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By HEAL graduate Ruth Davenport
This article has been shortened for this newsletter, for the full article please contact Ruth Davenport.
EFL as a Vessel for our Stories
When attempting to describe an Equine-Facilitated Learning (EFL) session to someone who hasn't interacted with a horse in this respectful manner or felt a transformative moment in the presence of a horse, we can only use the word "amazing" so many times. I'm finding the most powerful accounts of an EFL experience are the participants' own words from journaling between events during the session and capturing in their own words the exchange that just took place.
The experiences and reflections that emerge from interacting with the horse allow us to tell our story within the EFL sessions, a vessel cradled by horses and humans who hold "the sacred space of possibility" for us (Ingram, 2010). Focused on our physical and mental well-being, these horses, facilitators, and equine specialists create through empathy and compassion an invitation to take a reflective stance in which we can tell our story, examine our emotions, find comfort in a place of nonjudgment, and move to a place of healing. "If empathy is the skill or ability to tap into our own experiences in order to connect with an experience someone is relating to us, compassion is the willingness to be open to this process" (Brown, 2007, p. 44). As an EFL facilitator, we are called on to develop this skill of empathy and find this willingness of compassion.
Telling our Story
Story is what binds us together and makes us human. As a classroom teacher and a teacher educator, I have long appreciated the gifts of story as teacher; entertainer; and context for developing a rich, inquiry-based, integrated curriculum. Now I am coming to know story in a new light: "the healing role of stories and the therapeutic uses of uncovering, telling, and even revising our stories" (p. 8).
We are able to heal when we connect ourselves with others, and we do so by telling our story. This allows us to be heard, to feel affirmed, and to see we are valued and accepted (Brown, 2007). We realize we share situations and emotions with other individuals. "One of the most important benefits of reaching out to others is learning that the experiences that make us feel the most alone are actually universal experiences" (Brown, 2007, p. 127)
Stories can impart lessons; they can make us laugh; they can take us to fantastic realms filled with characters we strive to emulate. Other stories move us deeply. "They change us and bring us closer together. These are sacred stories...these powerful imaginative vehicles tell us about ourselves and in that way transform us, while simultaneously connecting us to our fellow human beings - be they our contemporaries or our ancestors...[these stories] get us thinking about what is important; they communicate through symbol and metaphor deep truths about the mysteries of life" (Simpkinson & Simpkinson, 1993, p. 1). These sacred stories teach profound lessons and "reflect not only who we are as individuals but also who we are as members of a collective" (p. 5). These are the stories that can emerge during EFL sessions.
Horses feel compassion and empathy naturally through a limbic connection with a person, which results in a perception of "feeling felt" by the horse (Siegel, 2007). There is a complex neurological explanation for this sensation, but I prefer 16-year old Chris's description after a potent reflective EFL session with a wise equine elder named Sigrid: "it was like she was hugging my heart." In moments like this, the participant feels loved and acknowledged, and can become open to feeling empathy and compassion for herself. The EFL facilitator and equine specialist feel compassion and empathy for themselves, the horse, and the participant.
Horses are non-judgmental, and to them, emotion isn't good or bad; it's just information. As EFL facilitators, we too have to own our emotions and stories without judgment - to walk our truth. "Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others. Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity" (Brown, 2007, p. 45). It is by telling our stories that we can know who we are and how we're connected to others. It is by telling their stories that our participants can know themselves and feel connected to us and the horses, and hopefully take with them the spirit and messages of the interaction with a particular equine partner.
We learned many valuable lessons in our EFL training program about being present and reserving judgment. We came to understand, as the horses heard our stories and those of our practice clients, that it is important to tell our story, because it brings us into the now and allows us to know ourselves with greater clarity. "As a mindset, being aware of the present moment without grasping onto judgments offers a powerful path toward both compassion and inner well-being" (Siegel, 2007, p. 96). We learned that "when you move through emotions like horses do, when you get the message behind a troubling feeling and change something in response, you experience greater periods of authentic peace and fulfillment" (Kohanov, 2007, p. 108). We learned that the wisdom of the horses can help someone make sense of her story without getting stuck there and that the telling can "soothe their soul" (St. Jacques, 2010). We learned that there is another story to tell, a life story separate from the loop, when we let the story go. We learned, as Chris did in a recent EFL session at Clover Haven, the horse therapy business in which I am a partner, that "A short but sweet conversation [with a horse] feels like a life time. It was like she was reading my story book."
References
Bergquist-Bowen, D. (2011). Personal communication, April 4.
Brown, B. (2007). I thought it was just me (but it isn't): Telling the truth about perfectionism, inadequacy, and power. New York: Gotham Books.
Ingram, K. B. (2010). Personal communication, May 6.
Kohanov, L. (2007). Way of the horse: Equine archetypes for self-discovery. Novato, CA: New World Library.
Shambo, L. (2010). Personal communication, May 7.
Siegel, D. J. (2007). The mindful brain: Reflection and attunement in the cultivation of well-being. New York: W. W. Norton & Company.
Siegel, D. J. (2010). Mindsight: The new science of personal transformation. New York: Bantam.
Simpkinson, C., & Simpkinson, A. (Eds.) (1993). Sacred stories: A celebration of the power of story to transform and heal. New York: HarperSanFrancisco.
St. Jacques, L. (2011). Personal communication, April 4.
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