Powerful Performance
April 2012 
lilly topper

 
Greetings!

In this newsletter I'll share with you:

  • A special announcement of April's free teleclass.
  • A client's experience of pushing
  • A tapping protocol to use when you find yourself pushing too hard to "make it happen"

Announcing - New FREE Teleclass

 

Performing Without Fear: Helping Public Speakers and Musicians

Deliver their Most Powerful Performance!

 

Monday, April 23, 2012

 

1:00 PST / 4:00 EST   

 

Register by clicking here 

 

People who perform in front of audiences have very special challenges! Performance anxiety can show up as a few jitters, dry mouth and shaking hands -- for some, 'stage fright' is debilitating. Many with this anxiety avoid any circumstance that may involve speaking / performing in front of others - and they suffer from a sense of hiding from the world and the missed opportunities for self-expression.

 

Join me for this experiential teleclass to learn how to identify and eliminate the mental / physical barriers that keep you off-stage, nervous, holding back, and just plain not giving your best!  

  • You'll experience a powerful tool that effectively shifts anxiety - and it's easy to use
  • You'll have the actual experience of this method during the class
  • You will experience ability to uncover hidden blocks presently unknown to you
  • You'll learn how to clear the real causes of your anxiety
  • You'll receive support from hearing that others experience what you do - You are NOT alone!
  • You'll learn that change IS possible - you will experience actual changes within the class
  • You'll experience the beginning of freedom to express yourself - and do it WELL!

If you can't make the time, sign up anyway and we'll make sure you get the recording.

 

 

Don't let the Reverse Law of Attraction block you

Are you attracting the solution... or pushing it away?          

 

It's exciting when you focus on something you really want and "go for it," knowing you can accomplish it. It feels good.

 

But what about when that excitement dissolves into disappointment-an "I can't do it" feeling? You end up feeling stuck, blocked, paralyzed.

 

What do you do with that feeling? How do you get out of it?

 

Sometimes we respond by trying too hard-instead of letting the Law of Attraction work and allowing the solution into our lives. I personally continue noticing when these blocked, stuck feelings come up and I'm pushing too hard versus Attracting and allowing the solution. For me, it's been so essential to switch from this old pattern of pushing - and a lot more fun!


When push comes to shove

A client's experience of pushing

 

Asha is a talented and seasoned performer who has sung professionally for 33 of her 52 years. She called me from her home in Canada, alarmed that she was experiencing "breaks" in her voice. She also wasn't having fun singing, and she was avoiding practicing. Like any performer, Asha was distraught about this turn of events. The harder she focused on the problem, the bigger it became. You could say she was practicing The Law of Attraction-in reverse.

 

Her fear and negativity showed in the way she talked about the problem:

  • My voice is weak!
  • I'm having breaks in my voice - I'm scared of them coming.
  • I try to push through them but it's getting worse.

Research shows that focusing on negative statements increases their occurrence. Are you focusing on a negative situation in your life, instead of on the many strengths and skills you have to overcome it and move toward your goals?

 

When I do intake with clients, I ask several questions-and in just 10 minutes, I know a lot. For example, in Asha's case, it went something like this:

 

Q. What do you believe might be in the way of achieving your goals?

A. Fear of not being liked and fear of being reprimanded.

 

Q. How would you describe your relationship with authority figures?

A. Fear, deference, sometimes I need to please or get approval.

 

Q. Who had the power in the family and who did not?

A. My parents had no power and neither did I.

 

Imagine absorbing that NO one in your immediate family-those you depend upon for safety and guidance-had no power? Asha also shared that she felt unattractive, afraid of being bullied, awkward physically. Everything she said painted a picture of pushing hard throughout her life to be recognized, seen and-literally-heard.

 

In Asha's life, her pattern is one of pushing. And there's much the rest of us can learn from her example. Are you doing this anywhere in your life? Are you getting what you truly want? Are you having fun getting there?

 

Solving this problem can look easy, but the pattern of pushing rarely shows up in an isolated area of one's life. For Asha, it was quickly evident that several aspects of her life were complicated by pushing, by this "trying to MAKE it happen" attitude.

 

Pushing in singing or any kind of performing may be symptom of:

  • Pushing to be heard
  • Pushing to be liked
  • Pushing to be validated ("Am I OK?")
  • Pushing for recognition ("Will my mother ever SEE me?")

Asha would unconsciously push her voice in the hopes of being heard. Without meaning to, she was tensing all the muscles, tissue, tendons, all aspects of her vocal chords, lips, and facial muscles-her entire body. And the result was the exact opposite of what she wanted; a fluid, beautiful, flexible sound. Through EFT phone sessions, Asha made huge shifts in her singing and her enjoyment of practicing and performing.

 

* * * * * *

 

Before we start tapping, take a paper and pen for this easy, helpful exercise. List two or three times you recall feeling really "stuck"-and your response. Did you:

  • Push harder? (I'll make this happen, no matter how hard it becomes!)
  • Fold? (I give up!)
  • Find a way to ease off the pressure and resume, refreshed and productive?

Tapping Protocol

Use when you find yourself pushing too hard to "make it happen"

 

    (To learn more about How EFT Works - click here)    

 

I hope you find this tapping protocol helpful. EFT tapping has gotten me through many a blocked, frustrating time to one of easy flow.      

EFT Tapping Points Diagram

Karate Chop (tapping on the side of the hand)

 

Even though I have this "push harder" feeling, I accept myself anyway.

 

Even though I'm used to pushing-I keep working harder than anyone else-I love and accept myself anyway.

 

Even though this pushing gets me all bottled up, I accept myself anyway.

 

Eyebrow: It's just natural for me to work harder-it's what I've always done.

Side of eye: I feel I'm "doing something" if I'm pushing harder.

Under eye: I'm not having fun, but I can't give up!

Under nose: I'm afraid to try anything different than pushing through this.

Chin: Well, no, this pushing doesn't give me the results I want.

Collarbone: Yeah, but giving myself a break is lazy, it means I'm just not working hard enough!

Under arm: I don't get how other people can do things so easily!

Wrists: There is a part of me that would like an easier, more productive way.

 

Now close your eyes and take a comfortable breath. Take your time. Then note what came up for you as you finished this first round. Repeat this very same tapping protocol and do the same noticing when you finish the second round. You will notice some shifts already starting to happen.

 

Did you get some different thoughts or ideas? Does your commitment to "pushing" start to raise some questions? If so, you're ready for the next round!

 

Even though I'm tired of pushing, I accept and love myself.

 

Even though I'm not sure what else to do, I see that pushing keeps me tense and stuck-and I even accept that about myself!

 

Even though I see there are other people doing things easier, I accept them too!

 

Eyebrow: I guess there could be an easier way to be "good."

Side of eye: I'm a good learner-maybe I could risk giving up this pushing.

Under eye: I'm willing to try something new-it's exciting to consider an easier way to get what I want.

Under nose: Yeah, but, I'm pretty convinced I need to push to get anywhere!

Chin: Well, I've been pushing plenty and I see it's not working.

Collarbone: I'm willing to try something new-something easier and better.

Under arm: I like the thought of it being easier and better.

Wrists: I'm open to experiencing easier and better!

 

Again, take a comfortable, deep breath and fully exhale.

Notice how you feel in your body.

Notice your thoughts. Any new ones?

Notice what thoughts felt particularly interesting-you may wish to write those down! (These are your leads into some more artful, deeper tapping work)


Notice if you find yourself Attracting the solution and not so much pushing in the days or weeks ahead. Let me know your progress by emailing me at success@powerful-performance.comI'd love to hear how it's going for you and be able to share it with others.   

 

Here's to resolving those stuck places-through EFT and compassion. It's never too late to make a fresh, loving start on your dreams and all you can be.  

 

Quote

Even in your rightness about a subject, when you try to push your rightness toward another who disagrees, no matter how right you are, it causes more pushing against. In other words, it isn't until you stop pushing that any real allowing of what you want can take place.

--- Abraham (Esther Hicks)

 

Note on quote: Consider that even "pushing your rightness toward another" can be pushing against yourself!

 

To your best! 

     

Bernadette      

Powerful Performance

 Bernadette Hunter


In This Issue
FREE Teleclass
Reverse Law of Attraction
Asha's Story
Tapping Protocol
Quote
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Bernadette Hunter, MS, LPC,   is a licensed professional counselor and EFT
Performance Specialist  with over 25 years experience.
Bernadette works with athletes, musicians, performing artists, public speakers, and individuals.


 She is the founder of
Powerful Performance.
You can reach her at 303-300-6733 or by email at success@powerful-performance.com

 

   

 

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