16 Presentations in 8 Days

May 11 at 11am - Constant Challenge: Spiritual Survival at Machon Lev V'Nefesh , Bais Shvidler -244 Rt 306 in Monsey for  Chani Juravel
May 11 - Dimensions of Happiness at Night in Passaic NJ with Emunah Women
May 12^th at 9:30 in Highland Park, NJ - Seizing the Moment
May 12^th 4:00pm- Speech to Beis Yaakov in PN
May 12^th 8:30 - Five Steps to Greatness -  Fundraiser for the Mikveh of  Scranton , PN
May 13 Erev Shabbas  Tips-Tricks-and-Organizing-Your-Classes at Torah U'Mesorah Convention In Pennsylvania
May 14 ( Shabbos Kodesh ) Dimensions of Happiness at Torah U'Mesorah Convention In Pennsylvania
May 14 - Motzei Shabbos Kodesh to Principals at Torah U'mesorah Comvention - Interacting-wth Text
May 15^th - 10 am  - Bechukosai - Consequences of Complacency  - Special Live in Person Class in Hillcrest NY at Torah Center of Hillcrest, 171-05 Jewel Ave Hillcrest NY 11365 at 10 am .
May 15^th - 1 pm Bechukosai- Consequences of Complacency Shiur in apartment in Washington Heights
May 15^th -  Lessons from the Frightful Fall  ( dealing with the 'downs' of life )  8 pm  at Congregation Ahavas Yisroel ,147-02 73^rd Avenue
,Kew Gardens Hills, NY 11367
May 16^th at a girls high school in New York Area - Teacher Training and Student Development
May 16^th at Night 8:45 " Shavuos and Ruth - Inner Dimensions  at Congregation Beth Abraham in Teaneck
May 17^th at 10:30am in Queens at Jodi's - Lag b'omer - in depth learning.
May 17^th  - Pesach Sheni - 2nd Chance -  Tuesday at 8:30pm OZ at 118 West 95th Street NY
May 18th in the Morning at the Ohel Sarah - Amen Group - Pesach Sheni 2nd Chance
May 18th Fly Back to the Holy  Land

The period of sefirat haomer leading up to Shavuot is an opportune time for self-rectification. The Zohar writes that we must purify our hearts to receive the Torah. In Sifsei Chaim, Rav Friedlander notes that success in Torah is not so much dependent on the ability of the mind, but rather on the heart. We ask Hashem, "Hu yiftach libeinu.." open our hearts to know your Torah. The heart is the seat of man's desires. Yearning to grow in Torah stems from the heart. Purifying oneself leads to elevated desires.   

The Naharei Eish points out that the way a person learns, depends on his heart. A pure heart will draw a person to learn lishma (for the sake of Heaven). He will not be influenced by other people. Rather he will cleave to Hashem and invest all his effort to fulfill His will. The Chazon Ish writes that if a person does not work to eradicate his ingrained evil middot, then even if he has a great mind, he will not grow in learning. This is because sinful traits close the gates of knowledge and understanding. One needs a refined eye and heart to truly understand Torah. The Meor Enayim adds that someone who is very materialistic will view Torah as divided between good and bad. Therefore we must purify ourselves during these weeks of sefira so that materialism will not blind us from seeing the clarity of Torah.

The Gemara writes about one who learns Torah, "Zoche sam hachaim, lo zoche sam hamaves"-If he is meritorious, then Torah is the elixir of life, if he is not meritorious, it becomes the potion of death. Zoche can also be translated as refined. A refined person who learns Torah tastes life, an unrefined person samples death.  The Gra compares Torah to rain. Rain will make both good and bad vegetation grow, depending on what was sown. Similarly, when a person studies Torah, if deep inside of him, he is pure, more good will result. If he is not, crookedness will emerge.

During Sefira, as we prepare to receive our portion in Torah, we ask v'ten chelkeinu-Give us our portion. Shavuot is a day of judgment, when it is determined how much Torah we will receive for the year. If a person works to purify himself before Kabalat Hatorah, he will receive a much greater portion.

Next week we will continue discussing the proper preparation for receiving the Torah.

Parshat Emor primarily focuses on three topics. Initially the Torah discusses the halachot of Kohanim and that which relates to their service in the Beit Hamikdash. Subsequently it devotes the bulk of the parsha to the holidays, and then ends with the tragic episode of the megadef-the blasphemer.  What is the common thread running through these three elements?

The answer is embedded in the name of the Parsha itself-"Emor" which comes from the root word "Amira."-to speak. When the Torah introduces the topic of Kohanim it says, "Emor el hakohanim..." The moadim are described as bikurei kodesh and the Targum explains that this refers to a particular time that has great significance. The Rambam notes that these are the holy days when Klal Yisrael would gather to thank and praise Hashem. Our main focus and avodah on Yom Tov is amirah-saying shir v'shevach to Hashem. Similarly, we see the great negative power of speech through the story of the megadef.

In Breishit the Torah portrays the creation of man, "Vayehi adam l'nefesh chaya." Man became a living being. Targum translates nefesh chaya as ruach m'mimaleleh-the power of speech. Hashem gave man the ability to express himself and to articulate his ideas.  This makes him unique over all segments of creation.

"Emor v'amarata." The Kohanim followed the dictums of Hashem. Through amirah one can come to unbelievable levels. And indeed during the moadim, when a Jew communes with Hashem, he can scale very great heights. Conversely, corrupted speech causes a person to fall to the lowest depths as evidenced by the blasphemer. The lesson of Parshat Emor is the potency of speech. May we merit to use this gift correctly.

The melacha of koshair (tying knots) is derived from the times of the Mishkan when the Jews would tie down their tents to pegs stuck in the ground. This was meant to be a permanent type of knot, as the Jews in the desert did not know when they would travel again.

The melacha of koshair corresponds to the melacha of mattir (untying). Any knot that may not be tied on Shabbat, may not be untied on Shabbat.

The Mishna in Mesechta Shabbat discusses various types of Biblically prohibited knots.  A classic example is the kesher hagemalim (the knot of the camel drivers). The camel driver would make a permanent knot on a rope attached to the camel's nose ring. The other end of the rope would be tied to a pole. Another example given is the sailor's knot. The sailor would tie a permanent knot on a rope attached to his boat. The other end would be tied to the pier. In both examples, the first knots which are meant to last permanently, are Biblically prohibited forms of koshair. 

According to Rashi:

A permanent knot such as a shoemaker's knot which attaches the straps of a sandal to the sole, is ossur m'dorayta (Biblically prohibited).

A quasi-permanent knot such as the loose knot the Rabbanim would make on the straps of their shoes so they could be slipped on and off without untying, is ossur m'drabanan (Rabbinically prohibited).

A temporary knot on a shoe which is meant to be untied later in the day is permitted.

According to the Rambam and the Rif:

There are two criteria for a knot to be ossur m'dorayta:

It must be permanent

           It must be a knot that requires expertise such as a craftsman's knot.

A knot that only has one of the above criteria, for example a temporary craftsman's knot or an ordinary permanent knot is ossur m'drabanun.

A knot that has neither of the two criteria is permissible.

Question:

 I speak lashon hara very often. I have this deep inner need to state my opinions so that people can tell me that I'm right. I know it's very wrong, but I can't stop.  Can you suggest a plan of action?

Answer:

Your most significant problem is that you don't feel heard or validated. The Maharal says that women have more difficulty with sins of speech because of their need to be understood. I would suggest you begin keeping a journal where you commit to writing down only good things about your life and the life of the people around you.  Devote a minimum of fifteen minutes every day for this. Writing will require you to change your mode of thinking and help you concretize and verbalize your experiences in a positive way. At first it will feel as if you are whitewashing reality and being dishonest. However if you keep at it and are careful to jot down only things that are true, real, and positive, you will begin to feel validated and authenticated.  The Gra writes that the source of lashon hara is our way of thinking. The dividing barrier between thought and speech is very fine. By changing your mindset you will automatically see changes in your way of speaking.  Work on hitbodedut. Talk to Hashem as you would to a friend. Tell Him what is in your heart. He can  alter reality and draw down blessing in the merit of your turning to Him. Take on a chesed project. This will help you develop empathy towards others. Work on becoming a safe place for other people to turn to. Move forward from a feeling of victimization to a feeling of giving. Synch your mind   to your heart, by studying the Maharal's essay on ayin tov and lev tov in Netivot Olam. If you are committed to change, you will surely see improvement for the better.