I am always struck when life throws seemingly unrelated events or situations our way, and then later presents a beautiful opportunity to weave a connection between them and come away with a much larger realization or understanding. I had such an experience this week and would like to share a few thoughts with you.

Tuesday night I attended the initial parent evening for Ultimate Frisbee, which was a terrific presentation of information on the upcoming season and included clear expectations for students, parents and coaches. SWS will host grade level teams for 5th and 6th, and then an "A" team and "B" team for the combined group of 7th and 8th graders. As you might expect, this raised the issue of how those latter two teams would be formed, and how students might feel about being on a team that is perceived - actually, in reality is - better than the other. A wonderful discussion ensued about the value of children learning to manage disappointment, to take pride in simply being on a team, and to embrace that one cannot be skilled (aka perfect) at everything.

Wednesday night I witnessed a truly inspiring forum of sharing among 10th grade parents, who spoke openly about the challenges they are facing in guiding their adolescents through the stormy period of making wise choices - whether it be to tell truth, to not use alcohol, to honor a friend's confidence - and more. As a parent of five, three of whom have traveled this same road and two who will embark on it soon, the question of how to be the best parent I can, and what do my child's choices say about the quality of the job I am doing, resonated deeply with me.

Finally, my 22-year old daughter sent me an article from The Atlantic she recently read for class titled How to Land Your Kid in Therapy, inquiring if I had read it. My first thought was that there was a subtle message here reminding me of all the times we had arrived late for soccer practice or I had forgotten it was free dress and dropped her at her Catholic school in full uniform. (I could list many more examples but you get my point - as a full-time working single mom, I am not always on top of things.) I clicked on the link expecting to speed read yet another mother's apologies for doing her best which turned out not to be enough.

Instead, I found myself deeply engaged in a lengthy, well-documented article that not only gave me pause to think about my own role as a parent, but took me back to the two previous evenings I noted above. The author Lori Gottlieb, a therapist and parent, reflects on and tries to make sense of a phenomenon she has become increasingly aware of through her professional counseling practice of young adults, with seemingly near-perfect childhoods (they describe their parents as "awesome"), who find themselves in their 20's feeling "adrift" and "like there's a black hole inside." To her surprise and chagrin, these young people for whom we would think the world is their oyster, instead feel depressed, anxious, and generally without purpose. Why?

In twelve pages, Gottlieb explores the question, "Was it possible these parents had done too much?" To be honest, I almost stopped reading at this point, fearing I would discover that indeed my 24 years of parenting to date had been entirely wrong. But I stayed with it, as she presented research and writing on how the way we, as adults, think and define happiness for ourselves and our children has changed in recent years, and not for the good. The corollary to her initial query is, "Could it be that by protecting our kids from unhappiness as children, we're depriving them of happiness as adults?"

Dan Kindlon, a child psychologist and lecturer at Harvard, warns against what he calls our "discomfort with discomfort" - if a child can't experience painful feelings, they won't develop "psychological immunity." In his view, "It's like the way our body's immune system develops. You have to be exposed to pathogens, or your body won't know how to respond to an attack. Kids also need exposure to discomfort, failure and struggle. Civilization is about adapting to less-than-perfect situations, yet parents often have this instantaneous reaction to unpleasantness, which is 'I can fix this.'"

As an educator and administrator, I found myself thinking about the possible implications all this has for schools, specifically SWS, and our role in guiding the development of a child's head, heart and hands. Do we unknowingly contribute to some of the issues Gottlieb highlights, with our nurturing and compassionate approach to our work? Do we offer praise and accommodation at the expense of encouraging resiliency and perseverance? In our relationships with parents, do we communicate honestly and openly, even when the conversations are challenging? Are we letting both students and parents bump up against the realities of the world, and even - gasp - feel unhappy?

GRADE 8 BUILDS ELECTRIC BUZZERS

Fortunately, the tenets of Waldorf education place us in good stead here. Our curriculum exposes students to a wide variety of subjects and interests, and facilitates the development of a broad range of talents. Every child's unique gifts are supported and encouraged, yet they must also explore those areas where they feel less confident and less capable. The artist is challenged to be an athlete and vice versa. The idea that children should broaden their horizons and "try some of everything" - experiencing both success and failure - is an essential part of the journey through SWS.

Running parallel to our goal of empowering students is our effort to educate parents, so they can support the work that we do at school and we can strengthen the partnership we share. The dialogue I heard at both the Ultimate Frisbee meeting and the 10th grade parent evenings tells me we are on the right track here as well. Discussing how we together help kids face disappointment, and how we together guide adolescents in connecting the consequences for their behavior to the choices they make, are just two examples. These conversations are happening every day, formally and informally, and flow easily from our shared commitment to a Waldorf pedagogy that calls us to place the development of the individual child as our focal point. If we can truly honor that, the issues Gottlieb raises of happiness, self-esteem, and purpose in life will fall to the wayside as we witness the unfolding of beings who fully engage in the world though their head, their heart and their hands.

Tracy  

We are very grateful and - dare we say it? - inspired by the quick responses we have already received to our recent request for sponsorships. Many thanks!  

• Wine from Five Zero Nine (facilitated by Byron Baker, Lavender)
• Beer from Mac & Jack's Brewery (facilitated by Ken Nabors, grade 7 & 9)
• Entertainment from Caruh Aveda Salon (Cindy DeSoto, owner, grade 1)
• Cash donations totaling $1,300 from 
• Modern Real Estate, LLC
• Paint Away! Ceramic Painting Studio
• Anonymous

We look forward to the Dessert Dash with desserts from Natalie Steiner (grade 6 & 8), Carolyn Cox (grade 7), Kim Bergstrom (6 & 8), Tracy Bennett, Ruth Kaufman (grade 6 & 8 grandparent), Julianne Bryant (Rosemary & grade 2), Karin Roth (host of 2011 exchange student), Maria Galvao - 2 desserts! (grade 6), Katrin von Homeyer (PTot, Marigold, grade 1), Maribel Cuizon (alumni parent).  We are almost half way to our goal of 25 desserts!    

Become Involved

We would like to call out to our community to become involved in INSPIRE in a number of different ways - your participation is crucial to our success!

• Volunteer to coordinate the Experience Items for the auction portion of Inspire. (Coordinating donors and volunteers to create about 10 totally enticing experiences.)  Your knowledge of the community will be invaluable - we do have someone who is not afraid to ask for the moon.  (OK, France.)  Click here to learn more. 
• Sponsor the event by cash donation or product donation to keep ticket prices affordable and support our efforts to host an inclusive, fun event for all. Click here to learn more.  If you have additional questions or would like to make a pledge but will be delayed in turning in the paperwork, please email Hazel Roos at hdamian@comcast.net and let her know of your intended pledge so she can take it into consideration for ticket pricing purposes.
• Sign up to bake a dessert for the dessert dash - click here. 
• Sign up to volunteer - click here for many different options. 

More information and invitations are coming soon.  We are looking forward to celebrating with you!

INSPIRE! Planning Committee

Mondays, 7 - 9 pm, January 30, February 13 & 27, March 12 & 26, April 16 & 30, grade school campus, music room  

Martha Swain, SWS preschool teacher, will lead this popular seven-session course for parents who want to create a simpler life at home.  Participants will read the book Simplicity Parenting by Kim John Payne along the way.  One of the things that Martha likes most about the book is Kim John Payne's nonjudgmental encouragement to begin change in small and doable ways.  No two families are the same, so no two families will simplify in the same way.  Click here for the flyer with further details.   

Read why fellow SWS parents appreciated the course:

"After reading about simplifying schedules, I made a weekly breakfast schedule (with pictures) for our family. It is posted on a kitchen cupboard and proclaims Sunday to be biscuit morning, Monday 10-grain cereal, etc. The girls actually seem to like the predictability, and there are no more contentious morning menu negotiations." Susan Green St. John, preschool  and grade 1 parent  

"We are finding our new rhythms with multiple trips to SWS everyday. We have been enjoying an even simpler routine than last year. I am always amazed that my kids don't seem to notice when I "simplify" the schedule." Luci Hackbert, grade 1 and 3 parent   

"After taking the SP course, I tried simplifying our weekly routine at home.  Now I have a rhythm that centers on what I need to do to run the house and the children fit in nicely.  This new rhythm is working well for us." Jean Wu, kindergarten parent   

"From being with the other parents at Simplicity Parenting, I got the overwhelming sense that I am not alone and I am not crazy for not being able to "do it all."  Living with less stuff in my environment has been huge.  Whenever I get off track of simplifying my life, I start to think about what can I put away or give away so I am surrounded by less.  I have a bag in my pantry always ready to accept items that can go elsewhere (to someone else who can use it more than us)." Cindy Scobee, grade 2 and 6 parent

SWHS Drama Club Presents Twelfth Night - Please Join Us!

Thursday, February 2 and Friday, February 3, at 7 pm, Theatre 4 in the Seattle Center House - click here for directions.   Click here for the flyer.  $10 for adults, $5 for students 

Parent Education Event - Educating Through Feeling - RESCHEDULED 

Thursday, February 2, 7 - 9 pm, Huckleberry Hall, Grade School Campus

In the child's grade school years, the stories of the psyche's journey become more accessible. What used to be terrors of the night, reveal themselves to be just "Heffalumps." The"wild things" become recognizable and more manageable as they show the archetypal nature of the temperaments. Join us to learn how to help our children navigate the enchanted terrain of "The Hundred Acre Wood" without getting stuck in the grey mood of Eeyore or getting wrapped up in the unstoppable bouncing of Tigger.  Adults only. Open to the public.  Click here for the flyer and information about other upcoming events.

This SWS parent education event will be presented by Johanna Steegmans, who was born, raised, and trained as a pediatrician in Germany. She came to Seattle in 1989, and completed her training in Naturopathic Medicine at John Bastyr University. Johanna was on the founding faculty of Sound Circle Center, teaching Early Childhood courses and the Foundation Year. Now, besides co-directing the Foundation Year at Sound Circle Center, Johanna travels and teaches here and abroad and works out of a private practice in Seattle.     

Thursday, February 16, 7 - 9 pm, high school campus 

Please join us for a special evening with Betty Staley, program director for Waldorf High School Teacher Education at Rudolf Steiner College.  Parents and teachers from all the area Waldorf schools are invited to the free event, and we hope that many of you will be able to be there as well. Click here for the flyer with details.

Virtual Reality - Reality as a Virtue, Presented By Jaimen McMillan 

Wednesday, February 29, 7 - 9 pm, grade school campus, Huckleberry Hall  

There is a battle going on for the minds and souls of your children. Their bodies are  secondary casualties, victims of "friendly fire." The battle is real. The enemy is virtual.  The elusive lure of virtual reality - TVs, computers, gameboys, video games, and electronic music threaten to program children's minds and paralyze their bodies, while shrewdly shaping their souls. This lecture will unmask these threats to see that the greatest danger lies in our not consciously countering it, and provide techniques to help our children navigate more safely through virtual worlds.  Click here for the flyer.  Adults only. Free and open to the public.

We look forward to welcoming our guests again on all three campuses on March 30.  We will send out invitations in a couple of days, if we have an address for your students' grandparents or special friends.  Click here to see the invitation for more details.  Would you like us to send an invitation on your behalf?  Read on...  

We are updating our contact information for families in the wider SWS community, including grandparents and alumni. Grandparents and extended family play an important role in our children's lives and we would like to keep them informed about the wonderful experiences happening at Seattle Waldorf School every day. We appreciate your sharing home and email addresses - click here.       

Each year the school accounts for the possibility of snow days when planning the calendar for the upcoming school year. We are happy to report that at this time there is no need to make up school days because of cancellations this past week due to the snow.  If there are additional closures during the current school year, there may be a need to make up days, most likely during Spring break. We will, of course, keep you posted in the event that we add school days to our calendar.

Summer Intensives - Save The Date 

July 2 - 13, Seattle Waldorf School, 2728 NE 100th St.  

Two weeks of intensives for practicing teachers including  

• Living Thinking and Sensible Science with Michael D'Aleo
• Therapeutic and Artistic Movement in Early Childhood Education with Nancy Blanning and Holly Koteen-Soule
• Lectures by Christof Wiechert, including Karma: Future out of the Past, open to all

....and much more.  Additional information will be posted on our website here.