At our recent staff training/brainstorming session last October, it was time to talk about articles for upcoming newsletters. I personally like to contribute in January because it fits right in to New Year's resolutions, setting priorities, and making plans. Over the years I have actually written articles that touch on some of the key components of this current topic, but not from this angle. In fact, even though our family has been involved with NACD for over eighteen years now, I don't think I could have actually written this one prior to now. It hasn't been until recent years, maybe even recent months, that I can honestly say that what I believed to be true all so many years ago has played out in real life. This article will touch on why we started and have continued with NACD for almost two decades; it will talk about how to accomplish more by having siblings do activities (cheap labor); and it will touch on the fact that non-hurt/neuro-typical kids can gain function exponentially by having their own programs as well. What I want to focus on, though, is beyond efficiency, beyond the hurt child gaining additional function, and beyond making good use of time via sibling assistance. It is actually directed at what I believe to be the greatest impact that having a hurt child, more specifically an NACD hurt child, has had on the lives and the development of character in his siblings. It is about the fruits of all those hours spent with their brother helping him to accomplish the impossible.

When we first started on NACD, our son had been receiving the very best of what traditional therapies had to offer, and yet we saw much greater gains in only 3 months of his individualized program than we had seen in years with various therapists and specialists. Our original prognosis for Evan was grim. Walking-probably not. Talking-very unlikely. Seeing-well, there just wasn't enough of the occipital region of the brain left undamaged. While Evan had begun walking prior to our initial evaluation, structurally it was not a good walk. Language was considered a handful of approximations for a very limited number of anticipated/rote words. Seeing-was just a dream. Within a short period of time on program he was talking more, walking better, and his brain was beginning to understand how to process some visual information. At the time, Evan was 5. Philip was 6. Kenny was 4. Mom was tired. We had a long program to accomplish each day but fortunate for me, the other two brothers were young enough to believe the old Tom Sawyer white picket fence routine. I made it look fun enough to hand over the pleoptic flashlight for several rounds a day to brothers. Very quickly they starting joining in on more and more, and within a few years they were experts at the implementation of Evan's program and, in fact, did a higher percentage of it than I did. I learned how to use the different temperaments of the brothers in order to decide who did which activities. They greatly enjoyed coming to Evan's evaluations so that they could hear Bob say they were doing a good job with their brother. More than anything, they learned that hard work (when it is the right work) accomplishes what some people would give up hoping for. I can honestly say that my boys have never looked at a task and said, or probably even thought, "This is too hard." They know that they were a big part of helping their brother do things that doctors said were not possible. I attribute the fact that at the ages of 24 and 22, Philip and Kenneth are decades ahead of their peers in their careers due to what they learned all those years ago with the pleoptic flashlight, the digit span cards, and all the other tools of our trade. They started to understand that once a good plan is established and worked on, success only takes a little bit of time and lot of determination. As Philip and Kenneth grew and became busier, I was fortunate to seem to have a supply of additional program implementers. Jason was born when Evan was 6, and Grant came along 4 year after that. I am not sure we even "taught" them how to step in and do program activities with their brother or how to assist in any way. By this time program was so much a part of our lives that it would have been like having to "teach" them to eat. It just happened because that is what we do.

It's January, a rough time of year for parents as teachers, as well as for the kids. The holidays are over, and everyone is frequently stuck indoors for longer periods of time. It is, in fact, the most common time to hear about "burn out." It's a funny thing about parenting, there are not a lot of breaks. It is the true full-time job. If your child is not successful, it produces lots of stress. If you are not getting things done with your child, it can produce stress, frustration, and fatigue. So let's fix that, shall we?

First of all, do you know why you are doing each and every piece of program with your child? Could you explain it to someone else? Do you have an anticipated improved outcome from that activity? What is it designed to do, and what are you looking for in the way of improvement? What are the nuances of your child's program? If you cannot answer these questions, please take notes in your next evaluation. Contact your coach and find out what you do not know. The program activities are meaningful with expected outcomes. Going through the motions of doing them without understanding why you are doing them leads to poor outcomes. Be successful. Be well-informed.

Get organized so you get things done. Use your new planner to help you organize your day. There is true gratification in getting everything or nearly everything done. Your planner isn't just for program. You can fit the other things you need to do on there as well. You can make planners for the siblings to help, or the sitter to help, or your spouse to help. If you know what to do, why you are doing it, and the progress you expect to see out of it, then you will be much more successful, more enthusiastic, more motivated.

Keep your eye on the future. You are working today to keep doors open for your child tomorrow. Can you visualize that? Today's work isn't about today. It is about ten years from now. It is about the quality of life that your child can achieve. Look at the impact that your education and upbringing had on you. Look at what you could have achieved or what you have achieved as a result of that.

The need for new input, new experiences is real. Get out of the house. Go to new places, see new things, and enjoy it. For your child, it builds intensity and leads in many cases to increases in language. Don't be afraid to go to some places that you really love. Your happiness and enthusiasm are important as well. Make a list of interesting places to go, and then make sure that you go to them.

Exercise and sleep are two things that you need in order to keep going. You also need a bit of downtime to read or listen to books, talk to friends, or soak in the tub. Downtime spent on the internet should not be confused with relaxing and refreshing yourself. Pick up the phone or go see a friend or relative. Find an aerobic activity that works with your schedule and do it. Learn new things. You need stimulation in order to be happy and think clearly. Do Simply Smarter because we all need to keep our processing as good as possible.