A Note From Carol
Dear Friends,
May is a month of renewal. Trees are bursting forth
with tender new leaves, tulips are popping open and
my hydrangeas are spouting green foliage with the
promise of once more producing a glorious, old
fashioned hedge on my shady northside. May,
following an often barren-seeming April, brings to life
for us here in the north the glory that's been dormant
throughout the long winter months.
Minding Our Elders has been undergoing a similar
refreshing change. The main Web site has been
updated by the host Boschel Interactive, a company
run by about the nicest person on earth, Michelle
Jakubiak. Minding Our Elders is now constructed in a
way that it will bring in the feed from the Minding Our
Elders blog, plus the new supporting host allows
constant change and updates to highlight what is
happening with all of my elder care clients.
This fresh new look and promise of daily updates and
more information for those who seek support,
information and comfort from Minding Our Elders, is
energizing to me, the founder.
Caregivers need freshness and change as much as
anyone. The sameness of daily caregiving, even after
an emergency of some sort has been resolved, can
be numbing, so breaking out of the routine in some
small way can be important for your mental health.
Often, getting a little respite from care can be
refreshing.
You, the caregiver, are growing and changing
as you cope with the daily grind of elder care. We at
Minding Our Elders plan to grow and change with you,
so we can remain helpful to you as you travel your
caregiving journey.
Take care of yourselves,
Carol
Quick Links...
Please visit our sponsor
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Hello!
Welcome to Minding Our Elders! Our hope is to break
the isolation that caregivers often feel. We'd also like
to share ideas, comfort and information that will help
you along your caregiving journey. Thanks for reading.
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ElderCare overview: Where to start, what to do
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Every caregiver's journey is different, but we share
many situations that help us understand one another.
Some of us watch while our elders slowly lose ground
and need more assistance as often happens when
people have dementia. Some of us find ourselves
caregivers overnight, as can happen if a loved one
has had a debilitating stroke.
Because my personal elder care journey spanned two
decades and involved seven people, I've been through
both types of experiences.
Many, if not most, caregivers struggle with isolation. If
there was a dramatic event that threw you into
caregiving, you may have had a lot of support right
away, but then people must get back to their own lives
and often the caregiver feels abandoned.
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Mom's going to live with us: How should I prepare my family?
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Decades ago, having Grandma come to live with the
younger generations was fairly common, and it often
worked well. It did for my family. When my brother and
I were teenagers and our little sister a toddler, our
grandmother can to live with us. Grandma was
crippled by rheumatoid arthritis and could no longer
live alone.
My parents built a house that would accommodate the
different generations, with some privacy for all, and
Grandma came to live with us. The home wasn't huge
by today's standards, but it was nice and well
designed for our needs. The arrangement worked.
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The Empowered Elder Advocate: We Won't Be Brushed Aside
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Many of us are old enough to remember the accepted
thought that the doctor was always right. We were
trained to bow to the superior knowledge of the doctor,
because after all, why would you go to the doctor if you
already knew all of the answers?
We still see doctors because of their expertise, of
course, but we are learning to be a partner in health
care. In my opinion, a good doctor will welcome our
input because the more they know about us or the
person we are advocating for, the better they can be at
helping us.
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Listen To NPR's Talk of the Nation
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Talk of the Nation, on NPR aired a show about
putting a loved one in a nursing home. Amy Dickinson,
of "Ask Amy," and I were host Neal Conan's guests.
The link below will take you to the archived show.
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Choosing housing: Options for seniors and elderly parents
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As our population ages and more of our national
focus is on senior care, we can find ourselves in a
muddle over confusing choices. How do we decide
what care our elderly mother or father needs and
when do we start looking for it?
Where should Mom live?
If Mom is still living in her original home, with no one
to look in on her regularly, she may be at a turning
point. Many people choose to start getting help from in-
home care agencies, since Mom can stay in her home
longer with this help. Others feel it's time for Mom to
move to assisted living. There are several things for
you and your mom to look at while you consider the
options.
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Talking With Parents About End of Life Issues
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When all matters dealing with health and finances are
taken care of ahead of time, families can relax
knowing that when death does come, the grief
process won't be muddled with frantic legal work.
Talking about end-on-life issues early on is highly
recommended.
Since, because of my work I'm steeped in elder
issues, guilt finally made me face end-of-life legal
work head on. I felt like a hypocrite not dealing with it,
when I constantly advise other people to do so. Most
people don't have this force behind them and it's
easier to put off the unpleasantness of thinking about
death.
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About Carol
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Caregiving expert Carol Bradley Bursack, Author,
speaker and columnist, presents a collection of
articles, stories, news and research for you to
browse. Please check the blog and Web site links for
more information and feel free to email Carol at
carol@mindingourelders.com to chat or ask
questions. Minding Our Elders is a registered
trademark.
If your group or organization would like to buy "Minding
Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories"
in bulk, please email carol@mindingourelders.com
for information. Bulk rates are available.
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