Managing conflict in the workplace is an important leadership skill. People often think of conflict as fighting. It might be, but fighting is only one way of dealing with conflict. Conflict is the condition in which people's concerns appear to be incompatible. A concern is anything people care about. In an organization, people's concerns might center on such things as deciding how to allocate resources, determining what facts bear on an issue, and supporting different strategies.

Having the skills to resolve conflicts in organizations and businesses is a major challenge the CEO and business owner faces. Being able to handle conflict in a productive way is frequently mentioned as one of the most challenging skills for people. When setting up Standard Oil Company, the elder John D. Rockefeller said, "The ability to deal with people is as purchasable a commodity as sugar or coffee, and I will pay more for that ability than for any other under the sun."

As leaders, it's up to us to resolve conflicts. We can do it in a way that destroys productivity and relationships, or we can address it as "constructive discontent "and discover ways to approach the challenges it provides. Letting go of our comfort zone can be very difficult, and constructive discontent can help us realize when it's time to let go and try something new - to take a leap of faith.

Many of the advances we make are a result of constructive discontent. When we are unhappy about something, we get creative and come up with ways to do it different or invent something to make a change. The discontent becomes a source of progress.  

To lead smarter is to communicate and not try to suppress the constructive discontent, but to stay grounded and learn skills that deal with those emotions. We must become less stressed and develop ways of reframing our thinking that helps us move past the emotions we undoubtedly will feel.

In a recent blog, Irene Becker, a coach and consultant, gives us tips to building constructive discontent. I share them with you today.

1. Expect change to be stressful, but know that you can use them to move forward smarter, faster, and happier.
2. Understand and limit crisis orientation.
3. Be gentle with yourself. Get rid of the negative self-talk.
4. Resist negativity because it will not take you forward. Develop positive habits of thought, positive coping styles that will allow you to build constructive discontent.
5. Develop habits of thought that will help shift your perspective and discover new options.
6. Develop flexibility by simply identifying one rigid pattern of behavior/coping and turn it around.

One thing for sure is that we have to know our own conflict mode and style, and how we can adapt in conflict situations as well as knowing the mode and method of how others around us adapt to conflicts we face.

Being "constructively discontent" may not be a bad thing if it is encouraged. Discontent with status quo and exploring avenues for growth can keep an organization and its employees hungry to accomplish more.    

To quote Cornelius Jansen (1585-1638), professor at the Old University of Louvain. "An organization is a mosaic - it is the profile of many contributions. The pattern is never a singularity - it is the fitting and shaping of many pieces."   

Conflict resolution is one of the modules in our Ascending Leader's Program™. Join me as a participant in the program and you will learn what your conflict mode is and how to identify other's modes and the best ways to work with them.

Until next month, take care.