A Note From Carol
Dear friends,
I can't help but compare each new year with a fresh
tablet of paper. As a child, I loved the blank promise of
that fresh pad of paper. Pointy new crayons and new
pencils, freshly sharpened, also promised perfection.
That perfection was brief, of course. Quickly, I'd write
something and not be happy with it. I'd erase and then
smudge the once pristine paper. Often, I'd tear out the
page, crumple it and toss it away. After the first, errant
smudge, life was back to its imperfect normal.
The New Year is rather like this for me. Briefly, I love
writing or typing in that shiny new number. This year,
as I replace 2008 with 2009, it will feel good. The
old year hasn't been particularly easy. However, when
I look at lessons learned, some of them the hard way,
I know I've grown. Therefore, both joys and sorrows of
the year past have a positive effect on my life, even
though sometimes I have to search for the silver lining
in the cloud.
So it is with most of us. We have our good days and
our not so good days. We, as caregivers, have reason
to be proud of our understanding ways, our gestures
of love, our sacrifices for the good of someone else.
However, we caregivers, way too often, feel guilt
ridden. We didn't say the right thing at the right time.
We should have done something differently. We wish
we'd remembered to do more of something else.
We are human. We'll feel good on some days and not
so good on others. We'll have joys and sorrows in
2009, just as we did in 2008. However, if we learn
from it all, we will be better people as well as better
caregivers. And that, my friends, is what life is about.
Take care of your loved ones in 2009. But don't forget
to take care of yourself, as well. If you are human,
you'll smudge up that new year pretty quickly. But you
can take that smudge, and instead of crumpling it up
and tossing it away as a blunder, you can work on
making it a thing of beauty. Let the tough lessons
settle a bit, and then look at yourself. Enjoy how you've
grown as a human being.
Carol
Quick Links...
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Hello!
Welcome to Minding Our Elders! Our hope is to break
the isolation that caregivers often feel. We'd also like
to share ideas, comfort and information that will help
you along your caregiving journey. Thanks for reading.
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Use New Medicare Facility Ranking System as a Tool Not a Rule
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Nursing home administrators are worried, and for
good reason. The new Medicare nursing home
comparing site at Medicare.gov/nhcompare has gone
live. Nursing homes are given ratings, from one to five,
in four categories.
This is a simple rating system for complex elder care
centers. Please use this as a tool, but use it with great
care.
I knew this rating system would result in problems.
Many privately run rating sites have been online for
years, as have many county inspection rating sites.
I've often checked the ratings and compared them to
what I see and hear locally.
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What Happened to Good Nutrition?
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Another interesting article from Inside Assisted Liviing:
As a resident of an assisted living community,
maintaining good nutrition is one of the most
important ways to insure a long and healthy life. Food,
for better or for worse, is the fuel we run on. Just like
vehicles, bad fuel can cause us many expensive and
troublesome problems, especially as we age.
Unfortunately, even with this knowledge, nutrition
inside many assisted living communities can be more
of an afterthought than a norm.
Assisted living communities are not federally
regulated so each state develops its own regulations
and this can be challenging when choosing a new
home. Nutrition, foodservice, and sanitation
guidelines can vary widely across the country.
Educating yourself on elder nutrition guidelines,
coordinating with doctors and creating good
communication with the staff, both on the floor and in
the kitchen, is key.
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Top 10 Secrets That Aging Parents Keep - and What To Do About It
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Your aging parent may be keeping secrets from you.
Not necessarily lies, but withholding of information
that may be important to their health, safety or general
well-being.
Often, as people age, they become embarrassed
when they have to ask for help, or require assistance
in their care. So they cover up bruises, accidents and
money trouble in an attempt to maintain their
independence.
From falls to spending habits and from abuse to car
accidents, there are a range of "secrets" that elders
tend to keep, according to Marilyn Sharbach Ladew,
MSW, a nationally recognized expert in senior
caregiving.
1. Falls: "It's easy for an elderly person to cover up a
fall, particularly if no bruising or bone breaks was
suffered. Your parent may worry that you will try to
him/her to a wheelchair or walker," Ladew says. The
preservation of independence is of major importance
to older adults, even at the risk of falling.
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Dementia Not Consistently Considered as Cause of Death
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Both of my parents' death certificates cited the cause
of death as organic brain disease, which basically
means dementia. They each had dementia, though
each of them suffered from a significantly different
type.
Dad's was dramatic. It was the result of surgery that
was supposed to prevent the mental decline he would
eventually suffer as a result of a World War II brain
injury. Something went wrong in the surgery, and he
came out of that surgery totally demented.
Mom's dementia was a more general type, which
included memory loss and declining ability to make
sense of things, but she did not have Alzheimer's
disease or vascular dementia.
When I looked at the certificates, I was a bit surprised
to find organic brain disease listed as cause of death.
I was aware at the time that Alzheimer's was
considered terminal, as the body slowly weakens
and "forgets" how to function. But I didn't consider that
my parents would die from their dementia - especially
my mother.
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About Carol
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Caregiving expert Carol Bradley Bursack, Author,
speaker and columnist, presents a collection of
articles, stories, news and research for you to
browse. Please check the blog and Web site links for
more information and feel free to email Carol at
carol@mindingourelders.com to chat or ask
questions. Minding Our Elders is a registered
trademark.
If your group or organization would like to buy "Minding
Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories"
in bulk, please email carol@mindingourelders.com
for information.
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