When the Jews reached Har Sinai, the Torah writes, "Vayichan sham Yisrael." (He (Yisrael) encamped there). Rashi explains that the singular word Vayichan is used because the Jews were like one person. When they were together in that place of true unity Hashem said, "Ko tamar l'beit Yaakov," so shall you say to the house of Yaakov, "V'tageid l'bnei yisrael," and tell the children of Israel. Hashem spoke to the men in the plural form but to the woman in the singular form because they signify the unifying force. Women are not meant to lose their individuality. In fact, the Talmud says one thousand women are a thousand individuals. Rather, they are supposed to use their inherent power of bonding to unite others.

The woman is the force that enables connection. This exalted power unites each individual with all the different aspects of his personality. It also unites all of klal Yisrael. Unity doesn't mean becoming something other than oneself, but rather working towards a shared goal.

Even Jews who are very far from Torah still sense a deep inner drive for something higher. Women retain this power to unify people on this meaningful search.

Mishlei states, "The wisdom of a woman builds her home." Her task is to unite the members of her family with a sense of purpose. When a woman takes disparate parts and joins them together using the wisdom of her heart, she turns all of the stray threads into strands that are fine and beautiful. She does this by being connected (kesher) and having a relationship (yachas). Being connected means offering real understanding. Having a relationship means giving the other person a sense of belonging to something greater. A woman's wisdom involves weaving together people's lives. She begins by making cords of connection, extending threads that connect her and her husband so that all the disparate people in her home become like one person.

The Torah is compared to a woman because it too unifies all the different forces within us. The Torah is called the tree of life. When a person dies, his limbs and organs are still there, but there is no longer communication between them. A person is alive when all of the parts of his body and soul are connected and are working in synch. In order to create kesher (connection), there has to be commonality. The woman's task is to find that common goal within her home.

The relationship of the woman and her husband, their willingness for kesher and yachas, enables experiential possibility for making a true kesher with Hashem. Through a woman's ability to make connection, she makes kesher with herself and with the godliness within her.

Even her seeming disadvantage of wanting to charm her husband has purpose. The Gemara says, "There's no purpose for a woman other than for beauty, children, and feminine jewelry." These powers enable a woman to make connection. Her beauty allows her to create a bond with her husband. Her role as the mother of their children gives them commonality. Her regality gives her husband a sense of how much he desires her. These gifts draw both the husband and wife to their home. The woman can make her home a place of meaning and significance.

"Kol kevuda bat melech penima." One of the ten names of the soul is kavod. A woman's glory is expressed within her. The home is the place where a woman senses her inner beauty. The environment she creates, the kesher she nurtures within her home, becomes her crown.

In today's modern culture, women are brainwashed to avoid the home. We're told that real life is where you're achieving something out in the world. This way of life diminishes the home as a place of significance. The idea that a home communicates to its inhabitants a sense of their own value and chashivut (importance) is completely lost. Cooking a warm, satisfying, meal encourages communication, bonding, and a relationship. Straightening up the house so it looks orderly and pleasant creates a sense of kavod (honor).

Judasim teaches, "A woman of valor is her husband's crown." Granted that she is dependent on him and it puts her in a weaker position, but this enables her to receive and it enables him to provide. Together they can achieve shleimut (wholeness).

A woman is in a position of continued choice making in her home. Her choices are very deep and touch the roots of the inherent good and evil that live in every human heart. The framework a woman creates can either bring forth her hidden higher self that will in turn engender a positive kesher and relationship or the opposite. A woman's ability to build or to destroy has no parallel.

The root of all evil is separation and divisiveness. The Hebrew word for trembling, falling apart, is ra'u'ah, from the root word ra, evil. Evil is disintegration. There's no greater place than marriage where the choice between giving life or causing death, creating unity or disunity, has such a lasting impact. When you choose between unification and separation, between connection or disintegration, it's not just about you or your home, but about the very root of good and evil.

The days of sefirat haomer are days of spiritual preparation for the holiday of Shavuot.

The Netivot Shalom notes that the order of the moadim: Pesach, Shavuot, and Sukkot, are a way for a person to come closer to Hashem. It starts with Pesach and peaks at Shemini Atzeret. Pesach and the period of sefirah represent the engagement of a couple. In Mitzrayim, Hashem chose klal Yisrael as a nation. Shavuot corresponds to the wedding. The Torah represents the ring and through that gift we became mekudeshet (sanctified) to Hashem.

Shir Hashirim says, "Heviani hamelech chadarav." (The king has brought me to his chamber). On Sukkot, Hashem brings us into his home, the sukkah. Sukkah is the numerical value of ninety one, which equals the two names of Hashem - yud keh and adnut. On Shemini Atzeret there's a yichud ila'a, a higher union between Hashem and klal Yisrael.

The Rashash writes, "The days of sefirat haomer are the root of the whole year." The way a person prepares himself for the spiritual marriage with Hashem that is the way his connection with Hashem will be during the year. This is why it's so important to prepare ourselves properly. Depending on how much a person solidifies his connection with Hashem and desires to be close to Him, that is how much light he will be able to receive on Shavuot.

Although the holidays repeat themselves, a new aspect of Hashem is revealed every year. There's something unique in each yom tov that will never be again. This should give us strength to start anew.

When dough starts rising and one isn't ready to bake it, one gives it a smack and knocks it down. Every year the yetzer hara rises higher and when Pesach comes Hashem knocks it down and gives us protection. On Pesach we turn ourselves away from the domination of the yetzer hara and start setting our minds towards Hashem. The work of sefirat haomer is to begin connecting to Hashem, to sanctify ourselves, to correct our souls, and to refine our spiritual nature.

The Chiddushe Harim notes that the days of sefirah are an auspicious time for spiritual growth because during this period our ancestors were redeemed and we were elevated from lowly slaves to the level of receiving the Torah.

The Sefer Torat Chaim comments on the word of the verse, "Usefartem lachem." Lachem is rashei tevot, Kdai l'tahreinu miklipasenu." The essence of sefirah is to purify ourselves. The Ohr Hachaim says that Usefartem comes from the same root as sapir v'yahalom, a sapphire stone. Through the counting, one polishes oneself like a sapphire stone. Every year klal Yisrael go through the forty nine days when Hashem weakens the power of the evil inclination so we become worthy to receive the Torah.

The Shem Mishmuel says that even if a person doesn't feel any purpose in counting at all he has to believe that his soul is being purified. This gives a person strength to start anew.

Sefirah is a time to work on kedusha (sanctity) and tahara (purity). Every person has their portion in Torah and if a person doesn't purify himself he cannot receive his portion.

Rav Pinchos Koritzer notes that the or haganuz , the hidden light that Hashem created at the beginning of time, is hidden in the thirty six tractates of Shas. Baal Haturim says et ha'or has the numerical value of 613. Every mitzvah a person does reveals another aspect of this hidden divine light.

May the Torah and mitzvot engendered through our inner work during sefirah bring us to new levels of sanctity in serving Hashem. May we merit to receive our full portion in Torah.