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February 17th, 2009
Vol 1, Issue 2
SEAL Trident
SIT REP
SET News and Updates




Greetings!

WARNING: This newsletter may offend some people.  We do not pretend to be 'P.C'. or concerned for your feelings.  It is not our intention to offend or hurt anyone, but we really don't care if we do.

Along with our usual slander, rants, and insults we have included an article about how boot camp programs are helping people get there fat asses in shape.  Thank you to Patick from RED Elite Training Studio for the article and for not being a turd.  Please keep in mind that our boot camp program is much better than everyone else's out there.  If you have fat, weak, or pathetic friends or people you know that you just can't stand to look at please forward this newsletter to them.  Who knows, you might save their life! 

Laz and Andy
 
PHOTOS OF THE WEEK
tommyhighspeedleap

TOMMY LOOKING VERY GRACEFUL AS HE LEAP FROGS OVER HIGH SPEED!

FATTYhands HELLO FATTY!


GROUPVDAY
VDAY COUPLES WORKOUT.  GETTING IN SHAPE FOR THE BIG NIGHT!
In This Issue
Photos of The Week
Laz Unclassified
News/Announcements
Recruit Profile
Why Boot Camps
Quick Links

Join our Mailing List, NOW!!!
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LAZ Unclassified
Laz unclassified

"I Curse Like A Sailor"
I curse like a sailor. But when I really want to insult someone I use a special four letter word. I tell them to go on a DIET. Oh my God! That's right the most offensive word in my vocabulary is DIET. 99.9* percent of people cringe at the word DIET. Newsflash: every human maintains a diet. The difference is that some of us maintain a strict diet of Oreos and McDonald's, while others eat lean meats and vegetables. If you want to look better, live longer and have a higher quality of life...

Click here and scroll to the bottom to read the rest of Laz's article. 
SET Tool Says...
SET tool 2



"Studies show getting off your ass and exercising 5-6 days per week will actually produce results.  2-3 days per week is for the weak and those that wish to continue to look and function like a turd."

The All Knowing SET Tool
circa 2009

SET NEWS / ANNOUNCEMENTS
  • The SET Running Team will begin its group runs on Sunday, March 1st.  Most of you will be going out and getting wasted on Saturday night so we don't expect many of you to actually show up.  If you want to waste our time and feel better about yourself by lying to us and saying you want to participate email Mari.  She has lots of free time to waste. 
  • If you have a fat friend or co-worker that needs to get in shape, refer them to SET.  You will get 30% OFF your next month's membership!
  • The temperature is rising along with the humidity.  Make sure you bring enough fluids to each SET class.  Sports drinks are a good idea.  It may decrease your chances of puking and looking weak and pathetic in front of the rest of the class.  Don't worry though, some of you will still puke regardless!
  • A 'Pay Per Class' membership is now available.  Recruits that are afraid to commit to a month long membership can now purchase punch cards in 5 or 10 class blocks for $15/class.  For more info please email Andy
 
RECRUIT PROFILE
MARI SETMARI
NAME: Mari Novo
OCCUPATION: Marketing and Development
AGE: 33
FITNESS GOALS: Lose weight to eat more!
HOBBIES: Eating, Shopping, Talking, Working Out, Skiing, Googling
HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN A MEMBER OF SET: 5 Months
FAVORITE THING ABOUT SET: Andy and Laz
WHAT IS SOMETHING ELSE INTERESTING ABOUT YOU:  love to laugh, take walks on the beach:) DON'T LIKE LEFTOVERS!


MARI IS ALSO SINGLE SO IF YOU HAVE A CUTE FRIEND PLEASE FORWARD THIS INFO TO THEM.  UMMM... SHE HAS A REALLY NICE PERSONALITY!!!!  COME ON PEOPLE, HELP HER OUT!!!!
Why Boot Camp Programs Can Get Your Ass in Shape!

Boot Camps: Weapons in Weight Loss Battle

Does it seem that every time you pass a park lately, you see a group of adults doing push-ups or sit-ups? They most likely are not military recruits; they are just regular people taking part in a boot camp class. It is the latest fad in exercise and a great way to get in shape, according to a new study.

To read the rest of the article click here.
Now get off your ass and get to work! 
 
Sincerely,
 
Laz and Andy