I once worked with an individual who earned an excellent reputation for delivering results. She achieved the objectives that were assigned to her, sometimes in spite of challenging issues and situations. She used her gas (skills and capabilities) and led her teams like she was operating a high-powered automobile. She would put the pedal to the medal and achieve the objectives come hell or high water. Her track record positioned her for assignments to projects and initiatives of increasing importance to the company. Management eventually assigned her to lead one of the most important initiatives in the history of the company.
Then, she hit the wall. Management gave her the signal that advancement for her was no longer in her future with the company. She was given a special assignment which she understood was her last assignment with the company. The special assignment would end within an understood period of time.
How could this have happened? She accomplished what the company expected of her. She executed. What she did not realize was that her style and approach to managing were damaging her relationships with members of her team and with management. She used her gas (skills and capabilities) but did not maintain her oil. Her oil was the relationships that she needed to establish and nurture to avoid damage to her engine, the personal assets that she brought to the company. Her peers and superiors tried to alert her to the need to build effective relationships. (The engine warning lights illuminated.) She did not heed the alerts.
In the intensity of delivering results, we can easily overlook the importance of establishing and nurturing effective relationships. This is indeed a challenge. What can we do to overcome this challenge? What are the antidotes? I offer 3 antidotes that will help you ensure that you build effective relationships while meeting your commitments.
- Understand and reflect the core values of your company in your interactions with your peers, subordinates and superiors.
- Respond instead of reacting to challenging situations and issues.
- Use the Know, Like and Trust Approach to building relationships.
Companies establish core values to govern the way it conducts business. Core values define the culture of the company. Values provide the common ground that enables employees to interact to achieve the goals of the company. Examples of core values are respect, integrity, passion for excellence, accountability and collaboration. It is the common practice of companies to list their core values on its internal and external websites.
What if your company has not established its core values? What can you do? I recommend that you identify your personal values and reflect them in your interactions with others. This will result in consistency in the way you interact with others. People are not comfortable with inconsistency. It is easy to find common ground with others when they are comfortable with you. There are tools that can help you identify your personal values. A coach can also help you.
When we respond to a situation we act in a manner that deals with the situation rather than creating additional issues, challenges or problems. You will not allow the current situation to spill over into future interactions.
- Listen to what others have to say.
- Seek to understand before attempting to be understood.
- Focus on the facts. Do not let your emotions gain control of what you say or do.
Trust is an essential part of an effective relationship. We build trust when individuals are familiar with us (know) are comfortable with us (like).
- Become familiar with individuals before you dip into the trust well. For instance, get to know individuals before assignment to a common project or assignment.
- Be consistent in your actions, what you say and how you present yourself. (Reflect the core values of your company or your personal values).
- Understand that trust is earned. Deliver on your commitments. Start with simple commitments and expand the trust as the commitments become bigger.
When it comes to performance that will sustain or enhance your position in your organization, it is more than the execution of the current objectives. It is your ability to repeat that performance from assignment to assignment or project to project.
Your gas (skills and capabilities) will get you through today.
Your oil (relationships) will get you through tomorrow.
