The most sacred, most important day of my life is fast approaching - I am getting married.   It's difficult to express the excitement and anticipation I feel at this very moment. Like every little girl with a romantic heart, I have been waiting for this day my entire life. I have found my best friend in the world, the man I will spend my life with - Jordan. 

Robin Curry, AFS Speaker

This dream has been a long time coming.  As I say to students in my Aim For Success programs, "I didn't have the easiest life growing up, and the odds certainly weren't in my favor."  I was raised by a single mom in a small, poor community in Arkansas. My dad was a homeless drug addict who lived on the streets.  By society's standards, I should have become a statistic, but around the age of 13 I made a decision to avoid sex, drugs and alcohol. Instead of dealing with risky behaviors, I chose to focus on my dreams and goals of college, a career and a family. 

That decision enabled me to do well in high school. I graduated as Salutatorian of my high school and received a scholarship to college. My degree in Communication led me into abstinence education in Arkansas.  That opportunity paved the way for me to go to work for Aim For Success, where I now have the privilege of standing in front of thousands of young people and discussing the very issues I overcame in my life.

I can truly say that at this juncture in my life I am so grateful. I'm grateful for my college degree, a job that allows me to empower teenagers day after day, and for the amazing relationship Jordan and I have developed. But my life could have easily gone a different direction. Growing up without a father left me starved for the affection of a daddy. I went through my teenage years constantly seeking approval from guys. Had I not made a commitment to myself, my mom and God to remain abstinent until marriage, I could easily see myself now struggling in a life of poverty and raising two or three children as a single mom.

But it's not just me; other young people are beating the odds and overcoming their painful pasts as well. I remember a girl I worked with in Arkansas. She was raised in a horrific environment of drugs and sexual abuse. The gang she belonged to provided a sense of belonging. When I met this girl, she was at the roughest point of her life, and she was only 14.

I remember the first day we met. I was speaking at her school about choices. I explained to the students that choices they make today will lay a foundation for their future. After the program, she came up to talk to me. She told me about the drugs, the abuse and the gang activity. When I asked what she dreamed of becoming someday, the anguish on her face momentarily faded. With a faint smile she replied, "an author." Then I told her about my past and how I became determined to trade in the destructive path society expected me to follow for a life filled with exciting dreams and goals. I assured her she could also achieve her dreams - if she focused on making good choices. 

I returned to her school several years in a row and watched the transformation in her life. She left the gang and got serious about school. Today, she's in college pursuing her dream of writing. In fact, she'll be the first in her family to graduate from college. All this has been possible because of the choices she made. This young lady chose not to be defined by her circumstances. Instead, she chose to define her future by the good choices she made.

You also have the ability to define your future by the choices you make. But be warned, it isn't easy to say no to drugs, alcohol and sex as a teenager - especially if you're dealing with disappointment, pain and an empty heart that longs for acceptance. But having a dream and strong values can revolutionize your world. I'm here to tell you the loving, healthy relationship Jordan and I now share is the most healing thing to the heart of that little girl inside me who never really knew her daddy.  As my wedding day is now fast approaching, I am so thankful for that commitment to sexual abstinence I made as a young teenager. The fact that I have no painful memories of past lovers, pregnancies or STDs will make my wedding day all that more special!

So what choices are you making? Are you headed on a path toward an exciting future or a path of destruction? Remember, the choices you make today will define your future. 

Family discussion:

1.  What is your dream in life?

2.  Discuss the values that define who you are.

3.  How can having a dream and strong values revolutionize your world?

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