·Can you zip or unzip a sweatshirt with words on it on Shabbat? A problem arises with bringing together and breaking apart letters on the shirt much like a book with wording on the side. Therefore, it should be avoided if possible. One can be lenient in cases of necessity as per the Mishna Berura.

·Jigsaw puzzles that are meant to last may not be put together on Shabbat.  Wooden picture puzzles where pieces are fitted into corresponding holes are permitted. Picture puzzles with a background are ok for children. Puzzles that are meant to be taken apart and are affixed to a surface may pose a problem. However if the pieces are on a cardboard background, one can posit that it is the same as affixing a background to a background, which is permitted. Nevertheless adults should avoid this if possible.

·Writing with icing on a cake violates the Rabbinic prohibition of Kotev. It follows that if one cuts  through the letters, one is violating Mochek.  One may not cut through icing with script writing as the letters are attached.

·Are biscuits with lettering ok to eat on Shabbat? The Maharam MiRottenberg prohibited this. Most Acharonim permit it on the basis that the Maharam ruled stringently in a specific case of biscuits which were meant to be erased/consumed as a Kabbalistic segula (good sign) for wisdom.  Indeed the Dagel Merivava notes that it is permitted as one is eating the letters directly, there is no intention to erase, and the writing is temporary. Likewise, the Mishna Berura permits it as one is swallowing letters in the normal manner of eating.  

·Are chocolate bars with imbedded words a problem? Here too, the letters are engraved in the bar and one breaks the words with one's mouth and not with an instrument. The Chazon Ish, ruled stringently and prohibited it. The custom is to be lenient.

·A four- pack yogurt, which when attached form a complete picture, may not be broken apart on Shabbat.

·Food particles stuck to a bentcher may not be removed on Shabbat as one can come to pull letters off a page.

·Food packages with printed words or images should be opened before Shabbat. If one needs to tear them on Shabbat, one should be careful to tear where there are no letters or pictures or between the letters.  

·Shoes with soles that leave a written imprint in the snow may be worn on Shabbat as the writing is unintentional.

Purim is a unique holiday. It is the only Yom Tov which is celebrated on two different days, depending on if one lives in a walled or open city. In Megillat Esther, the reason stated for this is that since the Jews in Shushan had an extra day of battle (both the 13^th and 14^th  of Adar), and they therefore received a special day of celebration (the 15^th of Adar).  The Rambam and the Ramban offer additional explanations.

The Ramban suggests that the distinction is meant as rebuke to the inhabitants of the walled cities. The people in the open cities felt threatened during the war at the end of the Megilla and enthusiastically celebrated Purim the next year in thanks for their deliverance from their enemies.  In contrast, the people in the closed cities felt protected by the fortifications in their towns, and participated somewhat halfheartedly. They did not fully appreciate the miracles Hashem had performed for them. Therefore they were given the second day as a kind of chastisement.

The Rambam's take on this is entirely different. He explains that Purim is a celebration of incredible salvation. The Gemara emphasizes that the Jew's commitment to Torah on Purim was even greater than at Sinai.  At Har Sinai, they were forced to accept the Torah, here they willingly took it upon themselves. There, they beheld Hashem clearly, here they found Him amid darkness and much confusion. Purim is a pivotal holiday because there was an irrevocable, absolute, commitment to Torah and mitzvoth which has remained with us eternally. Although we celebrate the incredible uplifting of the Jewish spirit, the holiday is somewhat flawed as the miracle did not take place in Israel.  The Gemara adds that we do not recite Hallel on Purim because we still remained under the dominance of Achashveirosh. This is why we have two days. Shushan Purim is celebrated in walled cities which date back to the time of Yehoshua bin Nun. It compels us to remember Israel, particularly Jerusalem, and the fact that we are still yearning for the ultimate redemption.

Shem Mishmuel points out the significance of the 15^th of the month. This is the day when the moon reaches completion. Chassidut teaches that the imperfection of the moon represents evil and sin in the world. The sun and moon were originally created equal. The moon's complaint that two kings could not wear the same crown was the first sin which veered away from Hashem's original plan and created imperfection. The first fourteen days of the month when the moon is increasing in order to reach completion, is an auspicious time for rectification and repentance.  Kilkul (destruction) begins after the fifteenth day when the moon decreases. Sukkot and Pesach are a time when a great spiritual light comes into the world, much like the light which existed before the sun and moon were created. Hashem hid away this light because he foresaw that man would misuse it. He specifically designated Yom Tov on the fifteenth day, a protected perfect time, so that the light inherent in these days would not be misused by chitzoni-evil external forces.  

Walled cities have more sanctity than open cities. A wall creates a barrier and a protection for holiness. In fact, Yerushalayim is a series of walls. The deeper one penetrates, the more walls one encounters surrounding the holiest spot on earth. This is in direct contrast to open areas in the public domain where most evil is present. Our spiritual walls separate the good from evil within us. Evil can come in the guise of a mitzvah and we need to be continuously on guard. In our own lives, we need to build barriers around what comes into our homes, what our children are exposed to, and what we permit ourselves to see and hear.

The two days of Purim represent two varying models of achieving holiness. There is the tzaddik behind walls in a cocoon protected from the corruption of the outside world. This is Shushan Purim, the fifteen day, when perfection reigns and evil cannot take hold. There is also Purim d'prazim, on the fourteenth day. This signifies living in exile, unprotected, forced to face foreign influences, yet remaining pure and righteous. The Mishkan in Shilo had no walls. A Jew was permitted to eat the kodshim far out into the hills which still radiated holiness. Shilo is in the portion of Yosef and Binyamin. Yosef was a tzaddik without walls. He faced the impurity of Egypt head on and remained untouched. Similarly, Mordechai and Esther struggled with evil in exile and emerged unscathed. A Jew has the ability to remain strong even while external forces try to impale him. The two days of Purim are our key to attaining perfection. Whether we are lucky to be in a pure environment or in exile exposed to foreign influences, we can still remain staunch and true to our heritage.

Question:

I'm a baalat teshuvah, thirty two, and single. I am very lonely. I couldn't keep in contact with anyone from my former irreligious life.  Most of the religious women my age are married with many children and act as if I have nothing in common with them. The younger girls are only interested in getting married and I seem too old for them. How can I find friends?

Answer:

The nisayon of loneliness is one of the most difficult challenges. You are not the only older single around. If you live in New York, try Ohr Naava, an amazing center for women to come together for friendship and learning. You could find many new friends there. If you don't happen to live in New York, I would recommend you get involved in kiruv or chesed. You will find things in common with the people you meet, on the basis of your shared experiences. Don't give up trying to find new friends, but learn to make Hashem your friend. Everyone has periods of unsolicited loneliness in their lives, whether before marriage, within marriage, or in the later years. At such times, Hashem is really telling us to turn to Him."Zeh dodi v'zeh rei'ie"-This is my lover, this is my companion. Learn to talk to Hashem. Make time for Him every day. Speak to Him in your own words. Express your deepest feelings and longings. You can sing, shout, cry, or whisper. Begin with five minutes and move up to an hour. Before long you will find yourself in a profound relationship which will give you an inner sense of who you are and who Hashem really is. This will stay with you for the rest of your life and give you the strength to face all of life's challenges with faith and fortitude.