressed up, so when Halloween rolls around he does not wear a costume.  Be careful with your dog costumes.  Make sure the costume is comfortable fitting.  Also, do not leave your dog unattended when in a Halloween costume...keep a close eye on him and make sure he does not accidentally choke himself or ingest parts of the costume.
• Keep Your Dog Indoors - This may not always be possible, but Halloween brings added noise and activity that can potentially frighten (isn't that the point of Halloween...not for your dog) your dog.  While this may be fun for kids running around in costumes it's not so fun for your dog.  If possible try to keep your dog indoors away from those scary ghosts and goblins.
• The Counter Surfing Dogs - I'm sure no one likes their dog counter surfing (taking items from the table top).  This can be especially harmful to a dog during Halloween...chocolate can be quickly gobbled up and it's quite toxic to your dog.
• Scary Halloween Decorations - While scary Halloween decorations can be fun for you and the family they can potentially be harmful to your dog.  Candles in Jack-O-Lanterns can be knocked over burning your dog.  Glass decorations can be broken or consumed.  I've even heard of a dog consuming an entire pumpkin.  When decorating your home be sure to keep your dog in mind and a close eye on his actions when he's around any Halloween decorations.
• Trick or Treaters - Some dogs can be quite fearful of people in scary costumes.  Others might be just fine.  If you live in a neighborhood with lots of children then you will potentially have lots of trick-or-treaters.  If your dog is like our dogs then he will not enjoy the ringing of the doorbell over and over as well as children in scary costumes.  It also might be a good idea to keep your dog away from the front door with a baby gate.  If you invite guests inside you should introduce them to your dog in a positive manner.  If your dog's still frightened you might want to keep him in another part of your home to avoid the commotion of Halloween guests.

October is Adopt-A-Shelter-Dog Month