I think there has been an overwhelming trend over the past many years that we, as a society, are entitled to, well, anything. Immediate gratification, perhaps? We want what our parents or grandparents have, but we want it yesterday, forgetting that usually, our parents worked pretty darn diligently for everything they have. And it took a while! But why wait?

 

We want it, so how much do we need to put down? ("At 0% interest you say? Well of course I'll pay it off within three months!") Then we are shocked when our economy crashes. I am certainly not an expert in economics by any stretch of the imagination [college macroeconomics was not awesome]. But it seems like we forgot to save, and learned to spend it all instead, so when there is a true emergency, we are stranded. And I think this sense of being entitled to things has now been inherited by our children.

 

I think it's human nature to want to give your children the best life possible, but this doesn't translate into "giving them everything." Let's look at a child's basic needs when they are little. They need food and water, of course, as well as shelter, clothing, and a loving family. But then we love them so much and assume that our role as parents is to shelter them from everything difficult in life, including hard work. We buy them an expensive toy ("Hey! It won Toy of the Year last year!") and they are far more impressed with the pots and pans and a wooden spoon. And we keep giving them things, not necessarily making them work for those things, and suddenly we are appalled that little Johnny won't lift a finger to help out around the house.

 

I remember observing a student of mine once who was yelling so disrespectfully at her mother for being late to school with lunch for her and all of her friends. The mom just said she was so sorry to have been late. Really? Or the child who constantly leaves homework at home and mom and dad keep running home to fetch it for him so he doesn't get a zero; mom and dad then rack their brains trying to figure out why he is irresponsible and unorganized. Our job as parents is to teach our children how to live life independently, safely, and lovingly. Part of teaching them this includes setting boundaries, letting them fall so that we are there to pick them up, dust them off, and give them a kiss. Don't fall for them....just be there for them after the fall! That's the way humans learn! We make mistakes so that our brain knows that's not the way to do it next time. If we keep doing things for our kids, they will come to expect it...wouldn't you?

 

Kids assume they are entitled to many things in life, not realizing that with hard work comes rewards. We need to point the finger not at our kids, though....but rather at ourselves.