| Greetings!
Happy May! We hope that you enjoy this month's edition of Moments in Mentoring. This issue contains Part 2 of the Phases in a Mentoring Relationship series. We will discuss ways to build on your mentoring relationship and common pitfalls that may occur. The most important thing to remember is to keep showing up. Every child wants to know someone cares and the best way to convey that message is to be present in their lives.
Keep smiling,
Cassie Alaniz and the Henry County Mentoring Program |
| Phases of Relationships - part 2 | |
 Mentoring Relationships: the phases
Every relationship has a beginning, middle and an end. A mentoring relationship is no different.
Last month we learned about the different Phases:
- Phase 1....The Beginning
- Phase 2....Building
- Phase 3....Testing
- Phase 4....Closing
This month we will discuss Phase 2....Building. Phase 2: Building At this phase, you and your mentee are learning more about each other and starting to understand what makes each other "tick". You will each start sharing more about your likes and dislikes, and trust starts building between you.
Now is a wonderful time to start goal setting with your mentee. You may start simple, for instance making a goal for the month. "This month, we will learn how to play checkers". Then develop a plan for reaching your goal, and at the end of the month discuss whether you have met your goal. If you have not met your goal, talk about reasons why and what you can do together to accomplish the goal.
This is a great way to teach your mentee how to set and achieve goals, decision-making skills, and planning skills. It doesn't have to be big, life-changing goals. Just simple and fun goals can help teach new skills. Common pitfalls in this phase include: - You may start to feel like you have to try to "fix" your mentees life. Remember that your role as a mentor is to be a friend and champion of your mentee....but not a superhero or savior. Many of the youth in our program come from touch situations, and if you feel your mentee needs additional resources, ask the Program Coordinator who can make recommendations.
- Boundary issues with the parents/caregivers. Sometimes a mentee's caregiver can start asking favors of a mentor. Your mentee's caregiver may want to sit and talk to you for extended periods of time about your mentee or their family life. You may find it hard to refuse such requests, but it is important to set clear boundaries with caregivers. If this happens, encourage the caregiver to ask for assistance from the Program Coordinator about other family resources. Iowa State Extension office and the State of Iowa have numerous family resources and parental support programs.
Next month we will review Phase 3: Testing |
| Activity Idea | |
 Traveling Around the World
Expose a mentee to another culture. Ask your mentee if there was a country that they wish they could visit. If they don't know, visit the library and search through a World Atlas. Learn about what other countries are like and how they differ from the United States of America.
On your next outing, you can decorate your home as if you were visiting that country. Wear traditional clothing from that country, cook a meal that is typical of the country, and play a child's game that is common there.
You can also research if there are museums or festivals in the area related to the country that your mentee is interested in. Explore, be creative, and have fun traveling!
Website resources to explore cultures and countries:(just click on the hyperlink/text below)
|
"While we try to teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about."
Happy Birthday
