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I'm Not Buying!
by Denise Hedges
This is a funny story. Not so much ha ha funny as it is simply revealing of the funny ways we think and act.
I was giving a speech a few months ago and I always invite participants to sign up for a complimentary session with me if they've found what I've presented compelling and they're really serious about building their businesses.
At the end of the speech, I'll hand a clipboard for signups to someone who seems engaged, someone who I think is pretty likely to sign up. It's always best if the first person signs up, as it sets a trend in motion.
So, I hand the clipboard to this sweet lady who did, in fact, sign up. But, she comes up to me afterward and tells me that the only reason she signed up was because she didn't want to be the first one to get the sign up sheet and then leave it blank. She was looking out for me. She made it clear she wasn't someone who'd be hiring a coach and said that I didn't need to bother to schedule a session with her.
I thanked her and then asked if she thought she'd get value from a coaching session. She said, "Oh yes!" So we scheduled one. Why? Because I'm here to do two things. 1) Serve people and 2) Make a living in the process, doing something I love to do. I know full well not everybody is going to want or need or be able to hire a coach, but almost everybody can use a little help when it comes to clarifying what they really want and thinking about how they can have it.
And, you just never know if people will change their minds if they have a big enough "why."
When I got on the phone with her, she reminded me right away that she wasn't a potential client, giving me several reasons why she wouldn't be hiring a coach. Got it.
About midway through the call, she goes silent for second, then blurts out, "I'd be crazy not to hire you!" Long story short, she's now a client. Someone I love working with.
So, why do we do that? Why do we protest with such vigor that we won't be "buying" upfront. I've got a couple of theories, but first, when I say we, I mean we ... as in me too.
My partner in crime, Tom, and I recently bought some timeshare points. Here's how the conversation with the salesperson started.
"Just so you know, we won't be buying any points." We went on to offer our reasons. An hour later, we exited the office having bought points. To the extent that buying timeshare points ever makes sense, it made sense for us to buy given our somewhat unusual circumstances. But the point is that when we walked in there, we were dead set against buying anything. We meant it and yet, we bought. Hmmmm.
So, why do we do it? Could be that it's just a defensive reflex. We know the dreaded salespeople are gonna work their tricks and try to either snooker us or browbeat us into submission, so we let 'em know right up front that we can't be swayed. Like that works.
Or maybe it's what people who are pretty easily persuaded say out loud in an attempt to show that they mean business this time. Who knows?
But here's what I do know and here's what I want you to take away from this newsletter.
It doesn't matter what they say. It's unreliable information. Of course, you're respectful of what they're telling you and you acknowledge it, but that doesn't mean you necessarily have to believe it.
As long as you position everything you do as an offer ... to proceed or not ... to explore or not ... rather than trying to concoct clever ways to "overcome objections," you're in integrity. As long as your intention is to serve, you're fine. Just always ask if the person wants to talk more or not ... with no obligation, of course. If they say no, that's fine. But sometimes they end up saying, "I'd be crazy not to hire you!"
Best Wishes,
Denise | 
